Okay, I know. I know I said I was gonna do another one on the anniversary of the show's end. But it was requested, the anniversary of its beginning was only awhile ago, and I'm always up for one. With that here is a new Lost post. This time I will do something that has always been part of the joy of watching the show: theorize. Since so many people could not answer so many questions themselves - even when those questions were clearly answered or you could come up with your own logical explanation if you used your head - I will give you my theories on some of the things that weren't completely spelled out for those less intelligent or easily confused fans... and some that were.
1. The Cabin
This is one that confuses people still, even though I think its simple. In Season 3 we were introduced to what we believed to be Jacob's lair: a small, isolated cabin in the woods. As Locke and Ben went into the cabin, white ash was found to surround it and inside was empty. Once the two started arguing inside over the validity of Jacob's existence, the cabin started shaking, sounds of the Smoke Monster erupted, and a man was briefly seen inside (he also asked Locke for help). After escaping the cabin, Locke and Ben believed it was Jacob.
My theory: it was not Jacob. It was actually his nemesis, The Man in Black. I'm guessing Jacob used the cabin between the 80s and 90s as one of his hideouts (along with the cave on the cove and the Foot Statue). Jacob probably abandoned the cabin when Oceanic 815 crashed, knowing the survivors would be searching through the jungle. With Jacob retreating to the Statue, The Man in Black found an opening inside the cabin and used it as part of his ploy to mislead Locke, Ben, and the rest. Evidence: the man we saw briefly inside both times looked more like MIB than Jacob (and at one point he had Christian Shepherd's corpse in the rocking chair); there were smoke sounds surrounding the cabin when everything went crazy; MIB was of course seen operating out of there for awhile; the ash around the cabin clearly meant Jacob was hiding there originally.
2. The Numbers
No introductions are really needed. Hurley's backstory primarily involved his lottery winning numbers that he believed to be cursed. The numbers were even showing up all over the show before and after that. Eventually the numbers were revealed to be Jacob's six last candidates for a new Protector of the Island, one of whom was Hurley.
My theory: the numbers were a sign. Jacob's sign. They appeared everywhere for a reason. The numbers showed up in the lives of every character, Hurley was just the only one who noticed. them. They were either two things: a) a calling from Jacob that beckoned people to The Island, or b) a mark that set a chain of events that would lead the candidates to The Island, seeing as how bad things usually happened when the numbers were seen, and not just with Hurley. I think it could be both actually. Perhaps Hurley being the only one who knew there was something more behind the numbers was a measure of his candidacy.
3. What was with that talking bird and polar bears
This frustrates me because, like most of the unanswered questions, it is best solved by piecing things together. Yes, a few of the "mysteries" out of the many of mind boggling mysteries of Lost was what were strange animals doing on the Island, including polar bears and a bird believed to have talked.
My theory: I barely registered the so called "talking bird" in either scene it was in. Yes, in a few instances there was a bird thought to have called out the names of characters as it flew by. I think it was the season 1 finale where it was believed to have called out Locke's name, and then in the season 2 finale where it apparently shrieked "Hurley!", even Hurley thought so (because Hurley notices everything of course). I knew what the polar bears were after season 4. I think they were mainly used by the Dharma Initiative as experiments and then eventually messengers to test the power of The Wheel, that teleported people through space and time. If you want a little more elaboration watch the Lost epilogue.
4. Libby
Oh, Libby. What a great character you could have been. Yes after her shocking and unexpected death half way through her first season, and the level of mystery still surrounding her, there was much spectulation about who Libby was before The Island. There was even a long time theory that she was a part of the Dharma Initiative. I had my weird theories but it was probably pretty simple in the end.
My theory: Before season 6 I was getting the feeling that we'd never have closure for Libby, and just randomly theorized that she was Jacob's illegitimate daughter. How's that for major father issues? But Libby probably was only a victim of circumstance. Maybe she was just mentally unstable at one point. Maybe it was because of her husband's death. Maybe she was cured and that inspired her to be a therapist. Maybe she was, like many others killed on Lost, an innocent bystander who got on the wrong plane.
5. The importance of Walt and Aaron
There was much ambiguity around two primary children on the show, Walt Lloyd and Aaron Littleton. Walt had for most of his life been seen as "different" or "special", and many times it was clear he could do things beyond the limits of possibility, i.e. birds falling dead when he's angry, and an overall ability to sort of will things to happen. It was never really touched on but always a big mystery. Then there was Aaron who was an enigma even before birth. A psychic told Claire that she could not let anyone else raise him but her alone and later changed his mind and told her to get on doomed Flight 815 to meet people who would raise him. This left people wondering if the psychic knew what would happen.
My theory: I will get Aaron out of the way first by saying that, even though I think he could be a future candidate along with Ji Yeon, the psychic was probably only lying. He may have known that Claire was giving up the baby and made her hold off on it until he could secure a deal with a couple in America, no doubt for a large check. In one flashback, the psychic told Mr. Eko he was a fake. So, even though I think Jacob had a hand in stalling Claire's adoption process, I ultimately think that evidence shows that whether or not Claire raised Aaron would not have made much difference, except maybe helping her keep her sanity after she was left behind. However, Walt is a bit like Desmond and Hurley, except he has greater potential. Desmond had a unique resistance and almost fluidic nature with the Island's energy which allowed his consciousness to travel through time and in some cases through life itself. Hurley could see and interact with the dead. Walt, in a very miniscule and untrained way, could alter reality. If trained he could do great things, perhaps even be what the Island has needed for so long, instead of worthy but flawed Protectors. In the end, I think out of all of the numerous candidates, Walt is THE candidate.
