"The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary; men alone are quite capable of every wickedness."
- Joseph Conrad
In movies there are always those who stand in the way of what is good and just. They do it for profit, for power, out of spite, or just sometimes for fun. These men haunt our nightmares and make us fear humanity. They become monsters and do unspeakable things that make even the good guys shudder. But this is about who I find to be the baddest bad guys in movies.
13. Gaston from Beauty and the Beast
"It's not right for a woman to read. Soon she starts getting ideas and thinking."
Gaston is the main antagonist of my favorite Disney film, Beauty and the Beast. He is this movie's perfect bad guy because he is the exact opposite of the Beast: he is handsome and extremely macho while at the same time being a brooding sexist and bully. The strange thing about Gaston is he starts out as just being an obnoxious womanizer who annoys the main hero Belle, but at the end turns into a vicious killer when he finds out Belle is in the love with the Beast. Not only is he found to be a coward, but is a cheap shot artist to boot. But still his fury gets the best of him which leads to his very cliched death. Gaston gets number thirteen for being a surprisingly homicidal jerk.
12. Michael Myers from Halloween
"Just try and understand what we're dealing with here. Don't underestimate it."
Michael Myers is the first face of slasher movies, ironically the face is a recreated William Shatner. But never the less this killer of few words ranks as one of the scariest people to ever earn the title of boogieman. After killing his sister at age six, Michael is imprisoned and eventually categorized by his doctor as "Purely and simply evil". That's what is so scary, there is nothing at all wrong with him he is just evil. He soon escapes however and...Well watch Halloween. Michael has a creepy habit of walking slowly and stalking young girls. The only sound he makes is that of heavy breathing. Oh yeah and he tends to not die. You can stab him, shoot him, burn him, run him down, beat him to a pulp, electrocute him. The bastard doesn't go down. Halloween would've been better without sequels because Michael is scarier when you're left with the thought that he is still out there somewhere.
11. Lucifer from The Prophecy
"Your war is arrogance, that makes it evil...And that's mine."
Out of all of the insane actors to play the infamous role (Al Pacino, Peter Stormare, Elizabeth Hurley) I never would have thought Viggo Mortenson would be the one to play him just right. The Devil himself Lucifer does make an appearance late in the Prophecy to help the heroes defeat a renegade Angel played by Christopher Walken. Lucifer appears in a black suit of course, but also has the essence of a truly animalistic creature. He comes and goes, taunting the good guys while also giving them advice. He states plainly how different he is from his former partner by stating his lack of love or sympathy for humanity. He does what he does only to prevent the main villain from running him out of business. He even describes what hell is exactly. And you will know just how evil he is when he tears out a heart and eats it or when he vanishes into a horde of bats. This Lucifer will paint your world black.
10. Mr. Blonde from Reservoir Dogs
"If they hadn't a done what I told 'em not to do they'd still be alive."
Real name Vic Vega, Mr. Blonde is the cause of a heist gone wrong in Reservoir Dogs. We are told in the movie that Blonde had gone insane when a hostage tripped a silent alarm and began a killing spree that led to an intense shootout. But when we see Blonde he is calm, without remorse and almost passive about the entire thing. Despite the movie being a crime thriller, Blonde moves and acts very much like a slasher villain. For most of the time he is on screen he acts less violent than his comrades. That is until they are gone and he is left to look after a bound cop and does probably one of the most horrifying things ever in 90s cinema. Blonde leaves as abruptly as he enters and by the end of the movie we're still left to wonder just what exactly he did during the robbery.
9. Scar from The Lion King
"Long live the king!"
Disney movies show kids some courtesy and treat us like adults. They don't hesitate to show us a villain like Scar in a movie like The Lion King. Scar is an animal not only because he is a lion, but because he is a conniving, ruthless traitor who kills his own brother for the thrown. He is voiced by Jeremy Irons to boot. After exiling his nephew Simba, he runs his kingdom into the gutter but is in the end the subject of revenge not by the hero but by his own minions. Scar is a bastard of a villain and deserves to be on this list.
8. Early Grayce from Kalifornia
"Hey Bri, ask me some questions! "Do I feel powerful? Do I feel superior?" No I...I feel good."
Rednecks have always made for surreal or scary psychopaths. But at the beginning of his career, Brad Pitt took the cake as a greasy, paranoid serial killer Early Grayce. For a film where characters try to discover what makes a killer tick, Early was perfect because we are left to spectulate what motivates him. There are times when he kills for desperation and another for trivial reasons (A pair of flip flops for his girl). He breaks his parole with his simple minded girlfriend so he can move away from the sight of his murders. He tags along with a yuppie couple and buddies up with the boyfriend, a nonfiction writer, and repulses the girlfriend, a photographer. That is the sadness as Early grows on our hero, that is before he realizes what he is. Early is surprising, vicious and by the end you won't even recognize him as Brad Pitt.
7. John Doe from Se7en
"You're only alive today because I didn't kill you."
Evil at it's finest. The worst evil is the kind that considers itself to be good. John Doe, a mystery of a murderer, kills because he believes it is God's work and that he is shedding light on sin. His victims are chosen based off of the seven deadly sins. His agenda is unknown until the end and when it happens it is something truly ingenius and horrifying. Doe believes strongly that the people he kills are guilty and evil and that he is a necessary evil. He goes to extreme measures to prevent an error in his plans and to make his victims die "right". The film does the write thing by not showing him until the end. We may never know who he was exactly but we will never forget what he did.
6. The Joker from The Dark Knight
"This city deserves a better class of criminal. And I'm gonna give it to them."
Oh yes, Heath Ledger outdoes even Jack Nicholson when playing Batman's arch enemy. Here The Joker is shown to be a raving terrorist and mass murderer who is obsessed with showing the world to be as insane as himself. His mouth was cut ear to ear in the past under mysterious circumstances, making a permanant grin. Now he exists only to be a duality to Batman, or more so the perfect duality to good. He kills brutally and without pause and is above nothing. No one knows when his plans will end. One thing is known however he will only stop when he dies, and he isn't the least bit scared of death. In fact he encourages it. The Joker ranks as one of the most menacing villains in recent years.
5. Lestat from Interview With The Vampire
"Don't be afraid. I'm going to give you the choice I never had."
