"An actor is at most a poet, and at least an entertainer." - Marlon Brando
Some people to this day do not fully appreciate actors. It takes a lot of freaking skill to make an audience believe a character even a little bit. But then again, not every actor was that shining star on Broadway or tour de force newcomer. Some just had the right connections and thought it'd be cool, and some got lucky. Very, very, very, very lucky. That's Hollywood. That being said, not everyone who comes along is going to be a new Brando or Freeman or Dicaprio. And ultimately some of these so called actors are horrible and can also destroy a movie they are involved with (I'm talking to you Sofia. No I don't care who your father is; you just keep directing like he did). Then there are some who are bad, but you can tell they are at least trying. These are the ones who usually end up being funny, likable, or at least memorable once you're done watching their performance. So I will take my time to talk about a few actors considered to be bad by some and how they are bad.
(Let me note that none of these things are limited only to "bad actors," because I've seen plenty of good actors do these things at least once, whether it is just a line or an entire performance. So there.)
OVER THE TOP:
Yeah, you know it when it happens. That point where your only reaction to a person's acting is "....SUBTLE!" Anyone can read lines, and I will go into those who do so with little enthusiasm later, but the more memorable are the ones who read the line and take it with too much enthusiasm. This leads to them being really goofy.
Going classic, my most memorable over the top actor is Charlton Heston. Heston was considered to be one of the greatest actors of his time, but looking at his films now, you can tell a lot of his roles were written as being a lot more subtle. Planet of the Apes is a prime example. While most remember his legendary line "get your paws off me, you damn dirty apes!" or better yet, "You cut up his brain, you bloody baboon!" I remember his reaction to one of his fellow astronaut's placing a miniature American flag in a small mound of rocks on the "mysterious new world" and all Heston had to do was deliver a cynical, perhaps even dry laugh. What does he do instead: he freaking guffaws. He does it again later, again unnecessary (maybe he was high). Oh yeah, and watch him hold his nose as he jumps from the sinking ship into the water. He does little over the top things like this in a lot of his movies. Sometimes the roles he was cast in were over the top just because it was him playing them; it is just weird casting the most red blooded American actor as the Mexican-American hero of an Orson Welles movie. Still though, I'll have to admit he was still a likable, fun movie actor who here and there had his moments of good performances.
Then there are really good actors like Nicholas Cage and Christopher Walken. Though they are very good in serious movies (both have been nominated at the Academy Awards before), they seem to take any role a studio throws at them and play it to the bone. This usually goes along with incorporating their own strange styles and mannerisms into any given role, so they are already a little bit over the top. And by a little bit, I mean "a lot." Nicholas Cage has this semi-smooth yet explosive hyperactivity breaking through the surface in his movies. And Christopher Walken just might be the most memorable actor alive, as well as the most impersonated. His monotone droll has been segued into just about every type of film scenario; he's been a Bond villain, a Batman villain, a scarred soldier, a struggling father, a mischevious hobo, the angel of death (twice), a gangster (god knows how many times), and let's not forget a war veteran delivering a boy a very interesting gold watch. The screen can barely contain these two when they're on, either by sheer awesomeness or absolute craziness. Look up their filmography, or better yet go on youtube and look up some of their craziest moments.
Then of course there is Arnold. Arnold-freaking-Schwarzeneggar. The Austrian body builder who took America by storm in the 80s and hasn't gone away since. We all love him. Is he a good actor though? Well, that's debatable. I mean if you look carefully at--...fine! He's not that good of an actor. I mean, I doubt there was ever a point the people at the Academy Awards were thinking "I think it's Schwarzeneggar's turn this year." They weren't as kind as California. No he's not great, but I still think he's at least good. I mean no one likes someone this much for this long if he's been terrible the entire time. There have been roles where he has played dramatic very well. And as easy as some people believe it to be, playing an emotionless cyborg has to be convincing or else we won't believe it and Arnold pulls it off. But really, he is best being over the top. Sure "Hasta la vista, baby" and "I'll Be Back" are great lines, but we remember the really over the top and cheesy ones moreso. It works well with Arnold because, with that thick Austrian accent, just about every word comes out of his mouth is funny. I mean there's a video editor on Youtube, hh1edits is his tag (look him up he does amazing stuff), who has not one but two ten minute videos just full of Arnold's corny ass or over the top lines. It is priceless. But hey, we love Arnold as is and he really can't get any better...well maybe the people of California would disagree, but I still stand by him.
UNDERPLAY
To put it simply, some actors just don't put forth the effort in their roles. Perhaps they've tricked themselves into thinking they are awesome. This comes down to a lack of emotion or just pure robotic line reading. Either way it can be just as unappealing as overacting.
Here are a few famous examples, all basically the same. Keanu Reeves, known for The Matrix trilogy, is notorious as a, frankly, wooden actor. While I think he has pretty much grown out of his bad acting stage, the majority of people just can't let go of his terrible acting in his early roles. I mean Point Break? Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure? I think the simulated world of the matrix was far more believable. Nowadays, he's either a brooder or a cocky bastard. He's good in each type. If you want to see some of his terrific acting I'd recommend Hard Ball or The Lake House (he cries in both, and is believable).