6. The Man in Black's role throughout
Now that the show is all over we know what Lost's highly deceptive and lethal antagonist's true goal was throughout the series (or at least what he had planned up until he was able to escape The Island), but really how much deception was there. He was doing plenty of shady things as the Smoke Monster before we even knew what he was. For those who were wondering what he had been doing in all of his appearances before he set his long con into overdrive during Season 5, here's what I came up with.
My theory: After his failure at making Richard, Robert Rousseau, and possibly many others his personal assassins, The Man in Black saw potential in a damaged little boy within The Dharma Initiative named Ben Linus. MIB drew him toward The Others where he would be groomed into a ruthless operative, and an eventual recruit as such. He was no doubt planning his last great scheme soon after Oceanic 815 crashed. Perhaps, he saw the passengers as more potential Jacob followers he could slaughter. That's what I think happened in the cockpit during the first episode. He tried to kill the gang of castaways, only succeeding in offing the pilot, and more than likely would have killed Jack until he saw Jack was Candidate 23, thus realizing that the other candidates had arrived too. His next move came when he encountered John Locke, Candidate 4, hunting for boar a few days later. Upon doing a quick scan of who he was, MIB realized Locke was damaged, curious, gullible, and malleable, and knew he would be come in handy. He nearly got Jack killed when posing as his father Christian, whose body he preserved in the now abandoned cabin. I think this was planned so Locke could gain leadership and influence over the castaways and thus be more useful. After failing to capture and recruit Locke and realizing his fate was faltering upon entering the Hatch, MIB turned his sights to another flawed man of faith, Mr. Eko. Posing as Eko's brother, MIB tried to use him to do either two things: a) further drive Locke to not press the button and destroy The Island, Jacob, and the candidates, or b) become another potential recruit/assassin. Both failed because of Desmond's brave interference and Eko's unwillingness to bend to MIB/his brother's will. Finally he turned all of his focus on Locke and Ben. The chain of events in seasons 3 and 4 allowed MIB to convince Ben and Locke to turn The Wheel, taking them off The Island and setting in motion his plan to kill Jacob. We know where it goes from there. As for what he would do when he left The Island, a big part of me thinks he was planning to recruit or kill everyone. Either way, none of this matters now. He's thankfully very dead.
7. Eloise Hawking
Though she was often presented as a former high ranking Other, there was still clearly a lot more to her than just that. She appeared to have a sort of omniscience, especially when dealing with Desmond. We first met Eloise when Desmond mind jumped back to the 90 where he was gonna marry Penny. Here she seemed to have a knowledge of time travel, course correction, what would eventually happen. She was even completely self aware of the flash-sideways environment. All things that were left unexplained. Yeah, that bugs me too. While people were still wondering what was up with the polar bears in the final season, I was wondering what was up with her.
My theory: During the series, Desmond's union with The Island put him on an extraordinary plane of being only a few other characters could share (in different ways of course). While Desmond's extreme ability fragmented his consciousness and soul through time and space and even through life and death, Eloise may have had the same thing, but instead of fragments she had clarity. Meaning she could not glimpse random future so much as she could see definite courses or destinies. And instead of having a hazy, quick meeting with the place between life and afterlife, she could have as much free range knowledge there as she could have while alive. Did this make any sense?
8. The Rules
Okay, The Rules were always a frustrating concept for me. Mainly because they were the most easily changed rules imaginable. Maybe Island leaders construct The Rules much like a game of Senet (the board game Jacob and The Man in Black played as children) where there are no specifiic rules. Here's how I have classified them.
My theory: Okay, in actuality there were about three different sets of Rules on the show: there were Jacob's Rules, The Others' Rules, and The Sideways Rules.
Jacob: his rules are apparently limited to the power any Protector of the Isalnd is granted. The one thing I've noticed more than anything is that a Protector's word may as well be god. Where basically they can bend the rules of fate that bind people. Essentially you can be like "hey you, you can't kill that person" and you can't; "hey you, you can't kill yourself" and you can't; "hey you, don't age" and you get Richard. Once these things are said they are rules and can't be broken by those that they are specifically given to. Also, a Protector can change the rules to choose who can become a Protector that will have as much freedoms as the previous. Very confusing
The Others: Others' society and politics was very confusing in general; I mean you got the neighborly, proper Barracks section, the isolated and ruthless Temple section, and the random cold calculating operatives section. Their rules are most likely ones that began as Jacob's but were very likely manipulated by any of the coldblooded leaders of the society. They are not allowed to kill each other and family is especially off limits during personal quarrels between each other. A big part of Jacob's philosophy was proving that people can be just as good as they can be evil, but every new era of The Others doesn't abide by that. They label their enemies as bad and their allies or assets as good, even if it is the other way around, and most I've seen are highly amoral. The Others' Rules are often changed but the larger ones are still passed down from Jacob and, even though they are very loose, the principal Others still obey and try to appease Jacob. Still very confusing.