Yeah forget Dracula, this is the charming vampire I fear the most. Lestat, played by Tom Cruise, is a manipulator and a self made creature of the night who at times seeks companionship for his dark path. He gleefully kills rich women for sport but is annoyed with concepts such as kindness and spirituality. His motivations are blood and luxury. He is an interesting vampire as nothing seems to kill him, even drinking dead blood which he claims usually does the trick. Lestat goes through a lot and over the centuries he experiences as much misery as he has joy. If one is unfortunate enough to meet him he may give you an opportunity to be like him which is a win or lose situation.
4. Noah Cross from Chinatown
"Most people never have to face the fact that at the right time and the right place they're capable of...Anything!"
Noah Cross, here is a villain who I knew was sinister but never could have imagined he'd turn out the way he did. Cross is a shady millionaire industrialist who runs his operations in 1930s Los Angeles. He however becomes involved in his son in law and business partner's murder and it is soon revealed what kind of a man he truly is. Cross is an unspeakable monster who has one thing more than any of these villains. Absolute power. The police can't touch him, therefore the hero can't either. That is the sadness of Chinatown: Noah Cross can't be stopped.
3. Darth Vader from Star Wars
"I find your lack of faith disturbing."
The hand behind the galactic Empire. Vader is a former hero who crossed over to the Dark side and now reigns supreme. He is known for wearing a black metallic suit that keeps him alive and his mask causes him to breathe heavily. He has the upper hand often by using his mastery of the force and lightsaber to destroy his enemies. Vader is a force to be reckoned with but also has a deep connection with his primary enemies. This is one everyone remembers and always will rememer because of his epic evil he represents.
2. Anton Chigurh from No Country for Old Men
"You stand to win everything. Call it."
This in my opinion is evil personified. Unflinching, uncaring, relentless evil. Anton Chigurh is a hitman who is assigned to what others can't. He has an extreme sense of honor, if he is dishonored you will die. That means fighting him, annoying him, wasting his time, or sometimes being near him. No one sees his face and lives and if they do they become "accountable". There isn't much he won't do to get the job done. There are times when he is confused when his code is questioned. This is his way and he knows no other way to live. There is some zen mystery to him as we don't know where a man like this comes from. What could make a man like this. So evil.
1. Hannibal Lecter from The Silence of the Lambs
"Oh Clarice, you're problem is you need to get more fun out of life."
Hannibal "The Cannibal" Lecter is all that is insane. He is at first a manipulator and the source of fear is within his disturbing behavior and his reputation. Until he is biting into a police officer's face, you won't know how monstrous he is. What makes Hannibal so infamous, is how charming and intelligent he is. There are points when you want him to win. He has been known to help the authorities catch similar killers, while at the same time playing with their minds. He is also a master escape artist. One may be lucky enough not to be a victim of his as he tends to eat the rude whenever he can. So smart is he that if you had him at gunpoint he could convince you to shoot yourself in the head. A killer that can get inside your mind as well as your flesh. People who go head to head with Hannibal Lecter are immediately on his menu, save for pretty young FBI agents.
This has been a recollection of badness from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Celebrity Deaths...WTF
"Verse, fame, and beauty are intense indeed, but Death intenser - Death is life's high mead."
- John Keats
I have to get this off my chest now before it happens to someone else. The past few years have been very bad for celebrities. Mainly because they all seem to be dying sporadically. I will give you examples of this.
A few years ago I was reading Slaughterhouse Five, it was morning and, holding the book in my hand, I saw on the news that Kurt Vonnegut had died. I was shocked and had for long felt that I was somehow responsible. Awhile after that another famous author kicked the bucket, Michael Crichton who wrote my beloved Jurassic Park. I think Death realized not many people knew these names so he decided to start hitting people in Hollywood's limelight. Owen Wilson almost killed himself, thank god it was only almost. Young actor Brad Renfro died of an OD. Probably one of the most memorable was the passing of Heath Ledger after he had just had a career defining role in the Dark Knight. Later after that two actors I adored died, Bernie Mac and Paul Newman died, Mac from illness and Newman from cancer. Actress Natascha Richadrson also died of injuries from a skiing accident. Several weeks ago David Carridine, known for Kill Bill, Kung Fu, and Death Race 3000, was found dead under rather embarrassing circumstances. But lately what's been the subject of all news covering four celebrity deaths: This started with TV personality Ed McMahon, than Farrah Fawcett after a long battle of cancer, than cherished musician Michael Jackson, and now TV salesman Billy Mays.
I feel ashamed that I only really Ed McMahon by name, but I'm sure I will familiarize myself with him soon so that I may respect him a bit more. Farrah Fawcett was well known to me for her sparkly personality and beauty and the news of her passing made me feel bad, especially for her Husband Ryan O'Neal. To be honest I found Billy Mays to be charming but annoying as I've never liked infomericals. But now that he's gone I find he will be one of the annoying things that you can't really imagine living without. Worst of all was the passing of beloved pop sensation Michael Jackson, a man whose life has been music since he was in elementary school. From the time I knew what music was Michael Jackson has been a symbol for it that I knew. There was always something about him you could like: His freakishly awesome dance moves, his songs, his charitable work, his upbeat personality. He was not without controversy of course as he had gone through various degrees of plastic surgery, balcony dangled one baby, and was forever slandered by child molestation allegations of which I do not believe.
These were all great people, but the question stands. Why the fuck are they dying like this? I mean it seems just a tad weird that so many of them would die in such a small span of time. Is it some sort of sign. I don't know maybe it all is just random and coincidental. That still doesn't change the fact that it is overly depressing. I'm just afraid for who bites the dust next.
This has been a suspicious celebrity salute from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- John Keats
I have to get this off my chest now before it happens to someone else. The past few years have been very bad for celebrities. Mainly because they all seem to be dying sporadically. I will give you examples of this.
A few years ago I was reading Slaughterhouse Five, it was morning and, holding the book in my hand, I saw on the news that Kurt Vonnegut had died. I was shocked and had for long felt that I was somehow responsible. Awhile after that another famous author kicked the bucket, Michael Crichton who wrote my beloved Jurassic Park. I think Death realized not many people knew these names so he decided to start hitting people in Hollywood's limelight. Owen Wilson almost killed himself, thank god it was only almost. Young actor Brad Renfro died of an OD. Probably one of the most memorable was the passing of Heath Ledger after he had just had a career defining role in the Dark Knight. Later after that two actors I adored died, Bernie Mac and Paul Newman died, Mac from illness and Newman from cancer. Actress Natascha Richadrson also died of injuries from a skiing accident. Several weeks ago David Carridine, known for Kill Bill, Kung Fu, and Death Race 3000, was found dead under rather embarrassing circumstances. But lately what's been the subject of all news covering four celebrity deaths: This started with TV personality Ed McMahon, than Farrah Fawcett after a long battle of cancer, than cherished musician Michael Jackson, and now TV salesman Billy Mays.