Kevin Costner is another A-list actor, and also a director and producer, who has starred in plenty of well known films. I think this is a case where it is how he handles certain roles rather than him simply being a bad actor. There are some roles where he is playing soft spoken or distant and ends up being just a boring actor. Other roles where his characters are very much alive and full of energy and he himself is alive and energetic. I really think people give him too hard of a time, but he really isn't bad at all. They give the same shit toward William Hurt (an Oscar nominated actor) who is a favorite of mine, and is also terrific.
There are a few very famous actresses who I've never understood why they were ranked so high at times. Kim Basinger won a Best Actress Oscar for L.A. Confidential (she was good, but not Oscar worthy) when a superb role like the trailer trash mother in 8 Mile is particularly overlooked. Or Halle Berry, who aside from the X-Men movies and Monster's Ball, has not been a particularly memorable actress. Then someone like Ashley Judd, who has more charisma and energy as a charitable activist type than an actress. Just perplexes me. Maybe these actresses' hotness gives them all certain benefits.
MUSICIANS
I have long backed musicians in movie roles. Most of them are pretty good. Rappers in particular have been interesting. Eminem, terrific in 8 Mile. He had real leading man presence, but then again maybe that was because the character was a lot like him. Tupac Shakur seemed to have an at least somewhat promising acting career before he was killed (his last movie had him and Jim Belushi playing dirty cops). 50 Cent was okay in Get Rich or Die Tryin' (a movie I really didn't care for), even if he did mumble his way through it. L.L. Cool J and Jamie Foxx both came into their own and have been very enjoyable. Of course the one we all think of when it comes to rappers turning to acting is the one. The only. Will Smith. The guy gained fame as a rapper, then gained super stardom as a TV star, then was Hollywood royalty as a film actor. Who the hell doesn't love Will Smith? Racists.
Country and rock stars have been so so for the most part. Guys like Gregg Allman (Rush, no band relation) and Keith Richards (Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End) have been good in minor roles. Sting is always memorable as hell; he has true presence, especially as a villain. I know Billy Ray Cyrus and daughter Miley have each dabbled. I actually found Billy Ray to be hilarious in a short cameo as a movie director's wife's lover in Mulholland Dr. a David Lynch movie of course. Speaking of Lynch, Chris Isaak is well known as playing the missing FBI Agent Chester Desmond on the show Twin Peaks and it's movie prequel Fire Walk with Me. Jared Leto, the lead singer for 30 Seconds to Mars, is a terrific and very talented actor. So I guess they are good too in their own ways.
Pop stars are 50/50 and that's all I will say.
WRESTELERS
I surprisingly always back up wrestlers and boxers too. I've always liked Hulk Hogan in movies. I think Roddy Piper was freaking terrific in They Live. Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has pretty much solidified himself as an actor these days and I think that is freaking great. He is really good. He gets shit roles most days, which is unbelievable since movies like The Rundown (one of the best action movies in years), Walking Tall, and The Scorpion King both sealed him in as THE new action hero. Arnold Schwarzeneggar even cameoed for a second in The Rundown and only had one line while passing by The Rock: "Have fun..." I see that as Arnie informally handing over the rank to The Rock. I think it is great. He has great delivery, can actually read a line, and is amazing in action scenes. Give him more cool movies. NOW.
So there's some categories frequently mocked and downtrodden by uppity critics who think if someone doesn't Tom Hanks or Meryl Streep the hell out of a performance it isn't worth seeing. Well they can go to hell, because if you really look at these guys they aren't that bad. They aren't great but they never go Troll 2 = "They're eating her...And then they're gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!"... Yeah. And for that we can be thankful. Then again, The Rock did star in Southland Tales. Bad Rock.
So this has been a post from Your Long Absent Guru. Will try to stick around this time. Try! Thanks for reading.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
I'm Here Review
"It was the best dream in the history of dreams." - Sheldon
I was very interested to see Spike Jonze's short film, I'm Here. It is a half hour independant romance set in an alternate history where robots exist in our time and are almost as common as a regular human, and act about the same. But being a robot can be very lonely, and two in particular find companionship with each other, despite discovering love's hardships.
The story centers on Sheldon, a polite if not timid robot who works at a library. The highlight of his day is when he is able to get a look at another robot, Francesca, driving in her car near his bus stop. Francesca, a free spirited robot, soon befriends him and they quickly fall in love. She shows him how to live really. The drama of the story is brought about by Francesca's clumsiness (a fatal trait of any robot), and Sheldon's subsequent self-sacrifice to help her. Sacrifices that leave one whole and the other barren, but neither unhappy. It is a very sweet story.