Sideways Rules: these were probably the most simple, even if not completely explained. The Sideways Universe, or Afterlife or Purgatory or whatever, is pretty much a construct that allows people to face who they were in life, all of the good and bad, hopes and dreams and cruel realities presented in a literally timeless scenario. Judging how they handle this situation determines whether or not they realize that their life ended and they have to move on. Some within are aware of what is going on and wish to preserve whatever happiness they've found. I think The Rules here basically boil down to free will. If those who are content with this reality, whether or not they know it is false, they can remain oblivious and just run with it, but prove that they can't let go of their past. For those who accept who they were and the lives they led, they can let go and move on to be one with The Heart of the Island, what I call the source of human essence (I'll get to that in a moment). Either way all of these Rules are confusing as hell and are really just there for plot convenience a lot of times.
9. What was The Island
Oh this has been the big question for, like, the entire series. I honestly didn't think there was anything up with The Island itself for a long time, just that there were some crazy things on it. But huge pockets of electromagnetism underneath can get the mind working just a little bit. So essentially this was, along with the Afterlife, explained well enough for me. My problem was that it was explained a bit too late. A part of me thinks that 'Across the Sea' should have been midway through the last season like 'Ab Aeterno' instead of just two episodes before the finale. I don't think the whole explanation for what is so important about the Island had enough time to sink in, but it still worked for me mostly. I mean it was a bit too simple and really meaningful at the same time.
My theory: not really a theory as much as it is me building on what Jacob's Mother said. While Jacob looked at the Island during his time as a prison for his evil twin (wow this sounds really cheesy when reading out loud), Mother explains it is a place that holds a Source of energy that the keeps stability in the whole world. Within this source is what I call life's essence. The Source's light shines in every person, a little slice of heaven it would seem. If close enough, like on The Island, it's energy resonates with some. It can heal, enlighten, influence, and even change people. But when people find it they want more, which leads to either total corruption or destruction. It's kind of like the apple tree in the Garden of Eden; the light can only be given, but if you try to take it you ruin everything. If the Source is interrupted and the light put out the essence is gone from all life and The Island goes down, no doubt followed by everything else. So, to sum it up, The Island holds everything together. Don't screw with it. Keep the light on!
10. What did it all mean
The most important question is what was the true meaning of Lost, the show in all of its aspects. There really can't be a mythology as big as this and not have a spectulated meaning. The truth is there are many and it is ultimately left to the sole viewer to decide.
My theory: I'm not telling you... yet. This post is already way too long and taken up a lot of my worthless time. I'd rather end it now. Don't worry I will get to what I thought it meant in due time, along with a few other Lost articles of course. So in the meantime, if you watched the show, what do you think it meant? Comment or tell me elsewhere, you little fan girl. That's all I got for now though.
This is Your Modest Guru fully illustrating his nerdiness, or Lostness, again. Thanks for reading and Namaste.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
brought to you by the letter K
"You! Your sex is on fire!" - Kings of Leon
I felt I should mention a little something about singer Katy Perry's recent appearance on Sesame Street alongside childhood icon, Elmo. I will try to sum up what happened, but if I don't know certain things or anything its because I haven't seen Sesame Street in ages. This skit features Perry and Elmo having a little bit of playtime around the colorful Sesame Street... and then the desert... and then Antarctica. Basically the entire thing is a clean and fun rendition of her Hot N Cold song. I must admit I kind of enjoyed this skit. I mean it has all of the playfulness of Sesame Street. Elmo dancing to the pop beat is funny as hell in it; I even think Oscar pops out of his can at one point to yell at Perry. Really it is all the same on both ends, the long lasting Sesame Street is just as fun lovingly wild and innocent as always, and the apparently Christian musician Katy Perry is just as ambiguous and eccentric as always. Now, Perry showing up alongside Elmo has been criticised by critics and parents alike for a particular reason: Katy Perry is too freaking hot.
Seriously? No, but for real, I can understand where these people are coming from to a point. However the only thing I can really see being wrong is that her skirt is a bit too short and she is showing some cleavage, which is what you can expect from Perry and essentially any other modern 21st Century girl under the age of 55. It really could have been worse, America. She could have gone all California Gurls, spraying cans of whip cream from her breasts with diasy dukes and a bikini on top (or nothing at all if you watched the music video... not saying that I have, of course... many times...). So yeah, it could have been much worse. The way Perry dresses, that weird but nevertheless sexy attire, is just the way she rolls and we really can't judge her too much, not for that at least. I saw an older episode of Sesame Street that featured Robert De Niro talking to Elmo about acting, which transitioned into De Niro looking like Elmo and the two laughing. I love the hell out of Robert De Niro but that was a little disturbing, not because of the roles he has played in the past but because of the idea of De Niro acting all playful like with ELMO. De Niro's work didn't reflect on himself no more than Perry's has.
Though there are moments in the skit when I was a bit put off. I think Elmo was actually the first one to be a little uneasy about Perry's appearance. Either that or the video made it seem like he was really confused sexually and socially. As soon as Perry shows up, Elmo gets all flustered and even more uncomfortable when she starts suggesting "dress up" until he eventually runs away. Cut to music video section, where Elmo seems to be doing anything from dancing to run around Perry in a shot that seemed to suggest he was looking up her skirt (I'm just telling it like I saw it). At the very end, he forgets all about everything that happened before and starts playing tag. (Parents note: no lewd content was featured in the video. Nor was any actual "dress up" seen at any point) This skit was just really weird and confused it seemed. Though, looking back, a lot Sesame Street was like that. It is after all a show where playful little handpuppet monsters, a giant bird, and a man sized elephant all interact on an inner city street. Katy Perry showing up only ices the cake slightly more than it already is (anyone making jokes about that last sentence should can pat yourself on the back for being as childish as me).