I feel ashamed that I only really Ed McMahon by name, but I'm sure I will familiarize myself with him soon so that I may respect him a bit more. Farrah Fawcett was well known to me for her sparkly personality and beauty and the news of her passing made me feel bad, especially for her Husband Ryan O'Neal. To be honest I found Billy Mays to be charming but annoying as I've never liked infomericals. But now that he's gone I find he will be one of the annoying things that you can't really imagine living without. Worst of all was the passing of beloved pop sensation Michael Jackson, a man whose life has been music since he was in elementary school. From the time I knew what music was Michael Jackson has been a symbol for it that I knew. There was always something about him you could like: His freakishly awesome dance moves, his songs, his charitable work, his upbeat personality. He was not without controversy of course as he had gone through various degrees of plastic surgery, balcony dangled one baby, and was forever slandered by child molestation allegations of which I do not believe.
These were all great people, but the question stands. Why the fuck are they dying like this? I mean it seems just a tad weird that so many of them would die in such a small span of time. Is it some sort of sign. I don't know maybe it all is just random and coincidental. That still doesn't change the fact that it is overly depressing. I'm just afraid for who bites the dust next.
This has been a suspicious celebrity salute from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Monday, June 22, 2009
The Importance of Being Video
"A good film is when the price of dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it."
- Alfred Hitchcock
People love movies. It's a fact. But when there is not a Blockbuster in sight people have for a long time looked to rent videos. This has gone on for years. I had to do it, I was born in the '90s. My main source of video or DVD rental was from a local hardware store that made it's income more from movies than tools. It was a routine thing for years, until it was said "LET THERE BE NETFLIX" and there was.
Netflix, the movie rental service, sprung up over night and pretty soon everyone was into it. I'm a four year customer. This whole post was originally going to be about Netflix and how the video stores are become obsolete, but now I've decided to pick on DVD's which is the only thing Netflix produces to the public.
Now there are a lot of good things to say about DVD's and many people like them. It is a lot better to hit menu than go to your favorite scene or go to the special features and see how everything was done for your movie. But still I was born with VHS and will probably always love VHS. VHS primarily is more durable, you leave it out, dust won't really matter. If you drop nothing really happens unless your dropping it over and over on hard cement. And if by accident you do break more than likely you can just roll the film back in and it should work. A DVD on the other hand leave it out and dust will reduce it to shit. You drop it and it will crack and it skips more than rocks. After that you can't roll anything in, it's done for and you have to buy a new one. A lot of my DVD's don't last five years without turning into a tiltaworld, my videos on the otherhand have lasted for almost twenty years and still work great.
Sadly VHS won't be around for much longer as they are already beginning to stop making them. You'll notice now that they aren't saying "Coming soon to video and DVD" but "Coming soon to DVD and blue ray". Quality is good, but not if it's fragile as a goddamn piece of crystal glass. I'm gonna have to learn to deal, but as I've said before: just because that's the way it is doesn't mean I have to like it.
This has been a true statement from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- Alfred Hitchcock
People love movies. It's a fact. But when there is not a Blockbuster in sight people have for a long time looked to rent videos. This has gone on for years. I had to do it, I was born in the '90s. My main source of video or DVD rental was from a local hardware store that made it's income more from movies than tools. It was a routine thing for years, until it was said "LET THERE BE NETFLIX" and there was.
Netflix, the movie rental service, sprung up over night and pretty soon everyone was into it. I'm a four year customer. This whole post was originally going to be about Netflix and how the video stores are become obsolete, but now I've decided to pick on DVD's which is the only thing Netflix produces to the public.
Now there are a lot of good things to say about DVD's and many people like them. It is a lot better to hit menu than go to your favorite scene or go to the special features and see how everything was done for your movie. But still I was born with VHS and will probably always love VHS. VHS primarily is more durable, you leave it out, dust won't really matter. If you drop nothing really happens unless your dropping it over and over on hard cement. And if by accident you do break more than likely you can just roll the film back in and it should work. A DVD on the other hand leave it out and dust will reduce it to shit. You drop it and it will crack and it skips more than rocks. After that you can't roll anything in, it's done for and you have to buy a new one. A lot of my DVD's don't last five years without turning into a tiltaworld, my videos on the otherhand have lasted for almost twenty years and still work great.
Sadly VHS won't be around for much longer as they are already beginning to stop making them. You'll notice now that they aren't saying "Coming soon to video and DVD" but "Coming soon to DVD and blue ray". Quality is good, but not if it's fragile as a goddamn piece of crystal glass. I'm gonna have to learn to deal, but as I've said before: just because that's the way it is doesn't mean I have to like it.
This has been a true statement from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Fox/Jolie
"Beauty is merciless. You do not look at it, it looks at you and does not forgive."
- Nikos Kazantzakis
You've seen the magazine covers and E news reports, there is apparently some kind of Hollywood duel between acclaimed acting beauty Angelina Jolie and new eye candy Megan Fox. None of us really give a shit but still it's the little things that make up life so here we go. Now from what I've read Jolie was snuffed for the role of Lara Croft in the Tomb Raider series over Fox. Happens all the time, I know, but I think the main criticism is that everyone believes Fox was chosen over Jolie because they look very much alike and she is younger. I don't know where peoples' heads are at when they think thirty four is old as hell.
Fox has reportedly turned down the roll due to the fact that she is being compared to Jolie, something she claims to have had to do many times. Fox has also been quoted as being "terrified" of Jolie claiming she is a powerful, god like figure that would "eat her alive". If that isn't melodramatic exaggeration I don't know what is.
Now comes the personal bashing which I will begin starting with a Ralph Waldo Emerson quote "Beauty without expression tires." Angelina Jolie expresses power, range, compassion, classical beauty and a powerhouse better half. The only thing Megan Fox expresses is her luscious young jailbait body. Seriously, you look at photos of her, which I'm sure you often do, even the people who like her will be able to see she is the prime example of a Hollywood manufactured celebrity. Even Fox herself has said that the only similarity is their looks and the action roles they've been involved with. Fine ass goes a long way but talent and fine ass goes even farther. Apologies Megan, but you are the former. It's not that I hate her, it's that I certainly don't hate looking at her and that's all she has to offer. Still no matter how hot that body is, Angelina is always gonna be the more attractive in my book.