I can see this being up for an Oscar in the future. In such a short time, Spike Jonze is able to introduce to us a very simplistic yet fascinating version of our modern world, and one of the most convincing love stories I've seen in awhile. It is a subtle relationship. You may remember my bashing of Twilight's Edward and Bella chemistry. I claimed the majority of it was basically eye gazing. A lot of Sheldon and Francesca's relationship can be developing through their eyes, but they more take notice of each other's features and actions with complete joy as opposed to Twilight's sort of cold adoration. It is not a silent film, the two talk and talk very humanlike to one another. I especially love their conversations about dreams, which robots apparantly cannot do. The actors who voice Sheldon and Francesca, Andrew Garfield and Sienna Guillory, are especially tremendous. They establish great presence though they may not even be there, and with equally great emotion.
The special effects in this are some of the best I have seen in any kind of cinema lately. This is mainly because I can't even clearly define what kind of special effects it is. A part of me thought the robots were made with very well done CGI. I at first thought they were people in suits, and animatronics after that. I think perhaps the whole figures may have been people in suits (very well designed suits) and the only CGI involved were the mouths and eyes (both very human when conveying emotions). The design of the robots is particularly interesting because they aren't all I'Robot techy. Sheldon looks like he made his head out of a used Macintosh from the 90s; while Francesca looks a bit manniquin like. This makes the robots even more realistic. There is even a moment that I think was meant to be sex between the two, but it was done tastefully and in a sweet kind of way (plug ins through the back of the head).
An aspect worth mentioning would be the soundtrack. Just had to say it, the soundtrack was great. The song "There Are Many of Us" by Aska Matsumiya is used very well as a kind of theme song.
So yes, Spike Jonze, who has made great films like Being John Malkovich, Adaptation, and Where the Wild Things Are in his short career, once again proves he is one of the most talented and perhaps underworked American directors. He also wrote this, which earns him even more respect. I don't often watch short films, but I'm Here is one that caught my interest. I very much enjoyed it. It is a subtle and sweet little movie that tugs at the heart strings in poignant ways.
This has been the first short film review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
I was very interested to see Spike Jonze's short film, I'm Here. It is a half hour independant romance set in an alternate history where robots exist in our time and are almost as common as a regular human, and act about the same. But being a robot can be very lonely, and two in particular find companionship with each other, despite discovering love's hardships.
The story centers on Sheldon, a polite if not timid robot who works at a library. The highlight of his day is when he is able to get a look at another robot, Francesca, driving in her car near his bus stop. Francesca, a free spirited robot, soon befriends him and they quickly fall in love. She shows him how to live really. The drama of the story is brought about by Francesca's clumsiness (a fatal trait of any robot), and Sheldon's subsequent self-sacrifice to help her. Sacrifices that leave one whole and the other barren, but neither unhappy. It is a very sweet story.
I can see this being up for an Oscar in the future. In such a short time, Spike Jonze is able to introduce to us a very simplistic yet fascinating version of our modern world, and one of the most convincing love stories I've seen in awhile. It is a subtle relationship. You may remember my bashing of Twilight's Edward and Bella chemistry. I claimed the majority of it was basically eye gazing. A lot of Sheldon and Francesca's relationship can be developing through their eyes, but they more take notice of each other's features and actions with complete joy as opposed to Twilight's sort of cold adoration. It is not a silent film, the two talk and talk very humanlike to one another. I especially love their conversations about dreams, which robots apparantly cannot do. The actors who voice Sheldon and Francesca, Andrew Garfield and Sienna Guillory, are especially tremendous. They establish great presence though they may not even be there, and with equally great emotion.
The special effects in this are some of the best I have seen in any kind of cinema lately. This is mainly because I can't even clearly define what kind of special effects it is. A part of me thought the robots were made with very well done CGI. I at first thought they were people in suits, and animatronics after that. I think perhaps the whole figures may have been people in suits (very well designed suits) and the only CGI involved were the mouths and eyes (both very human when conveying emotions). The design of the robots is particularly interesting because they aren't all I'Robot techy. Sheldon looks like he made his head out of a used Macintosh from the 90s; while Francesca looks a bit manniquin like. This makes the robots even more realistic. There is even a moment that I think was meant to be sex between the two, but it was done tastefully and in a sweet kind of way (plug ins through the back of the head).
An aspect worth mentioning would be the soundtrack. Just had to say it, the soundtrack was great. The song "There Are Many of Us" by Aska Matsumiya is used very well as a kind of theme song.
So yes, Spike Jonze, who has made great films like Being John Malkovich, Adaptation, and Where the Wild Things Are in his short career, once again proves he is one of the most talented and perhaps underworked American directors. He also wrote this, which earns him even more respect. I don't often watch short films, but I'm Here is one that caught my interest. I very much enjoyed it. It is a subtle and sweet little movie that tugs at the heart strings in poignant ways.