In the end it comes down to the children. I will think of the children! Personally, I don't think this will affect them much, if at all. I'd wager the kids watching Sesame Street are between 1 and 5, they should be moving on to stylized violent cartoon shows and Americanized Japanese animes after that. And at that age, the fact that a woman shows up on the show whose style does not hide her bustiness should not even be subliminal for a kid. At this stage all grownups just sort of blend. So really no harm done yet. Really, one way or another your kids are gonna get wise to modern styles and personalities. So it really doesn't matter whether they learn it from Sesame Street now or E later, those little sponges are gonna soak up some dirt.
So ultimately, if you couldn't tell, I don't think that Katy Perry shocked some audience by revealing to kids those things that we almost immediately expose and shove in their faces is controversial. I only really have two criticisms. 1, Katy Perry needs to learn to act just a little bit; I know it's only Sesame Street, but there could have been some effort to be good (oh well not everybody can do it. I'm talking to you, Sofia Coppola). And 2, there wasn't enough Oscar. It's just a given, in my mind.
This has been some strange news mixed with nostalgia from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
I felt I should mention a little something about singer Katy Perry's recent appearance on Sesame Street alongside childhood icon, Elmo. I will try to sum up what happened, but if I don't know certain things or anything its because I haven't seen Sesame Street in ages. This skit features Perry and Elmo having a little bit of playtime around the colorful Sesame Street... and then the desert... and then Antarctica. Basically the entire thing is a clean and fun rendition of her Hot N Cold song. I must admit I kind of enjoyed this skit. I mean it has all of the playfulness of Sesame Street. Elmo dancing to the pop beat is funny as hell in it; I even think Oscar pops out of his can at one point to yell at Perry. Really it is all the same on both ends, the long lasting Sesame Street is just as fun lovingly wild and innocent as always, and the apparently Christian musician Katy Perry is just as ambiguous and eccentric as always. Now, Perry showing up alongside Elmo has been criticised by critics and parents alike for a particular reason: Katy Perry is too freaking hot.
Seriously? No, but for real, I can understand where these people are coming from to a point. However the only thing I can really see being wrong is that her skirt is a bit too short and she is showing some cleavage, which is what you can expect from Perry and essentially any other modern 21st Century girl under the age of 55. It really could have been worse, America. She could have gone all California Gurls, spraying cans of whip cream from her breasts with diasy dukes and a bikini on top (or nothing at all if you watched the music video... not saying that I have, of course... many times...). So yeah, it could have been much worse. The way Perry dresses, that weird but nevertheless sexy attire, is just the way she rolls and we really can't judge her too much, not for that at least. I saw an older episode of Sesame Street that featured Robert De Niro talking to Elmo about acting, which transitioned into De Niro looking like Elmo and the two laughing. I love the hell out of Robert De Niro but that was a little disturbing, not because of the roles he has played in the past but because of the idea of De Niro acting all playful like with ELMO. De Niro's work didn't reflect on himself no more than Perry's has.
Though there are moments in the skit when I was a bit put off. I think Elmo was actually the first one to be a little uneasy about Perry's appearance. Either that or the video made it seem like he was really confused sexually and socially. As soon as Perry shows up, Elmo gets all flustered and even more uncomfortable when she starts suggesting "dress up" until he eventually runs away. Cut to music video section, where Elmo seems to be doing anything from dancing to run around Perry in a shot that seemed to suggest he was looking up her skirt (I'm just telling it like I saw it). At the very end, he forgets all about everything that happened before and starts playing tag. (Parents note: no lewd content was featured in the video. Nor was any actual "dress up" seen at any point) This skit was just really weird and confused it seemed. Though, looking back, a lot Sesame Street was like that. It is after all a show where playful little handpuppet monsters, a giant bird, and a man sized elephant all interact on an inner city street. Katy Perry showing up only ices the cake slightly more than it already is (anyone making jokes about that last sentence should can pat yourself on the back for being as childish as me).
In the end it comes down to the children. I will think of the children! Personally, I don't think this will affect them much, if at all. I'd wager the kids watching Sesame Street are between 1 and 5, they should be moving on to stylized violent cartoon shows and Americanized Japanese animes after that. And at that age, the fact that a woman shows up on the show whose style does not hide her bustiness should not even be subliminal for a kid. At this stage all grownups just sort of blend. So really no harm done yet. Really, one way or another your kids are gonna get wise to modern styles and personalities. So it really doesn't matter whether they learn it from Sesame Street now or E later, those little sponges are gonna soak up some dirt.
So ultimately, if you couldn't tell, I don't think that Katy Perry shocked some audience by revealing to kids those things that we almost immediately expose and shove in their faces is controversial. I only really have two criticisms. 1, Katy Perry needs to learn to act just a little bit; I know it's only Sesame Street, but there could have been some effort to be good (oh well not everybody can do it. I'm talking to you, Sofia Coppola). And 2, there wasn't enough Oscar. It's just a given, in my mind.
This has been some strange news mixed with nostalgia from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Joaquin yo ass!