This has been some biased gossip from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- Nikos Kazantzakis
You've seen the magazine covers and E news reports, there is apparently some kind of Hollywood duel between acclaimed acting beauty Angelina Jolie and new eye candy Megan Fox. None of us really give a shit but still it's the little things that make up life so here we go. Now from what I've read Jolie was snuffed for the role of Lara Croft in the Tomb Raider series over Fox. Happens all the time, I know, but I think the main criticism is that everyone believes Fox was chosen over Jolie because they look very much alike and she is younger. I don't know where peoples' heads are at when they think thirty four is old as hell.
Fox has reportedly turned down the roll due to the fact that she is being compared to Jolie, something she claims to have had to do many times. Fox has also been quoted as being "terrified" of Jolie claiming she is a powerful, god like figure that would "eat her alive". If that isn't melodramatic exaggeration I don't know what is.
Now comes the personal bashing which I will begin starting with a Ralph Waldo Emerson quote "Beauty without expression tires." Angelina Jolie expresses power, range, compassion, classical beauty and a powerhouse better half. The only thing Megan Fox expresses is her luscious young jailbait body. Seriously, you look at photos of her, which I'm sure you often do, even the people who like her will be able to see she is the prime example of a Hollywood manufactured celebrity. Even Fox herself has said that the only similarity is their looks and the action roles they've been involved with. Fine ass goes a long way but talent and fine ass goes even farther. Apologies Megan, but you are the former. It's not that I hate her, it's that I certainly don't hate looking at her and that's all she has to offer. Still no matter how hot that body is, Angelina is always gonna be the more attractive in my book.
This has been some biased gossip from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Bros Before Hoes
"Think where man's glory most begins and ends, And say my glory was I had such friends."
- William Butler Yeats
The bros before hoes policy is one I myself find very difficult to abide by. You know, friends before girlfriends or the men before the women. For me it would have to be either pretty shitty friends or a really terrible girl. If it's a matter where you are sure this girl is a sure thing and you're sure that your friends will still be there, than why not go for the girl. This policy is said to run on loyalty. Loyalty to the ones you hang out with. But I would think that a social life can go beyond a circle of friends.
Maybe the point of this rant is that I find the bros before hoes policy to be selfish. There is a difference between being loyal and being whipped. Unless the girl your with is the one whose got you whipped. That may be when the policy should be used. Otherwise, we love our buddies, dearly but not queerly, but we all need some feminine wiles in our lives.
This has been an incoherent arguement from your modest guru. Thanks for reading.
- William Butler Yeats
The bros before hoes policy is one I myself find very difficult to abide by. You know, friends before girlfriends or the men before the women. For me it would have to be either pretty shitty friends or a really terrible girl. If it's a matter where you are sure this girl is a sure thing and you're sure that your friends will still be there, than why not go for the girl. This policy is said to run on loyalty. Loyalty to the ones you hang out with. But I would think that a social life can go beyond a circle of friends.
Maybe the point of this rant is that I find the bros before hoes policy to be selfish. There is a difference between being loyal and being whipped. Unless the girl your with is the one whose got you whipped. That may be when the policy should be used. Otherwise, we love our buddies, dearly but not queerly, but we all need some feminine wiles in our lives.
This has been an incoherent arguement from your modest guru. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
The King's Tales
"...The great appeal of horror ficition through the ages is that it serves as a rehearsal for our own deaths."
- Stephen King
Probably everyone's favorite lord of thrills and chills is Stephen King, an author who cranks out book after book in the amount of time most people take lunch breaks. King is known for being able to summon horrific tales, emotional epics and optimistic ballads within his work all of which is highly effective.
Shameful to say, I have not actually read a Stephen King book...Yet. But by God I've read his short fiction, which in my opinion kicks ass. Your Modest Guru is mixing it up a bit this time and doing a review on some short stories of his I've read, mainly ones within the Night Shift anthology.
Being a critic and reviewer is not something unfamiliar to me, seeing as how I've stacked a considerable amount on Netflix. However this is my first literary review so I am kind of new at this. If this is hard to follow, you can't say I didn't warn you, jackass.
Though Night Shift contains a long list of deep and dark stories, most of which were published in 70s magazines, I will talk about the ones I most enjoyed aka the only ones I read:
1. To start off I'm talking about The Ledge. Here King incorporates a very Hitchcockian feel to this thriller about a tennis instructor who is given a dangerous offer by his lover's gangster husband. He gets the money and the wife but only if he circumnavigates his way around the ledge of his highrise penthouse. Holy shit, that is scary. Throw in a jerk pigion and a gun and you have yourself one solid nail biting story.
2. You know that movie about the retarded guy who mows lawns but gains psycic powers and intelligence? Yeah that has nothing to do with the original Lawnmower Man short story, which basically involves a man being harrassed by a strange lawnmower man and, even more strange, his lawnmower which seems to have a mind of its own. Nothing like fresh cut grass fertilized with blood I suppose. Listen closely to the dialogue and you'll find something even more insidious is going on with the lawnmower.
3. King develops a cool action story by placing a professional hitman against an army!...Just not quite the army you would expect. This story is correctly titled Battleground. Yes in revenge for killing a toy maker, an assassin finds himself defenseless against a boxful of toy soldiers that attack with every means of miniature warfare. The tension is great and the end is brilliant.
4. Quitters Inc. is probably the most implausible of the horror stories previously presented but is the scariest nonetheless. I mean every smoker probably does wanna quit smoking but finds it difficult. Well apparently Quitters Inc. is the best strategy. It's easy, just imagine if Joe Pesci from Goodfellas was the guy helping you out. Oh yes, you will quit or else. This was especially scary for me because my mom is a smoker.
5. Time to lighten the mood with the story more suited for the drama category. The Last Rung on the Ladder is about a man receives a letter from the sister he never sees which brings back a meaningful memory from their childhood when her life was in danger and she depended on him. This is one that evoked a Stand by Me feeling in me. It shows an adolescent situation we can relate to and than surprises us with the unflinching pain of adulthood. This was sweet and honest and tragic.
