"You must make a friend horror. Horror and absolute terror...Are friends. If they are not...Than they are enemies to be feared." - Colonel Kurtz
As you may have noticed my last few blog posts have been about particularly spooky things such as Silent Hill, scary movies, the Saw series and Rush Limbaugh of course. This is because we are approaching one of my favorite nights of the year, Halloween. I love this night, well I actually love its meaning. It is the one time in the year where mankind is allowed to celebrate evil and darkness. If God is real he was probably one day just like "Okay fuck it, they're gonna do it anyway. Maybe if I give them just one night to blow off steam and let it all out that'll be the end of it." Yeah many of us were still evil after the first Halloween, but all of us thought it was fun. So to continue this cycle of fear, I will divulge some of the scariest scares I've seen in movies. So now, in honor of Samhain and Halloween Night, this is my top ten movie scares.
SPOILER WARNING
10. The pawn shop basement scene from Pulp Fiction
"Bring out The Gimp."
This is kind of cheating I know, because a lot people find this scene to be hilarious. So do I, but that's just it. Some of the funniest things seem really disturbing, and this scene is one of the most disturbing scenes that seems really funny. In a film that caught a lot of people off guard with it's plot points, this one probably did it the best. It comes out of nowhere! Okay, so a boxer cheats a gangster out of a deal they made and somehow the two see each other on the street. They get into a huge destructive fight in the middle of Los Angeles and eventually the two wind up at each other's throats in some random pawn shop. Just as one is about to kill the other, the hillbilly pawn shop owner Maynard pulls a shotgun and knocks them both out. When they wake up they are in the basement, bound to chairs and ball gagged. A security guard and friend of Maynard's named Zed shows up. That's when they bring out The Gimp: a man turned gitty human slave covered head to toe in bondage leather who lives in a box in the floor. After a game of enie meanie minie moe, the gangster is taken in the back room and raped by Zed and Maynard while the boxer is left with The Gimp. Most of my readers probably know how they get out of this predictament, so I'll just say it's even stranger. So yeah, this scene is darkly humourous but also just a totally horrifying thought and situation. It's the worst case of bad luck in the history of fictional stories.
9. The death of Frank from Hellraiser
"Jeeesuuus wept!"
If a movie goes beyond the level of gore as Hellrasier, that's where I draw the line. So to sum up this particular scene, Frank is a depraved adventurer who finds a puzzle box that is said to be the key to unimaginable pleasure. Little did Frank know, there are many different ideas of pleasure. Okay let's just say when Frank solved the puzzle, masters of agony and agents of Hell called Cenobites appear and mutilate Frank. His sister in law and lover manages to bring him back to life later by killing unsuspecting potential lovers for Frank to drain of blood and flesh. The Cenobites use Frank's indebted neice to find him again. When they do, they send chains tearing into every part of his body and once again mutilating him. After laughing bitterly at his own misfortune, The Cenobites rip Frank apart. This may be one of the goriest things I have ever seen. It's just astounding how bloody and painful it is. It hurt me it was so bad. I'm lucky to be uncertain and unconfident and bad at puzzles, so I will never be indebted to The Cenobites. Then again, I swear to God that is the easiest puzzle in the world to solve.
8. The intruder scene from The Strangers
"Because you were home."
This whole movie really gave me the creeps. That's saying something because this is a modern horror movie and most modern horror movies suck. The Strangers got back to the basics with a slasher movie. It is largely inspired by 1978's Halloween. This scene takes place right before the three attackers decide to totally invade the house. So the Liv Tyler character's boyfriend, played by Scott Speedman, goes out for a drive and leaves her alone at the house. She pretty much just hangs out bored. So after she gets off the phone with him and lights a smoke, right in the background some guy walks out from the front entrance corridor. He's tall, wears a suit and a ghost like hood over his face. All he does is stare at her and she doesn't notice him as she does the dishes. So finally after a moment of staring at her, he leaves and lets her know he's there by closing the front door loudly. It just sets the mood for the rest of the film and makes your skin crawl. People complained about how mysterious the strangers were, but this scene tells you a lot. He's there in plain sight just watching her because he wants to know how easy it is to slip in and out. The fact that someone can just walk into your house takes away your sense of security, it makes you feel vulnerable and that's what horror movies should do. The rest of this movie is scary but this scene most definitely is.
7. The room check scene from Poltergeist
"They're heeeree."
I know this is basically a jump scare but holy shit if it isn't one of the best jump scares ever. Alright ghosts are haunting this very very normal suburban house. At first it's all of these weird little things that everyone finds odd or kinda cool (chairs stacking themselves fast as light or things sliding across the floor, daughter talking to TV static), then before you know it your electrical system has tourettes, clown toys go Chucky, corpses shoot from your unfinished pool and a fucking tree tries to swallow your son. But the big thing is that the little daughter is sucked into a portal in her closet meanwhile the rest of her room turns into the center of chaos. Seriously you don't know what new freaky shit is going on in that room. The family begins to get used to all of the freaky little things and really get used to not going into the kid's room. But at one point, one pretty random point, the mom comes walking by the door with a basket of laundry. She stops and listens, listens next to the door. There doesn't seem to be any sound from inside at all. She calls her daughter's name softly. Oh my god is there hope? Could she be back? Might everything inside be...Normal? The hopeful mom, gently opens the door before the most UNHOLIEST OF UNHOLY SCREAMS HOWL FROM INSIDE AND SLAM THE DOOR SHUT BEFORE IT GETS AN INCH OPEN! Then silence again as the mom falls to her knees in tears and apologizing. It was like the ghosts were saying "Oh you have hope, you think you're gonna get her back. Well fuck you!" This scene could be seen as kind of funny, or extremely freaky, or really heartbreaking or all three like me. It's a jump scare but THE BEST jump scare.