"A mind is a terrible thing to waste." - various people
I can remember first reading the news that Joaquin Phoenix was planning to retire from acting. I was very disappointed and confused. Then after his infamous appearance on Letterman, where he was overweight, grizzly, obnoxious, and antisocial, I was totally bewildered. Then shockingly more bewildered when I heard he was quitting acting to pursue a career in hip hop. Finally, I was absolutely convinced he'd suffered a mental breakdown when I actually heard him rap. It was almost too crazy. And thankfully it was, because Phoenix didn't quit acting. In fact, he was doing the most challenging act of his life.
Yes readers, Your Modest Guru wasn't the only talented, mysterious, and handsome celebrity to return to the scene recently. Turns out the freaky new Joaquin Phoenix of recent memory was an elaborate acting venture that Phoenix and friend, brother-in-law, and fellow actor Casey Affleck were responsible for. I'm not sure what the purpose was then Phoenix and Affleck were hoping for some kind of virtuoso acting experience undercover in Hollywood, as well as sort of observing society thrown into a state of chaos over one man's apparently shattered stability. Well it worked on me, though I refused to believe it for awhile. But it only proves how great of an actor Joaquin Phoenix really is, because he really sold his performance as himself.
This plot by the two actors bottomed out into a documentary (a feaux documentary as of late) about Phoenix's "self-destruction" titled I'm Still Here. When I first saw promos for the film, I was even more confused about what Phoenix was doing. I mean sure the film would showcase his misery and deterioration, but then again he said he was done with movies. Either way, I didn't see it but I heard it was pretty good, especially at convincing folks that this thing going on with him was real.
Thankfully though, this whole thing was only a new acting method conceived by two actors/actor brothers who, for the most part, successfully executed a pledge, turn, and prestige. I was very glad to see him return to Letterman recently where he was thin, clean cut, and very presentable. Letterman's reaction was also good. Even though throughout this little project I was convinced that a man with so much talent, with incredible performances in movies such as Walk the Line, Gladiator, and We Own the Night, and whose own brother, River Phoenix, a young actor with much promise, had led a self destructive lifestyle (ending with River dead in a gutter) could transform like this. Not to mention, his rap was just embarrassing to watch; imagine his Johnny Cash singing voice juxtaposed with hip hop rhythm and posturing that makes 50 Cent look downplayed. But no, he wasn't totally insane, he just convinced us he was. Now that I think about it, Phoenix and Casey Affleck are really quite genius. I mean, how often does something truly surprising emerge from the Hollywood limelight these days? Joaquin Phoenix's breakdown was more fascinating than Paris Hilton getting a, like, week in lockup for carrying a bag of coke. Nearly all reality TV is fabricated and just bullshit, and very transparent when it is. Phoenix and Affleck were making doing the same thing, but it was not transparent in the slightest. In fact it did what most reality TV fails at: it convinced us it was reality.
Anywho, I look forward to whatever work Phoenix has planned now that his rap career clearly went nowhere. It's good to have him back. And for his performance, I must say: bravo, you sly dog.
This has been a new post from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
I can remember first reading the news that Joaquin Phoenix was planning to retire from acting. I was very disappointed and confused. Then after his infamous appearance on Letterman, where he was overweight, grizzly, obnoxious, and antisocial, I was totally bewildered. Then shockingly more bewildered when I heard he was quitting acting to pursue a career in hip hop. Finally, I was absolutely convinced he'd suffered a mental breakdown when I actually heard him rap. It was almost too crazy. And thankfully it was, because Phoenix didn't quit acting. In fact, he was doing the most challenging act of his life.
Yes readers, Your Modest Guru wasn't the only talented, mysterious, and handsome celebrity to return to the scene recently. Turns out the freaky new Joaquin Phoenix of recent memory was an elaborate acting venture that Phoenix and friend, brother-in-law, and fellow actor Casey Affleck were responsible for. I'm not sure what the purpose was then Phoenix and Affleck were hoping for some kind of virtuoso acting experience undercover in Hollywood, as well as sort of observing society thrown into a state of chaos over one man's apparently shattered stability. Well it worked on me, though I refused to believe it for awhile. But it only proves how great of an actor Joaquin Phoenix really is, because he really sold his performance as himself.
This plot by the two actors bottomed out into a documentary (a feaux documentary as of late) about Phoenix's "self-destruction" titled I'm Still Here. When I first saw promos for the film, I was even more confused about what Phoenix was doing. I mean sure the film would showcase his misery and deterioration, but then again he said he was done with movies. Either way, I didn't see it but I heard it was pretty good, especially at convincing folks that this thing going on with him was real.
Thankfully though, this whole thing was only a new acting method conceived by two actors/actor brothers who, for the most part, successfully executed a pledge, turn, and prestige. I was very glad to see him return to Letterman recently where he was thin, clean cut, and very presentable. Letterman's reaction was also good. Even though throughout this little project I was convinced that a man with so much talent, with incredible performances in movies such as Walk the Line, Gladiator, and We Own the Night, and whose own brother, River Phoenix, a young actor with much promise, had led a self destructive lifestyle (ending with River dead in a gutter) could transform like this. Not to mention, his rap was just embarrassing to watch; imagine his Johnny Cash singing voice juxtaposed with hip hop rhythm and posturing that makes 50 Cent look downplayed. But no, he wasn't totally insane, he just convinced us he was. Now that I think about it, Phoenix and Casey Affleck are really quite genius. I mean, how often does something truly surprising emerge from the Hollywood limelight these days? Joaquin Phoenix's breakdown was more fascinating than Paris Hilton getting a, like, week in lockup for carrying a bag of coke. Nearly all reality TV is fabricated and just bullshit, and very transparent when it is. Phoenix and Affleck were making doing the same thing, but it was not transparent in the slightest. In fact it did what most reality TV fails at: it convinced us it was reality.