6. Finally we have The Man Who Loved Flowers, this started out cute but nothing is at seems when King is behind it. You don't hear about violence in these stories and not get any later. It's all about a sharp dressed man strolling through the city, everybody can tell he's got a case of puppy love and envy it. He buys some flowers for a special girl and then goes off to find her. It sounds charming right? Right? Fucking wrong, we get the rug pulled out from under us and find out what really happens under the layers of what we percieved to be normal and pure. The last dialogue exchange in this is priceless and realistic. It might also be the most well written of these few stories.
That's it, so if you wanna cry, laugh awkwardly, or just shit your pants read these tales and more in Night Shift. And why the hell does this sound like a commerical.
Hope to read a King novel soon.
This has been a semi-tasteful book review by Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- Stephen King
Probably everyone's favorite lord of thrills and chills is Stephen King, an author who cranks out book after book in the amount of time most people take lunch breaks. King is known for being able to summon horrific tales, emotional epics and optimistic ballads within his work all of which is highly effective.
Shameful to say, I have not actually read a Stephen King book...Yet. But by God I've read his short fiction, which in my opinion kicks ass. Your Modest Guru is mixing it up a bit this time and doing a review on some short stories of his I've read, mainly ones within the Night Shift anthology.
Being a critic and reviewer is not something unfamiliar to me, seeing as how I've stacked a considerable amount on Netflix. However this is my first literary review so I am kind of new at this. If this is hard to follow, you can't say I didn't warn you, jackass.
Though Night Shift contains a long list of deep and dark stories, most of which were published in 70s magazines, I will talk about the ones I most enjoyed aka the only ones I read:
1. To start off I'm talking about The Ledge. Here King incorporates a very Hitchcockian feel to this thriller about a tennis instructor who is given a dangerous offer by his lover's gangster husband. He gets the money and the wife but only if he circumnavigates his way around the ledge of his highrise penthouse. Holy shit, that is scary. Throw in a jerk pigion and a gun and you have yourself one solid nail biting story.
2. You know that movie about the retarded guy who mows lawns but gains psycic powers and intelligence? Yeah that has nothing to do with the original Lawnmower Man short story, which basically involves a man being harrassed by a strange lawnmower man and, even more strange, his lawnmower which seems to have a mind of its own. Nothing like fresh cut grass fertilized with blood I suppose. Listen closely to the dialogue and you'll find something even more insidious is going on with the lawnmower.
3. King develops a cool action story by placing a professional hitman against an army!...Just not quite the army you would expect. This story is correctly titled Battleground. Yes in revenge for killing a toy maker, an assassin finds himself defenseless against a boxful of toy soldiers that attack with every means of miniature warfare. The tension is great and the end is brilliant.
4. Quitters Inc. is probably the most implausible of the horror stories previously presented but is the scariest nonetheless. I mean every smoker probably does wanna quit smoking but finds it difficult. Well apparently Quitters Inc. is the best strategy. It's easy, just imagine if Joe Pesci from Goodfellas was the guy helping you out. Oh yes, you will quit or else. This was especially scary for me because my mom is a smoker.
5. Time to lighten the mood with the story more suited for the drama category. The Last Rung on the Ladder is about a man receives a letter from the sister he never sees which brings back a meaningful memory from their childhood when her life was in danger and she depended on him. This is one that evoked a Stand by Me feeling in me. It shows an adolescent situation we can relate to and than surprises us with the unflinching pain of adulthood. This was sweet and honest and tragic.
6. Finally we have The Man Who Loved Flowers, this started out cute but nothing is at seems when King is behind it. You don't hear about violence in these stories and not get any later. It's all about a sharp dressed man strolling through the city, everybody can tell he's got a case of puppy love and envy it. He buys some flowers for a special girl and then goes off to find her. It sounds charming right? Right? Fucking wrong, we get the rug pulled out from under us and find out what really happens under the layers of what we percieved to be normal and pure. The last dialogue exchange in this is priceless and realistic. It might also be the most well written of these few stories.
That's it, so if you wanna cry, laugh awkwardly, or just shit your pants read these tales and more in Night Shift. And why the hell does this sound like a commerical.
Hope to read a King novel soon.
This has been a semi-tasteful book review by Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Apocalypse, Now or Never
"I don't think about technique. The ideas dictate everything. You have to be true to that or you're dead."
- David Lynch
We all know it's going to happen. I mean according to the Christians the end of days could come tomorrow or the next or the next day. Armageddon's schedule is pretty much open around the clock. But like all things, I don't think it will turn out the way we all think. Still everyone else seems to have their own idea of what's going to happen, so I might as well throw my theory in too. As George A. Romero has prophesized, when the end comes the dead will rise from their graves or morgues and feast on the living until humanity has been consumed or converted into these zombies.
I mean come on people there hasn't ever been as much evidence as there is today: Christianists, The Democratic Party, Keanu Reeves. Plus it's the perfect timing seeing as how the number of dead could overtake the living quickly. How very ironic, the ones we put in the ground have shot up to pull us down with us. There's nothing the government can do about it seeing as how the only the way to destroy the undead legions before infecting the human population would be to wage nuclear war (surprise, surprise). But that won't do any good because there are so many dead people everywhere in the world that we couldn't kill them without killing everyone else (double surprise, surprise).
Finally the point of this insufferable post, what does the little guy do? Everyone has gotta have a zombie plan. A plan detailing an intense and dangerous journey of survival and preservation of mankind. That's the question comment if you like with your ideas. The zombies are taking over quickly, you're alone and with little time to think what would you do. Where to run, where to hide, who to save, what to bring?
My plan: Seeing as how it's very unlikely I will be lifted up to heaven, I've devised a plan.
1. First thing's first, find people. More people means a better fighting chance, moral support, possible reproduction, and something else to get chased down before me. If I can I will save as many as possible.
2. Break into the local shopping center. Steal a lot of food, clothing and other necessary materials. Stock up on as much as I can carry, I'll need to last out the man eating bastards.
3. Weapons most of all. Typically a shot to the head will kill a zombie, but you never know. Guns and ammunition are essential and are the most important as I can keep my distance and kill. Knives, axe, propane tanks (for explosives), flammeable substances, chainsaws. If it kills them clean and fast I'll use it.
4. Hole up inside of a bank. Banks have security systems, it's made to protect. Lock up and keep locked. Find a route to the roof to check up on the zombies. Will move if necessary.
5. Can't just sit around. Will set up guerilla strikes against the zombies, this includes bombings and ambushes and traps. The fewer dead the better. I just have to watch my back.
6. If I can't outlast the dead until rescue comes or if rescue won't come at all I will massacre the damn dirty zombies. Using every weapon I've got until they've surrounded me in which case it's suicide, hopefully by a large explosion that takes a decent number of them with me.