This has been the first short film review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
The Underrated: Malcolm McDowell
"Now let's make things nice and sparkling clear..." - Alex DeLarge
As amazing as it must have been, one still has to think that a problem with playing a character as inevitably iconic, and with such greatness, as Alex DeLarge from A Clockwork Orange would be that people might always think of you as Alex DeLarge from A Clockwork Orange. I disagree however, as Malcolm McDowell, the actor who infamously played the sadistic and gleeful Alex, is still a great actor. Now, okay, I'm sure people don't all think of him just as Alex and nothing else and know he is a good actor. Therefore he wouldn't be considered underrated, right? Well, if this were true and he were rated to the amount he should be, he wouldn't be starring in Rob Zombie's Halloween "revisions" and guest acting on Heroes. The last big budget movie he was in was Book of Eli, and while good, that wasn't a wholly great movie (and he was only a cameo near the end).
McDowell's portrayal of Alex reminds me a lot of, and probably inspired a lot of, Heath Ledger's portrayal as The Joker. They both play twisted and relentless men of unspeakable violence and unimaginable joy, violence and joy that the actors seem to be taking and putting their own brand on to an untterly convincing effect. After The Dark Knight, Ledger would no doubt have been showered with other big parts (he was even getting some and completed some during filming) had he not died. One would think the same thing would have happened to Malcolm McDowell, who's character and performance were even greater in many ways. This might not have happened because of the backlash against A Clockwork Orange when it first hit the theatres. It was given an X-rating and banned in England after all. Stanley Kubrick, the visionary director behind the movie, soon rejected the movie and McDowell as well after the negative criticism (Stanley you were a master, but you were also a fucking prick sometimes). So instead of getting Shakespearan roles and big name villains afterward, McDowell got Caligula, a movie that started out a historical epic before morphing into a sleazy and tasteless porno that was later known as one of the most bashed and hated movies of all time.
There were good roles after the initial reaction to ACO, like his creepy part in Cat People, a thriller that is all kinds of strange. He's done some cameo work in raunchy cartoon shows like South Park and Robot Chicken. Most notably though, he took the role once dominated by Donald Pleasance: Dr. Sam Loomis from the Halloween series. Though Zombie's retelling of the first Halloween was pretty damn weak, McDowell was great as Loomis because he played a different kind of Loomis. Don't get me wrong Donald Pleasance's Loomis is perfect and my favorite, but he does come across not at all like a doctor and more of a badass version of that standard old guy in horror movies who goes around moaning "You're doomed. You're all dooooomed!!!" McDowell's Loomis seemed like a believeable child psychiatrist. He cared about his patient, but was later opportunistic when time came to make money off of him and write a book. His later transition to Pleasance's style made sense but didn't feel right. So McDowell did a good job as Dr. Loomis not because he played a big hero but because he played a believeable doctor.
A part I am more impressed with is McDowell's portrayal as one of the main villians of season one of Heroes. McDowell played Daniel Linderman, an Ozymandias type of anti-hero who believes destroying New York City can play a part in bringing the world to a state of peace. I found it ironic he played a villain mainly because his power was healing (not very villainous). Still, in the few times Linderman was there he was one of my favorite characters. He had an air of wisdom and knowledge but at the same time was an obvious manipulator. While on his own level of corruption, McDowell brought some subtle nuances of humanity that really worked. He was a fun character on the show. Fortunately he only starred in the seasons that were really cool, as opposed to the ones that were really bad.
The point is the same as any of these posts: why is this guy underrated? He's a great actor who is never given a role big enough or noticeable enough to show that off. I'm looking forward to watching a movie of his from a few years back called Gangster No. 1, in which he plays an older version of Paul Bettany's hoodlum character. Looks very good. Give Malcolm McDowell good roles, he's an old man it's not like he just needs time to blossom. If you don't, then I say great bolshy yarblockos to you!!!
This has been another edition of the Underrated from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
As amazing as it must have been, one still has to think that a problem with playing a character as inevitably iconic, and with such greatness, as Alex DeLarge from A Clockwork Orange would be that people might always think of you as Alex DeLarge from A Clockwork Orange. I disagree however, as Malcolm McDowell, the actor who infamously played the sadistic and gleeful Alex, is still a great actor. Now, okay, I'm sure people don't all think of him just as Alex and nothing else and know he is a good actor. Therefore he wouldn't be considered underrated, right? Well, if this were true and he were rated to the amount he should be, he wouldn't be starring in Rob Zombie's Halloween "revisions" and guest acting on Heroes. The last big budget movie he was in was Book of Eli, and while good, that wasn't a wholly great movie (and he was only a cameo near the end).
McDowell's portrayal of Alex reminds me a lot of, and probably inspired a lot of, Heath Ledger's portrayal as The Joker. They both play twisted and relentless men of unspeakable violence and unimaginable joy, violence and joy that the actors seem to be taking and putting their own brand on to an untterly convincing effect. After The Dark Knight, Ledger would no doubt have been showered with other big parts (he was even getting some and completed some during filming) had he not died. One would think the same thing would have happened to Malcolm McDowell, who's character and performance were even greater in many ways. This might not have happened because of the backlash against A Clockwork Orange when it first hit the theatres. It was given an X-rating and banned in England after all. Stanley Kubrick, the visionary director behind the movie, soon rejected the movie and McDowell as well after the negative criticism (Stanley you were a master, but you were also a fucking prick sometimes). So instead of getting Shakespearan roles and big name villains afterward, McDowell got Caligula, a movie that started out a historical epic before morphing into a sleazy and tasteless porno that was later known as one of the most bashed and hated movies of all time.