Anywho, I look forward to whatever work Phoenix has planned now that his rap career clearly went nowhere. It's good to have him back. And for his performance, I must say: bravo, you sly dog.
This has been a new post from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Guess who's back
"You know, sometimes you just gotta say "what the fuck?" - Joel from Risky Business
No, Your Modest Guru did not suffer that nervous breakdown you expected to follow my last post. Actually I just needed time to recuperate, because, honestly, I was just being bombarded with news of just horrible events in the world. I didn't even talk about a lot of the bad stuff, just a few things. Even so, it made me miserable hearing about it all and even more miserable getting my thoughts out in the open. Anyone who reads my blog knows that I have good days where I'm an utterly cheery, clever, and charming bastard, and bad days where I am a depressed, downtrodden, and pessimistic sonofabitch. Also, I thought about taking a break from the blog anyway and it worked out for the better. I wrote a neat little short story and lifted my spirits. I will accept the fact that the really miserable subjects will not go away and I will have to make mention of them if I am to do this job. I will try to do it professionally and as an adult, and not let my personal feelings hamper my work. Emphasis on the word "try."
I held off coming back until my birthday, when I knew my outlook would be a little sunnier. So in celebration of seventeen years of life, I am back and ready for action. I have a whole bunch of little stories lined up to talk about and am staying away from the depressing shit...for now of course. So for those few people who actually know what this is, keep reading and thank you for sticking around.
This is the return of Your Modest Guru. Let's keep reading, shall we?
No, Your Modest Guru did not suffer that nervous breakdown you expected to follow my last post. Actually I just needed time to recuperate, because, honestly, I was just being bombarded with news of just horrible events in the world. I didn't even talk about a lot of the bad stuff, just a few things. Even so, it made me miserable hearing about it all and even more miserable getting my thoughts out in the open. Anyone who reads my blog knows that I have good days where I'm an utterly cheery, clever, and charming bastard, and bad days where I am a depressed, downtrodden, and pessimistic sonofabitch. Also, I thought about taking a break from the blog anyway and it worked out for the better. I wrote a neat little short story and lifted my spirits. I will accept the fact that the really miserable subjects will not go away and I will have to make mention of them if I am to do this job. I will try to do it professionally and as an adult, and not let my personal feelings hamper my work. Emphasis on the word "try."
I held off coming back until my birthday, when I knew my outlook would be a little sunnier. So in celebration of seventeen years of life, I am back and ready for action. I have a whole bunch of little stories lined up to talk about and am staying away from the depressing shit...for now of course. So for those few people who actually know what this is, keep reading and thank you for sticking around.
This is the return of Your Modest Guru. Let's keep reading, shall we?
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Post 9/11...post
"When it rains, it pours."
Don't think I didn't have plans to blog this week. I had a whole laundry list of shit that needed to be said. But it ultimately came to a point where I knew it was meaningless. I mean what was I going to say? Is there anything that I could have said that someone else hasn't already said; any new spin that I could put on this? No. Yesterday was 9/11 and like a holiday it comes and goes once a year and leaves us exhausted in some way.
Also, I don't think it's any surprise what I thought about the whole Koran book burning party down in Gainesville. Just another fucked up situation in a fucked up mess of them. I mean news isn't even news anymore. It's a circus. All it is is real facts glossed over to be juicy and entertaining. Yeah, I don't care what anyone says, the news is purely for entertainment. What do you think I'm doing? I'm mixing irony, sarcasm, and sometimes straight comedy with real news for your entertainment when really I should just be supplying facts. No actually a guy like me shouldn't be reporting the news, because I'm terrible at it. If you are on the news or supplying the news you are a celebrity. All of these people are just celebrities and are tools to get people talking. Terry Jones? Who the fuck is he? Nobody. Sarah Palin? Did you honestly even know who she was before 2008? Charles Manson? For some: a monster, for a freakishly large amount: a hero, because the bad guys are celebrities too. Logan Cox? Who? These people are not important at all! Celebrities who are not celebrities, people who have found fame, some just an inkling of fame, and revel in it. And now I'm ranting. What am I doing here?
I could go into the politics of Terry Jones' little limelight moment. How what was originally just a good ol' southern book burning turned into a threat from Jones so the New York mosque wouldn't be built. How there were numerous lies that the Imam conceded to Jones' will, how the book burning would be called off or the mosque would be called off. I honestly went from intrigued, to disgusted, to just completely uninterested in Jones, the mosque, and 9/11. I am actually going to try from now on to not make a big deal of 9/11 when it is brought up. I will do it out of respect for those who died. Those people who have been used, twisted, with families victimized and berated, and exist now as weapon for a Left Wing or a Right Wing. It's a tragedy these people, me included, drag into the circus far too often. They died, it happened. What more do I need to say?