That's my plan, what's yours?
This has been a detailed battle plan from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- David Lynch
We all know it's going to happen. I mean according to the Christians the end of days could come tomorrow or the next or the next day. Armageddon's schedule is pretty much open around the clock. But like all things, I don't think it will turn out the way we all think. Still everyone else seems to have their own idea of what's going to happen, so I might as well throw my theory in too. As George A. Romero has prophesized, when the end comes the dead will rise from their graves or morgues and feast on the living until humanity has been consumed or converted into these zombies.
I mean come on people there hasn't ever been as much evidence as there is today: Christianists, The Democratic Party, Keanu Reeves. Plus it's the perfect timing seeing as how the number of dead could overtake the living quickly. How very ironic, the ones we put in the ground have shot up to pull us down with us. There's nothing the government can do about it seeing as how the only the way to destroy the undead legions before infecting the human population would be to wage nuclear war (surprise, surprise). But that won't do any good because there are so many dead people everywhere in the world that we couldn't kill them without killing everyone else (double surprise, surprise).
Finally the point of this insufferable post, what does the little guy do? Everyone has gotta have a zombie plan. A plan detailing an intense and dangerous journey of survival and preservation of mankind. That's the question comment if you like with your ideas. The zombies are taking over quickly, you're alone and with little time to think what would you do. Where to run, where to hide, who to save, what to bring?
My plan: Seeing as how it's very unlikely I will be lifted up to heaven, I've devised a plan.
1. First thing's first, find people. More people means a better fighting chance, moral support, possible reproduction, and something else to get chased down before me. If I can I will save as many as possible.
2. Break into the local shopping center. Steal a lot of food, clothing and other necessary materials. Stock up on as much as I can carry, I'll need to last out the man eating bastards.
3. Weapons most of all. Typically a shot to the head will kill a zombie, but you never know. Guns and ammunition are essential and are the most important as I can keep my distance and kill. Knives, axe, propane tanks (for explosives), flammeable substances, chainsaws. If it kills them clean and fast I'll use it.
4. Hole up inside of a bank. Banks have security systems, it's made to protect. Lock up and keep locked. Find a route to the roof to check up on the zombies. Will move if necessary.
5. Can't just sit around. Will set up guerilla strikes against the zombies, this includes bombings and ambushes and traps. The fewer dead the better. I just have to watch my back.
6. If I can't outlast the dead until rescue comes or if rescue won't come at all I will massacre the damn dirty zombies. Using every weapon I've got until they've surrounded me in which case it's suicide, hopefully by a large explosion that takes a decent number of them with me.
That's my plan, what's yours?
This has been a detailed battle plan from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
A Douche Called Life
Bad things happen to good people, that's a universal trend. Why I ask. You'd think if there were a God he wouldn't reward sweet and kind people with misery and despair. What's so fuckin righteous about that. Lives are ruined on a whim in this world. Maybe it's all random, maybe it's some destiny. If that is the case, than destiny is a cold hearted whore of a thing. If you think that's funny, you're wrong it's not funny. It's true. I don't care if life isn't fair, when something bad shatters something good it pisses me off. It pisses me off especially when it falls on others. People don't deserve the shit they get sometimes. If it's all meant to be than there's nothing I can do but I will never be okay with it.
Show some love to the people you know who've lost. I'm not saying give them some kind of charity. Let them know you care. Remind them how great the world can be.
This has been a down note from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Show some love to the people you know who've lost. I'm not saying give them some kind of charity. Let them know you care. Remind them how great the world can be.
This has been a down note from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
When Fun Died
"Get busy livin, or get busy dyin."
- Andy Dufresne
It's kinda sad when you go to school, you've accepted the fact that it's more than likely going to be a very boring and terrible day and you know what to expect only to have the bastards blind side you with some kind of activity. An activity the brass thinks will be fun and informative all in one package.
It doesn't matter what it is. One way or another this is going to make your day even worse. The days when you are begging to be constricted to a class room are the ones I hate the most. The teachers like to lie to the parents, the kids and, sometimes, themselves when they claim that school is fun. You'll never find an adult more divorced from his youth than in an educator. How do I know this? Because an educator doesn't know what fun is. A day they claim is dedicated to fun really shouldn't be regulated to being confined to a dark gym, sitting on metal bleachers that leave a sting on your ass for the rest of the day, all to watch a "conform and do right" video that features cliched or bad acting. I esspecially love the "really fun days" when we get the gym and the ass stinging bleachers but with a motivational speaker who tries to make an impression on us by telling the tale of how he/she rose up from a disturbing and impoverished life to be a motivational speaker. According to the school higher ups, nothing says fun like the horrifying life stories of former druggies and slum dwellers. It's not that I don't sympathize with them or see where they are coming from but what is the message: if you clean up after spending your teenage years dropping acid, getting shot by hooker mom, and escaping the clutches of sexual predator relatives you will become successful? Here's a new subject for school: common sense and logic 101.
I know they mean well, but the fact is that they should make an effort. If the school corporation is to do something such as this they should not label it under the category of fun. I didn't have fun I was depressed. It's like Pennywise from "It", the clown that lured kids in with fun balloons and clown gimmicks and everything only to scare the shit out of them and take their souls. My advice to the schools would be to just stick to letting us free to roam around the outside or the gym and giving us some sports balls to play with. There's a dozen ways to have fun with just that. More than The Dark Gym of Broken Dreams. I don't think I've ever felt it was a teacher's place to make school fun, I leave that to the kids. The prisoners like me.
This has been an educational moment from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- Andy Dufresne
It's kinda sad when you go to school, you've accepted the fact that it's more than likely going to be a very boring and terrible day and you know what to expect only to have the bastards blind side you with some kind of activity. An activity the brass thinks will be fun and informative all in one package.
It doesn't matter what it is. One way or another this is going to make your day even worse. The days when you are begging to be constricted to a class room are the ones I hate the most. The teachers like to lie to the parents, the kids and, sometimes, themselves when they claim that school is fun. You'll never find an adult more divorced from his youth than in an educator. How do I know this? Because an educator doesn't know what fun is. A day they claim is dedicated to fun really shouldn't be regulated to being confined to a dark gym, sitting on metal bleachers that leave a sting on your ass for the rest of the day, all to watch a "conform and do right" video that features cliched or bad acting. I esspecially love the "really fun days" when we get the gym and the ass stinging bleachers but with a motivational speaker who tries to make an impression on us by telling the tale of how he/she rose up from a disturbing and impoverished life to be a motivational speaker. According to the school higher ups, nothing says fun like the horrifying life stories of former druggies and slum dwellers. It's not that I don't sympathize with them or see where they are coming from but what is the message: if you clean up after spending your teenage years dropping acid, getting shot by hooker mom, and escaping the clutches of sexual predator relatives you will become successful? Here's a new subject for school: common sense and logic 101.