There were good roles after the initial reaction to ACO, like his creepy part in Cat People, a thriller that is all kinds of strange. He's done some cameo work in raunchy cartoon shows like South Park and Robot Chicken. Most notably though, he took the role once dominated by Donald Pleasance: Dr. Sam Loomis from the Halloween series. Though Zombie's retelling of the first Halloween was pretty damn weak, McDowell was great as Loomis because he played a different kind of Loomis. Don't get me wrong Donald Pleasance's Loomis is perfect and my favorite, but he does come across not at all like a doctor and more of a badass version of that standard old guy in horror movies who goes around moaning "You're doomed. You're all dooooomed!!!" McDowell's Loomis seemed like a believeable child psychiatrist. He cared about his patient, but was later opportunistic when time came to make money off of him and write a book. His later transition to Pleasance's style made sense but didn't feel right. So McDowell did a good job as Dr. Loomis not because he played a big hero but because he played a believeable doctor.
A part I am more impressed with is McDowell's portrayal as one of the main villians of season one of Heroes. McDowell played Daniel Linderman, an Ozymandias type of anti-hero who believes destroying New York City can play a part in bringing the world to a state of peace. I found it ironic he played a villain mainly because his power was healing (not very villainous). Still, in the few times Linderman was there he was one of my favorite characters. He had an air of wisdom and knowledge but at the same time was an obvious manipulator. While on his own level of corruption, McDowell brought some subtle nuances of humanity that really worked. He was a fun character on the show. Fortunately he only starred in the seasons that were really cool, as opposed to the ones that were really bad.
The point is the same as any of these posts: why is this guy underrated? He's a great actor who is never given a role big enough or noticeable enough to show that off. I'm looking forward to watching a movie of his from a few years back called Gangster No. 1, in which he plays an older version of Paul Bettany's hoodlum character. Looks very good. Give Malcolm McDowell good roles, he's an old man it's not like he just needs time to blossom. If you don't, then I say great bolshy yarblockos to you!!!
This has been another edition of the Underrated from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
The Scream Lantern
Okay I've watched two new trailers that have just recently come out. And they both originate from very pop culture friendly franchises. The trailer for the superhero movie The Green Lantern, and the fourth installment of the Scream horror series. I will review both.
THE GREEN LANTERN
"Green Lanterns are supposed to be fearless, but I'm not." - Hal Jordan
Okay, so awhile back actor Ryan Reynolds was propositioned to star in the lead of either one of two superhero movies: one was as the classic DC Comics super friend Green Lantern, the other as Marvel Comics' infamous snarky anti-hero Deadpool, whom he played briefly in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. To our disappointment, he went with Green Lantern (I won't give up hope on a Deadpool movie though).
Now watching the trailer for The Green Lantern, I couldn't help but be reminded of a Marvel superhero who was in a movie (actually two) recently. The Human Torch from Fantastic Four. I mean Reynolds plays Hal Jordan, a US military pilot who spends his literal down time slacking, bedding beautiful women, and being a jokester (Flame on!). But when stranded in the desert, Jordan comes into contact with an extraterrestrial spacecract, manned by a wounded member of The Green Lantern Corps. Dying, the alien gives Jordan his ring of power (not the Tolkien one, people) and bestows upon him the title of Green Lantern. Not having enough time to register this dick move, Jordan starts learning of his powers as a GL, meets up with a whole society full of others, finds a nemesis in a strange looking Peter Skarsgaard, and a romance in Blake Lively's character who as near as I can tell is playing a bad actress (drum tap).
I will say that the story looks fairly decent and Reynolds, one of this century's best young actors, is really good and believeable as ever as Green Lantern. And surprisingly the Green Lantern suit, which is completely CGI, was better than I expected. It's not great and it's clearly CG, but it is just better. Most of the CGI I'm seeing in this does look pretty damn stupid. It's straight out of Phantom Menace-land, a term I very often say as of this post. That and... (sigh) Blake Lively. I mean come on, Blake, you just blew me away in The Town, you are a decent albeit sexy actress, you only have two lines in this trailer, and you bring my expectations down 25%? Don't be as bad as this trailer suggests.
So yeah, I may end up seeing this at some point and I may not. It's just iffy for the moment.
Now, onto...