I can remember, being home schooled at the time, my confusion at my mother's shock. I was six days away from being eight. I saw the smoking buildings, which honestly I'd never heard of, and thought it was a plane crash. I'd been even more against the news back then so I really didn't know what was going on. When the second plane hit, my mom was very scared and because of that I was very worried. That's what I know about that day. And ever since then, I've lived in this world of politics, of media mayhem, of the blurring line of good and evil, of growing cynicism and anger, and in this world I can't breathe. I know I live here with you. And I know I can never get away. This is life, laying bloody in the gutter alone, yet convinced that everything is going to be okay. And we all lay there with it, hoping that its not too late and never knowing if it is or isn't.
The only question is: did you really need me to tell you this?
This is Your Modest Guru, signing off for awhile now.
Don't think I didn't have plans to blog this week. I had a whole laundry list of shit that needed to be said. But it ultimately came to a point where I knew it was meaningless. I mean what was I going to say? Is there anything that I could have said that someone else hasn't already said; any new spin that I could put on this? No. Yesterday was 9/11 and like a holiday it comes and goes once a year and leaves us exhausted in some way.
Also, I don't think it's any surprise what I thought about the whole Koran book burning party down in Gainesville. Just another fucked up situation in a fucked up mess of them. I mean news isn't even news anymore. It's a circus. All it is is real facts glossed over to be juicy and entertaining. Yeah, I don't care what anyone says, the news is purely for entertainment. What do you think I'm doing? I'm mixing irony, sarcasm, and sometimes straight comedy with real news for your entertainment when really I should just be supplying facts. No actually a guy like me shouldn't be reporting the news, because I'm terrible at it. If you are on the news or supplying the news you are a celebrity. All of these people are just celebrities and are tools to get people talking. Terry Jones? Who the fuck is he? Nobody. Sarah Palin? Did you honestly even know who she was before 2008? Charles Manson? For some: a monster, for a freakishly large amount: a hero, because the bad guys are celebrities too. Logan Cox? Who? These people are not important at all! Celebrities who are not celebrities, people who have found fame, some just an inkling of fame, and revel in it. And now I'm ranting. What am I doing here?
I could go into the politics of Terry Jones' little limelight moment. How what was originally just a good ol' southern book burning turned into a threat from Jones so the New York mosque wouldn't be built. How there were numerous lies that the Imam conceded to Jones' will, how the book burning would be called off or the mosque would be called off. I honestly went from intrigued, to disgusted, to just completely uninterested in Jones, the mosque, and 9/11. I am actually going to try from now on to not make a big deal of 9/11 when it is brought up. I will do it out of respect for those who died. Those people who have been used, twisted, with families victimized and berated, and exist now as weapon for a Left Wing or a Right Wing. It's a tragedy these people, me included, drag into the circus far too often. They died, it happened. What more do I need to say?
I can remember, being home schooled at the time, my confusion at my mother's shock. I was six days away from being eight. I saw the smoking buildings, which honestly I'd never heard of, and thought it was a plane crash. I'd been even more against the news back then so I really didn't know what was going on. When the second plane hit, my mom was very scared and because of that I was very worried. That's what I know about that day. And ever since then, I've lived in this world of politics, of media mayhem, of the blurring line of good and evil, of growing cynicism and anger, and in this world I can't breathe. I know I live here with you. And I know I can never get away. This is life, laying bloody in the gutter alone, yet convinced that everything is going to be okay. And we all lay there with it, hoping that its not too late and never knowing if it is or isn't.
The only question is: did you really need me to tell you this?
This is Your Modest Guru, signing off for awhile now.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
The Underrated: Big Trouble
"Was that a goat?" - multiple characters
A very quotable, fun, and entertaining movie is Barry Sonnenfeld's Big Trouble. I consider it a sort of mini-Pulp Fiction. It features an ensemble cast of characters who are all funny, a multilayered story, and plenty of action and laughs. It isn't a great film, but it certainly deserves a little more credit in my opinion.
The plot contains several stories of different characters whose lives intersect at one point or another within a few days in Miami. These characters include divorced father Eliot (Tim Allen) and his rebellious son Matt (Ben Foster), superficial businessman Arthur Herk (Stanley Tucci), his sexy but miserable wife Anna (Rene Russo) and Anna's also rebellious daughter Jenny (Zooey Deschanel), a light hearted drifter Puggy (Jason Lee), and two dim witted thugs Snake (Tom Sizemore) and Eddie (Johnny Knoxville). A series of events puts Eliot and Anna in a romance, a price on Arthur's head, various people being attacked or robbed, and the entire city in danger of a briefcase stored weapon of mass destruction. The result is a pretty enjoyable movie.
Really there isn't any real deep analysis needed or a meaning to be provided, it is just a smart, funny movie that did not get as much recognition as it should have. But a movie smart enough and funny enough to have gained a little more recognition. A lot of movies have running jokes that go nowhere or are just unsatisfying, this movie has quite a few running jokes that are all pretty well enjoyable; I especially love the two northern hitman (played by Dennis Farina and Jack Kehler) being completely bewildered by all of the strange things they are coming across down south.
Maybe I am wrong and it is not as good as I say, but really everyone I know who has seen it has enjoyed it and I know some people who are pretty savvy when it comes to movies. If you wanna watch something good one night, Big Trouble is just as good a choice as any and you more than likely will not be disappointed.