I know they mean well, but the fact is that they should make an effort. If the school corporation is to do something such as this they should not label it under the category of fun. I didn't have fun I was depressed. It's like Pennywise from "It", the clown that lured kids in with fun balloons and clown gimmicks and everything only to scare the shit out of them and take their souls. My advice to the schools would be to just stick to letting us free to roam around the outside or the gym and giving us some sports balls to play with. There's a dozen ways to have fun with just that. More than The Dark Gym of Broken Dreams. I don't think I've ever felt it was a teacher's place to make school fun, I leave that to the kids. The prisoners like me.
This has been an educational moment from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Monday, June 8, 2009
A Spike In My Side
"Yo, what do you wanna live in a black neighborhood for anyway, man? Motherfuck gentrification!
- Buggin Out
Yes that quote is from Do The Right Thing. Why you ask? I love movies because I love to be entertained and invested into a story. I admire everyone who brings talant and craft to good movies. Most of all the directors. I often read up on these directors and learn how they mastered their work.
One such example, and incidentally the subject of this blog, is controversial and revered director Spike Lee. Here is a man who took to heart the sufferings of the African American culture. A man who saw racism being ignored and showed it to the ignorant. A man who has created intelligent, funny, dramatic and cheerfully vulgur films that more often than not stare social issues in the face. This all sounds great. I thought so. Thing about Spike Lee is he is very touchy.
Maybe having such a well placed knowledge of racism has driven him paranoid and now he believes that any sign of a race issue in the words of anyone other than him is racist in some way.
I started thinking about this when I read up on Lee's views of two of my favorite directors: Clint Eastwood and Quentin Tarantino.
1. Spike believes that Quentin Tarantino secretly craves a black heritage made evident by the writer director's constant use of the word "nigger" in his movies, mostly by white guys and by Tarantino himself at one darkly comedic point in Pulp Fiction ("Storing dead niggers ain't my fuckin' business!"). Lee didn't notice that the people using the word were thieves and killers and I believe the word's use was simply to further punctuate that these are very vulgur bad guys who don't give a shit one way or another. In the "dead nigger storage scene" Tarantino's character was clearly good friends with Samuel L. Jackson's character and was speaking out of anger I think anyone could understand. The stories take place in Los Angeles, where Rodney King was smashed up on the road and people are known for being stereotypical and racist. Tarantino is also a well known fan of the blaxploitation genre and loves the movie "Coffy" so the fact that this childhood fascination made its way into the director's work is no real surprise. Often I think of Spike Lee and Quentin Tarantino as cinematic brothers seeing as how their films seem alike in dialogue, style, humour and characters. Bottom line: calm down Spike.
2. Spike stated his anger toward Clint Eastwood for "completely ignoring" the depiction of black US soldiers in his World War II film Flags of Our Fathers. Claiming even further he didn't see a single black soldier in that movie and that Eastwood is racist. Guess what Spike, I saw several black soldiers in that movie. In fact they are shown in a close up. Maybe you need new glasses. Eastwood was not directing Miracle At St. Anna he was directing Flags of Our Fathers about the men who raised the flag at Iwo Jima. I'm sorry Spike but these men were white. And yes I was sure horrified by Eastwood as Dirty Harry when the first criminals he killed in the movie turned out to be a gang of black thieves, even if the main villain was a psychotic white man. No I wasn't, because I can tell the difference between Dirty Harry and real life. Also the fact that Eastwood directed the movie Bird, a Charlie Parker biopic, which starred Forest Whitaker and a cast full of African American actors. Oh but I'm sure this was a ploy. Perhaps Eastwood's latest film Gran Torino was a big "Fuck you" towards Spike. Perhaps not. While Eastwood portrays himself as a man who is partial to racial slurs and jokes but does not hesitate to hang out with an Italian barber or bond with an Asian family. I can see Spike growlling "you beat me to it you old bastard" when learning that Eastwood's next project is a Nelson Mandela biopic starring Morgan Freeman. The next bottom line, calm the fuck down Spike.
I don't mean to say this to a guy I like and admire. But it's true, he is a bit stereotypical. You aren't racist or you wouldn't keep hiring John Turturro or even your own criticised Quentin Tarantino. I don't care how fuckin' epic Malcolm X was. I don't care if Inside Man destroyed a blockbuster like Ocean's Eleven. I don't care if you didn't agree with Charlton Heston either. I don't give a shit if we both praised Barack Obama. It doesn't excuse your frustrating behavior. Clint said to you before and I'll say it to you again, sometimes you need to "shut your face." Still, I more or less get what you are trying to say any other time. I conclude that while different not only in color we are both still "struggling men trying to keep our dicks hard in a cruel and harsh world." Your words not mine.
This has been a poor rant by Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- Buggin Out
Yes that quote is from Do The Right Thing. Why you ask? I love movies because I love to be entertained and invested into a story. I admire everyone who brings talant and craft to good movies. Most of all the directors. I often read up on these directors and learn how they mastered their work.
One such example, and incidentally the subject of this blog, is controversial and revered director Spike Lee. Here is a man who took to heart the sufferings of the African American culture. A man who saw racism being ignored and showed it to the ignorant. A man who has created intelligent, funny, dramatic and cheerfully vulgur films that more often than not stare social issues in the face. This all sounds great. I thought so. Thing about Spike Lee is he is very touchy.
Maybe having such a well placed knowledge of racism has driven him paranoid and now he believes that any sign of a race issue in the words of anyone other than him is racist in some way.
I started thinking about this when I read up on Lee's views of two of my favorite directors: Clint Eastwood and Quentin Tarantino.