SCREAM 4
"There's something really scary about a guy with a knife who just...snaps." - whoever the hell Kristen Bell is playing
So after another apparantly horrible outing behind the writer and director's with the recent My Soul to Take, sometime horror master Wes Craven teams up with screenwriter Kevin Williamson again for a fourth Scream movie. Before I begin, let me say that I love the Scream trilogy. They are smart, funny, suspenseful, and very intense modern horror movies. I still enjoy the hell out of watching them. That being said, this new movie looks like shit.
The lines presented appear horrible, the acting appears horrible, and whatever story they've tried to hash out appears horrible. They've got most of the principle cast members back: Neve Campbell, David Arquette, Courtney Cox, and the iconic Ghostface voice Roger L. Jackson. None of them feel right. There is also quite a few new additions to the cast of course. Emma Roberts and Hayden Panetierre appear to be either sexy new heroines or cannon fodder for the killer. Kristen Bell and Anna Paquin, both really good actresses, seem to be playing...well, blondes as far as I can tell. Rory Culkin and the lead singer of Crash and the Boys from Scott Pilgrim are playing what I'm calling the Twin Randys, cause all they do is explain the new horror movie survival rules. Adam Brody is here as well, he's usually good, though I don't know if this will help.
So yeah, it looks bad. Unless there's a theatrical trailer that will come out and prove me wrong, I'm gonna be very pissed off about this movie. Why? Because I had high hopes for it, even after My Soul to Take's negative reviews. This looks like a franchise ruiner. Old characters and eye candy aside, it is still probably gonna be horrible. I guess maybe it's because Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson can only have so few successes in the film industry. I mean Wes Craven has made some spectacular films like A Nightmare on Elm St., Serpent and the Rainbow, People Under the Stairs, and Red Eye, but I'm told he's made a lot more bad movies that I was lucky enough to stay away from. And Kevin Williamson was a good writer, but the first two Screams and Dawson's Creek creator credit doesn't save him for Cursed, another Craven fail as well. I mean, goddamn, the trailer looks like a low rent film by the guys who made Meet the Spartans, but like if they were trying to take it seriously. No way, not for me. I just hope I'm wrong and the movie is somehow glorious.
So yeah, check out these trailers and soak em up and see what you think because I know where I stand. One looks decent, one looks disquieting. Have a ball.
This has been some polarized trailer reviewing from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
THE GREEN LANTERN
"Green Lanterns are supposed to be fearless, but I'm not." - Hal Jordan
Okay, so awhile back actor Ryan Reynolds was propositioned to star in the lead of either one of two superhero movies: one was as the classic DC Comics super friend Green Lantern, the other as Marvel Comics' infamous snarky anti-hero Deadpool, whom he played briefly in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. To our disappointment, he went with Green Lantern (I won't give up hope on a Deadpool movie though).
Now watching the trailer for The Green Lantern, I couldn't help but be reminded of a Marvel superhero who was in a movie (actually two) recently. The Human Torch from Fantastic Four. I mean Reynolds plays Hal Jordan, a US military pilot who spends his literal down time slacking, bedding beautiful women, and being a jokester (Flame on!). But when stranded in the desert, Jordan comes into contact with an extraterrestrial spacecract, manned by a wounded member of The Green Lantern Corps. Dying, the alien gives Jordan his ring of power (not the Tolkien one, people) and bestows upon him the title of Green Lantern. Not having enough time to register this dick move, Jordan starts learning of his powers as a GL, meets up with a whole society full of others, finds a nemesis in a strange looking Peter Skarsgaard, and a romance in Blake Lively's character who as near as I can tell is playing a bad actress (drum tap).
I will say that the story looks fairly decent and Reynolds, one of this century's best young actors, is really good and believeable as ever as Green Lantern. And surprisingly the Green Lantern suit, which is completely CGI, was better than I expected. It's not great and it's clearly CG, but it is just better. Most of the CGI I'm seeing in this does look pretty damn stupid. It's straight out of Phantom Menace-land, a term I very often say as of this post. That and... (sigh) Blake Lively. I mean come on, Blake, you just blew me away in The Town, you are a decent albeit sexy actress, you only have two lines in this trailer, and you bring my expectations down 25%? Don't be as bad as this trailer suggests.
So yeah, I may end up seeing this at some point and I may not. It's just iffy for the moment.
Now, onto...
SCREAM 4
"There's something really scary about a guy with a knife who just...snaps." - whoever the hell Kristen Bell is playing
So after another apparantly horrible outing behind the writer and director's with the recent My Soul to Take, sometime horror master Wes Craven teams up with screenwriter Kevin Williamson again for a fourth Scream movie. Before I begin, let me say that I love the Scream trilogy. They are smart, funny, suspenseful, and very intense modern horror movies. I still enjoy the hell out of watching them. That being said, this new movie looks like shit.