This has been another segment of The Underrated from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
A very quotable, fun, and entertaining movie is Barry Sonnenfeld's Big Trouble. I consider it a sort of mini-Pulp Fiction. It features an ensemble cast of characters who are all funny, a multilayered story, and plenty of action and laughs. It isn't a great film, but it certainly deserves a little more credit in my opinion.
The plot contains several stories of different characters whose lives intersect at one point or another within a few days in Miami. These characters include divorced father Eliot (Tim Allen) and his rebellious son Matt (Ben Foster), superficial businessman Arthur Herk (Stanley Tucci), his sexy but miserable wife Anna (Rene Russo) and Anna's also rebellious daughter Jenny (Zooey Deschanel), a light hearted drifter Puggy (Jason Lee), and two dim witted thugs Snake (Tom Sizemore) and Eddie (Johnny Knoxville). A series of events puts Eliot and Anna in a romance, a price on Arthur's head, various people being attacked or robbed, and the entire city in danger of a briefcase stored weapon of mass destruction. The result is a pretty enjoyable movie.
Really there isn't any real deep analysis needed or a meaning to be provided, it is just a smart, funny movie that did not get as much recognition as it should have. But a movie smart enough and funny enough to have gained a little more recognition. A lot of movies have running jokes that go nowhere or are just unsatisfying, this movie has quite a few running jokes that are all pretty well enjoyable; I especially love the two northern hitman (played by Dennis Farina and Jack Kehler) being completely bewildered by all of the strange things they are coming across down south.
Maybe I am wrong and it is not as good as I say, but really everyone I know who has seen it has enjoyed it and I know some people who are pretty savvy when it comes to movies. If you wanna watch something good one night, Big Trouble is just as good a choice as any and you more than likely will not be disappointed.
This has been another segment of The Underrated from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Good is Bad says religious fanatics
"Up is down, black is white." - Eddie "The Dane" Dane
Okay very quickly, because I am sick and do not want to write in detail about more absurdities that piss me off.
Apparently a fanatical religious organization (I can't remember which one, too many to count) believes that the gay community's recent crusades against children bullying is some kind of sinful agenda that will make America's youth a flock of freakin' fairies. Yes, you know what this means readers. You know what this means America. Bullying is now the surest way to stay on the straight (as in sexuality) and narrow (as in genitalia) path to eternal paradise. Children! Children all across the world bully each other as much as possible, kindness and respect for one another will only make you as queer as a sold out Ricky Martin concert! Be angry, be violent, be bullies, and you will be SAVED!!! I can already feel the lord's everlasting bliss bestowed upon me as I dunk this 11 year old's head into a toilet and t-bag his brother. Praise the lord!
For those who weren't completely disgusted and were aware of my utter sarcasm, I must say that this whole notion is crazy. This religious group is not quite Westboro Baptist level, but crazy is still crazy. Seriously, are they that against people loving who they want to love that when the gays are doing something extremely positive it must be marked as something ungodly? Are they really that low? By saying this they are indeed saying that they would rather have bullies than gays trying to stop bullying. It just continues to show that too many of these groups use the name of a deity to commit their own selfish deeds. It's just...stupid! The only one doing anything wrong are these fanatics, because they are in fact doing nothing but bitching about people actaully doing something right. For those who believe in the actions of these fanatics, there really is nothing at all I can do to sway you from these delusions of holiness you seem to have haloing over your head so I will just say why don't you just pretend that whatever little man in the sky ruling your universe will hurt the ones you hate when their time comes and just mind your own damn business.
This has been more proof that this world won't get better delivered by Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading and to anyone with a cold, I'm right there with ya.
Okay very quickly, because I am sick and do not want to write in detail about more absurdities that piss me off.
Apparently a fanatical religious organization (I can't remember which one, too many to count) believes that the gay community's recent crusades against children bullying is some kind of sinful agenda that will make America's youth a flock of freakin' fairies. Yes, you know what this means readers. You know what this means America. Bullying is now the surest way to stay on the straight (as in sexuality) and narrow (as in genitalia) path to eternal paradise. Children! Children all across the world bully each other as much as possible, kindness and respect for one another will only make you as queer as a sold out Ricky Martin concert! Be angry, be violent, be bullies, and you will be SAVED!!! I can already feel the lord's everlasting bliss bestowed upon me as I dunk this 11 year old's head into a toilet and t-bag his brother. Praise the lord!
For those who weren't completely disgusted and were aware of my utter sarcasm, I must say that this whole notion is crazy. This religious group is not quite Westboro Baptist level, but crazy is still crazy. Seriously, are they that against people loving who they want to love that when the gays are doing something extremely positive it must be marked as something ungodly? Are they really that low? By saying this they are indeed saying that they would rather have bullies than gays trying to stop bullying. It just continues to show that too many of these groups use the name of a deity to commit their own selfish deeds. It's just...stupid! The only one doing anything wrong are these fanatics, because they are in fact doing nothing but bitching about people actaully doing something right. For those who believe in the actions of these fanatics, there really is nothing at all I can do to sway you from these delusions of holiness you seem to have haloing over your head so I will just say why don't you just pretend that whatever little man in the sky ruling your universe will hurt the ones you hate when their time comes and just mind your own damn business.
This has been more proof that this world won't get better delivered by Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading and to anyone with a cold, I'm right there with ya.
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