1. Spike believes that Quentin Tarantino secretly craves a black heritage made evident by the writer director's constant use of the word "nigger" in his movies, mostly by white guys and by Tarantino himself at one darkly comedic point in Pulp Fiction ("Storing dead niggers ain't my fuckin' business!"). Lee didn't notice that the people using the word were thieves and killers and I believe the word's use was simply to further punctuate that these are very vulgur bad guys who don't give a shit one way or another. In the "dead nigger storage scene" Tarantino's character was clearly good friends with Samuel L. Jackson's character and was speaking out of anger I think anyone could understand. The stories take place in Los Angeles, where Rodney King was smashed up on the road and people are known for being stereotypical and racist. Tarantino is also a well known fan of the blaxploitation genre and loves the movie "Coffy" so the fact that this childhood fascination made its way into the director's work is no real surprise. Often I think of Spike Lee and Quentin Tarantino as cinematic brothers seeing as how their films seem alike in dialogue, style, humour and characters. Bottom line: calm down Spike.
2. Spike stated his anger toward Clint Eastwood for "completely ignoring" the depiction of black US soldiers in his World War II film Flags of Our Fathers. Claiming even further he didn't see a single black soldier in that movie and that Eastwood is racist. Guess what Spike, I saw several black soldiers in that movie. In fact they are shown in a close up. Maybe you need new glasses. Eastwood was not directing Miracle At St. Anna he was directing Flags of Our Fathers about the men who raised the flag at Iwo Jima. I'm sorry Spike but these men were white. And yes I was sure horrified by Eastwood as Dirty Harry when the first criminals he killed in the movie turned out to be a gang of black thieves, even if the main villain was a psychotic white man. No I wasn't, because I can tell the difference between Dirty Harry and real life. Also the fact that Eastwood directed the movie Bird, a Charlie Parker biopic, which starred Forest Whitaker and a cast full of African American actors. Oh but I'm sure this was a ploy. Perhaps Eastwood's latest film Gran Torino was a big "Fuck you" towards Spike. Perhaps not. While Eastwood portrays himself as a man who is partial to racial slurs and jokes but does not hesitate to hang out with an Italian barber or bond with an Asian family. I can see Spike growlling "you beat me to it you old bastard" when learning that Eastwood's next project is a Nelson Mandela biopic starring Morgan Freeman. The next bottom line, calm the fuck down Spike.
I don't mean to say this to a guy I like and admire. But it's true, he is a bit stereotypical. You aren't racist or you wouldn't keep hiring John Turturro or even your own criticised Quentin Tarantino. I don't care how fuckin' epic Malcolm X was. I don't care if Inside Man destroyed a blockbuster like Ocean's Eleven. I don't care if you didn't agree with Charlton Heston either. I don't give a shit if we both praised Barack Obama. It doesn't excuse your frustrating behavior. Clint said to you before and I'll say it to you again, sometimes you need to "shut your face." Still, I more or less get what you are trying to say any other time. I conclude that while different not only in color we are both still "struggling men trying to keep our dicks hard in a cruel and harsh world." Your words not mine.
This has been a poor rant by Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Indiana, America's Toe
"...She grew up tall and she grew up right with them Indiana boys on those Indiana nights..."
- Tom Petty
For my first blog I'll simply rant about my place of origin. I know my opinions and views may vary as I age. I'm fifteen and have lived nowhere else so far. The only relavence I've found Indiana has with the rest of the country is a single highway that connects with it. Of course it's not always boring...I mean James Woods stopped at the Gas Grill just a short distance from where I lived one time. That's cool, I suppose.
The people are give or take. I'll take the friendly ones that are good for conversation and give the countless rednecks whose attention span seems to only exist within a universe of sports, quadbikes, and Chuck Norris television shows. And God help you if you say a derogatory word of Chuck Norris, who might as well be Christ's first cousin to them (he does look like an americanized version of him). Religion and Rednecks seem to go hand in hand in my area. If you aren't one of the two you're an outcast. I'm neither of the two, and to my surprise I'm not hanging from a tree. A lot of people however are friendly and just as intelligent as I am (not to say that I am really smart or anything). It's good and relieving to get into a deep thinking conversation with someone other than my parents. And very popular people have come out of this little spot such as Michael Jackson, Larry Bird, John Mellencamp, and Kurt Vonnegut (a favorite writer of mine).
I have lived in more than a few towns in my short life. I currently live in a town infamous for being the former victim of a tornado. Yay. Still the scenery of this state is what I really like about it. There are nice fields. Due to a lack of big city lights, we get some really beautiful sunrises and sunsets, night skies and stars. Should another tornado come swirling into my town and kill me and everyone else around, I'll at least have a helluva last horizon.
Indiana is a state of travel. A state of farmers and working families. Where people strive to be fair and sometimes surprise you. Sometimes you might have to pay the price by meeting viciously ignorant people, but still I wouldn't hesitate to stop off for a little while. I have my doubts about this place right now. It'll probably be strange when I leave.
This has been a few random thoughts from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
- Tom Petty
For my first blog I'll simply rant about my place of origin. I know my opinions and views may vary as I age. I'm fifteen and have lived nowhere else so far. The only relavence I've found Indiana has with the rest of the country is a single highway that connects with it. Of course it's not always boring...I mean James Woods stopped at the Gas Grill just a short distance from where I lived one time. That's cool, I suppose.
The people are give or take. I'll take the friendly ones that are good for conversation and give the countless rednecks whose attention span seems to only exist within a universe of sports, quadbikes, and Chuck Norris television shows. And God help you if you say a derogatory word of Chuck Norris, who might as well be Christ's first cousin to them (he does look like an americanized version of him). Religion and Rednecks seem to go hand in hand in my area. If you aren't one of the two you're an outcast. I'm neither of the two, and to my surprise I'm not hanging from a tree. A lot of people however are friendly and just as intelligent as I am (not to say that I am really smart or anything). It's good and relieving to get into a deep thinking conversation with someone other than my parents. And very popular people have come out of this little spot such as Michael Jackson, Larry Bird, John Mellencamp, and Kurt Vonnegut (a favorite writer of mine).
I have lived in more than a few towns in my short life. I currently live in a town infamous for being the former victim of a tornado. Yay. Still the scenery of this state is what I really like about it. There are nice fields. Due to a lack of big city lights, we get some really beautiful sunrises and sunsets, night skies and stars. Should another tornado come swirling into my town and kill me and everyone else around, I'll at least have a helluva last horizon.
Indiana is a state of travel. A state of farmers and working families. Where people strive to be fair and sometimes surprise you. Sometimes you might have to pay the price by meeting viciously ignorant people, but still I wouldn't hesitate to stop off for a little while. I have my doubts about this place right now. It'll probably be strange when I leave.
This has been a few random thoughts from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
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