The lines presented appear horrible, the acting appears horrible, and whatever story they've tried to hash out appears horrible. They've got most of the principle cast members back: Neve Campbell, David Arquette, Courtney Cox, and the iconic Ghostface voice Roger L. Jackson. None of them feel right. There is also quite a few new additions to the cast of course. Emma Roberts and Hayden Panetierre appear to be either sexy new heroines or cannon fodder for the killer. Kristen Bell and Anna Paquin, both really good actresses, seem to be playing...well, blondes as far as I can tell. Rory Culkin and the lead singer of Crash and the Boys from Scott Pilgrim are playing what I'm calling the Twin Randys, cause all they do is explain the new horror movie survival rules. Adam Brody is here as well, he's usually good, though I don't know if this will help.
So yeah, it looks bad. Unless there's a theatrical trailer that will come out and prove me wrong, I'm gonna be very pissed off about this movie. Why? Because I had high hopes for it, even after My Soul to Take's negative reviews. This looks like a franchise ruiner. Old characters and eye candy aside, it is still probably gonna be horrible. I guess maybe it's because Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson can only have so few successes in the film industry. I mean Wes Craven has made some spectacular films like A Nightmare on Elm St., Serpent and the Rainbow, People Under the Stairs, and Red Eye, but I'm told he's made a lot more bad movies that I was lucky enough to stay away from. And Kevin Williamson was a good writer, but the first two Screams and Dawson's Creek creator credit doesn't save him for Cursed, another Craven fail as well. I mean, goddamn, the trailer looks like a low rent film by the guys who made Meet the Spartans, but like if they were trying to take it seriously. No way, not for me. I just hope I'm wrong and the movie is somehow glorious.
So yeah, check out these trailers and soak em up and see what you think because I know where I stand. One looks decent, one looks disquieting. Have a ball.
This has been some polarized trailer reviewing from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear thoughts
"We live in hard times, not end times." - Jon Stewart
For those...I don't know, two of you wondering why Your Modest Guru hasn't been posting lately and missed his Halloween themed posts, I will have you know I was recuperating after a long vacation. This vacation is one that brought me to many states I had yet to visit, but my primary missions on the trip, and that of the captain of the trip, my grandfather, was to make it for Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert's Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear in Washington D.C. and then straight down to Florida to watch the Discovery space shuttle launch for its last time. Unfortunately we were only able to see one of those happen and that was the rally (typical NASA wasting my time with bah! safety measures).
Possibly in a parody to Political Media mogul and lunatic Glenn Beck's Rally to Restore Honor (no, no that's not a joke) as well as Al Sharpton's retaliation against Beck with his Reclaim the Dream rally, Jon Stewart had been planning a rally for people to get together and sort of just weed out all of the drama, all of the bullshit, all of the insanity that plagues this country every damn day. Stephen Colbert co-hosted in his satirical right wing persona as the man presenting the arguement for fear mongering in America (the Glenn Becks, if you will). As I am told, Stewart and Colbert expected a turnout of at 100, 000 to 150,000 people at the most to show up in the National Mall. It ended up being approximately 215,000 people, the ones who could make it, of course.
I was in the thick of it and it was quite a sight. It was a collection of people of numerous ethnicities, religions, and cultures, all together, tolerant and peaceful with each other. I suppose I shouldn't go into too much detail, seeing as how I had very long range view of one of the jumbotrons, my whole body was worn out from standing up so long, and summaries of the rally can be found from numerous internet sources. Still I will get my thoughts out there.
First off the musical guests were all top notch people. From the rally long performance of The Roots (with John Legend in the beginning) to the trio performance of Kid Rock, Sheryl Crow, and a recorded T.I., they were all wonderful. My favorite instance would most definitely have to be the unconventional duet of Yusuf Islam (formerly Cat Stevens) and Ossie Osbourne, playing back to back and back again their respective songs Peace Train (for Stewart's side) and Crazy Train (for Colbert's side); and The OJs following up with Love Train just topped it off. And though the music was good, it did seem to drag on a little too much (the opening act especially), but then again that's how I feel at concerts. Yes I know, I'm stupid. Still dragging or not, the music and the performers were top notch.
The comedy, which is what I imagine people were waiting for during the music, was very good. Stewart and Colbert can come off as cheesy out of their television element, but they are still very funny and clever. And the guests, ranging from Sam Waterson and his reading of Colbert's fear poem to the beloved R2-D2, were all stellar. The Sanity/Fear Awards were certainly entertaining. A couple of my favorite moments were when Anderson Cooper's tight T-shirt was awarded as well as the Qu'ran rescuing hippie from our latest 9/11's proposed Burn a Qu'ran Day (I love that the guy tossed his award into the crowd). Then of course the basis for the whole damn rally, the sanity against fear warfare between Stewart and Colbert. Colbert had some of the biggest highlights including his montage of media based fear mongering and his Fearzilla puppet that attacked the stage, defeated with the Pan-like assistance of hilarious Stewart co-host John Oliver. And who can forget for the rest of their days Stewart and Colbert's absolutely horrible attempt to sing their own song, The Greatest, Strongest Country in the World. The signs were also funny, and there were plenty of signs. My favorite one, and arguably one of the most simple, read "Calm the F*ck Down." Glorious.
The main highlight of the event was no doubt Jon Stewart's final speech to the massive crowd. It was from the heart and made plenty of sense. In tumultuous times like these, people should not be so bent on rocking the boat or just acting crazy or stupid. This get together was obviously important to him and turned out far greater than he ever expected.
The rally as a whole was an unregretable experience. It was amazing being there and the feeling that people were that ready to be good to one another and not try to get vicious about anything. It is true indeed that in a time when so much badness is going on that a bunch of us sane Americans can get together and say tell the world to Calm the F*ck Down. For a guy like me, it could be one of those once in a lifetime things, so I am no doubt holding this as a dear memory. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go through the rally crowd photos and see if I can find myself. Haha, just kidding...or am I? Yes.
This has been a return from another freaking long absence from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading, especially since my next post will more than likely have to unwrapped on Christmas.
For those...I don't know, two of you wondering why Your Modest Guru hasn't been posting lately and missed his Halloween themed posts, I will have you know I was recuperating after a long vacation. This vacation is one that brought me to many states I had yet to visit, but my primary missions on the trip, and that of the captain of the trip, my grandfather, was to make it for Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert's Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear in Washington D.C. and then straight down to Florida to watch the Discovery space shuttle launch for its last time. Unfortunately we were only able to see one of those happen and that was the rally (typical NASA wasting my time with bah! safety measures).
Possibly in a parody to Political Media mogul and lunatic Glenn Beck's Rally to Restore Honor (no, no that's not a joke) as well as Al Sharpton's retaliation against Beck with his Reclaim the Dream rally, Jon Stewart had been planning a rally for people to get together and sort of just weed out all of the drama, all of the bullshit, all of the insanity that plagues this country every damn day. Stephen Colbert co-hosted in his satirical right wing persona as the man presenting the arguement for fear mongering in America (the Glenn Becks, if you will). As I am told, Stewart and Colbert expected a turnout of at 100, 000 to 150,000 people at the most to show up in the National Mall. It ended up being approximately 215,000 people, the ones who could make it, of course.
I was in the thick of it and it was quite a sight. It was a collection of people of numerous ethnicities, religions, and cultures, all together, tolerant and peaceful with each other. I suppose I shouldn't go into too much detail, seeing as how I had very long range view of one of the jumbotrons, my whole body was worn out from standing up so long, and summaries of the rally can be found from numerous internet sources. Still I will get my thoughts out there.
First off the musical guests were all top notch people. From the rally long performance of The Roots (with John Legend in the beginning) to the trio performance of Kid Rock, Sheryl Crow, and a recorded T.I., they were all wonderful. My favorite instance would most definitely have to be the unconventional duet of Yusuf Islam (formerly Cat Stevens) and Ossie Osbourne, playing back to back and back again their respective songs Peace Train (for Stewart's side) and Crazy Train (for Colbert's side); and The OJs following up with Love Train just topped it off. And though the music was good, it did seem to drag on a little too much (the opening act especially), but then again that's how I feel at concerts. Yes I know, I'm stupid. Still dragging or not, the music and the performers were top notch.
The comedy, which is what I imagine people were waiting for during the music, was very good. Stewart and Colbert can come off as cheesy out of their television element, but they are still very funny and clever. And the guests, ranging from Sam Waterson and his reading of Colbert's fear poem to the beloved R2-D2, were all stellar. The Sanity/Fear Awards were certainly entertaining. A couple of my favorite moments were when Anderson Cooper's tight T-shirt was awarded as well as the Qu'ran rescuing hippie from our latest 9/11's proposed Burn a Qu'ran Day (I love that the guy tossed his award into the crowd). Then of course the basis for the whole damn rally, the sanity against fear warfare between Stewart and Colbert. Colbert had some of the biggest highlights including his montage of media based fear mongering and his Fearzilla puppet that attacked the stage, defeated with the Pan-like assistance of hilarious Stewart co-host John Oliver. And who can forget for the rest of their days Stewart and Colbert's absolutely horrible attempt to sing their own song, The Greatest, Strongest Country in the World. The signs were also funny, and there were plenty of signs. My favorite one, and arguably one of the most simple, read "Calm the F*ck Down." Glorious.
The main highlight of the event was no doubt Jon Stewart's final speech to the massive crowd. It was from the heart and made plenty of sense. In tumultuous times like these, people should not be so bent on rocking the boat or just acting crazy or stupid. This get together was obviously important to him and turned out far greater than he ever expected.
The rally as a whole was an unregretable experience. It was amazing being there and the feeling that people were that ready to be good to one another and not try to get vicious about anything. It is true indeed that in a time when so much badness is going on that a bunch of us sane Americans can get together and say tell the world to Calm the F*ck Down. For a guy like me, it could be one of those once in a lifetime things, so I am no doubt holding this as a dear memory. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go through the rally crowd photos and see if I can find myself. Haha, just kidding...or am I? Yes.
This has been a return from another freaking long absence from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading, especially since my next post will more than likely have to unwrapped on Christmas.
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