6. The opening scene from Jaws
"Dun, dun, dun, dun, DUN DUN, DUN DUN!"
The scariest part of Jaws is at the first part where two people, a young man and a young woman chase each other out to the beach. She strips and swims into the water, meanwhile he passes out intoxicated. While she's out enjoying herself, a shark drifts uncomfortably close to her. All of a sudden we see her struggling to stay above water, her expressions going from shocked, to horrified, to frantic. She's is thrown all across the water screaming into finally her pleas for help are drowned out by the water as she goes under. And this is at the beginning of the movie. The thing everybody loves about this movie is how you almost never see the shark. In this scene you only see the girl struggling. This is all acting. We feel the bite the first time she's forced under. It's extremely intense. The most horrifying things are usually the real things.
5. Samara kills Noah from The Ring
"Seven Days!"
God this movie is the epitomie of why movies scare me. It's a goddamn bullet to every sense in your body. So after what must have been 2 hours of disturbing and surreal imagry, frightening events, ghostly occurances, one evil videotape, and one even more evil undead little girl, we are led to believe all is right and we will be left with a sweet and cozy little ending. BUT OH NO! This little dead bitch just wouldn't give up! So yeah when Aiden a.k.a. Haley Joel Osment impersonater a.k.a. creepy kid number 2 informs that all is not well and our evil little girl we thought was in the past "never sleeps". Yeah, you dropped the ball on that one Naomi Watts. Throughout the whole movie your son has been the well informed one, your son knew about this little girl, your son made contact with this little girl but you never even dreamed of getting the answers out of him. And look what it got you, look what it got the audience. ONE OF THE FREAKIEST SCENES EVER! So the secondary hero played Martin Henderson has already gone back to his normal life, oblivious of what creepy Aiden has revealed. Then his TV starts coming on and won't turn off. Eventually it starts to show the end of the cursed videotape (which up until now has just showed a well and then cut to black). But the seven days are up and, as the TV leaks water, our evil little dead girl Samara rises from the well and proceeds to walk out of the television. She shows off some freakishly insane powers and then pulls her hair back, showing Noah her grotesque face. End scene. That was the first time I have ever put my hands over my face in a movie. To describe what happened to Noah: well just imagine the expression the most innocent person in the world has while watching the 2 girls 1 cup video, now imagine that person dies with the expression still on his face. That would be about what Noah looked like afterward.
4. The first head turn scene from The Exorcist
"The sow is mine!"
Okay, every time you hear a noise from Reagan McNeil's room you know immediately it is not a good thing. This time her demonic possession comes to a head when her mother and doctors burst into the room to investigate horrific noises. They find Reagan, shifting from her brutalized personality to the cruel demon personality, violently masturbating with a crucifix. When everyone tries to intervene, furniture starts moving, knocking people down and blocking the door. After a moment, the girl's smiling head turns all the way around and talks to the mother in a voice totally unlike Reagan's. Needless to say, they didn't go into the room much after that. Except when the exorcism began. What more can I say? This scene is just fucked up. The whole movie is like this but this one just stands out the most. The only other one I think matches up is when the possessed girl is sleeping, and the maid and Father Karris find the words "HELP ME" written from inside the stomach. That's some sick shit. This movie is terrifying. This scene belongs on this list.
3. The opening scene from Scream
"I wanna know who I'm looking at."
This scary movie, written by the creator of Dawson's Creek, starts out very innocently. Drew Barrymore's character gets a call from some guy who dials the wrong number. He apologizes but tries to keep the conversation going. They talk about scary movies and maybe even a little get together. That is before she realizes he's near and watching her. Eventually a game ensues as the girl has to play a little movie trivia or else she and her boyfriend, who is tied to a chair outside, will be killed. She does well for awhile despite the pressure, before the caller disembowels her boyfriend and starts stalking her around the house. Her parents arrive just as she is stabbed to death and hung from a tree by the killer known as Ghostface. This scene is all too intense and very terrifying. The worst part is the last question he asks her: "what door am I at?" You know he's at the one closest to her but the suspense is still there. Plus they get a huge star like Drew Barrymore, the little girl from E.T. who is the image of bright and sweet (and long ago of Hollywood junkies), and you see her mentally tortured and then torn apart by a psychopath. That is one helluva way to open your scary movie. The rest of the movie has it's scares, but this just gut wrenches you from the getgo.
2. Laurie investigating the Wallace house from Halloween
"This has most definitely stopped being funny!"
Halloween is a prime example of a sleeper hit. It was a B-movie made with a smaller than small budget in the 70s as a small time action filmmaker's studio assignment. John Carpenter said he was given the hook and it was his job to get the line and sink. And oh he did. He created a movie that was the basis for every slasher film from Friday the 13th to Saw. Halloween was a movie that was designed with some of the most creative scares. Be it pinning Bob to the wall with a knife (when Michael Myers brilliantly tilts his head as if he were looking at a painting) or when he dresses up in a bedsheet and glasses and strangles Linda with a phone line (and then listens to the other line, humanly). The scariest scene for me probably comes when Laurie realizes her friends are not answering her calls and all the lights keeping going on and off across the street. She goes to see what's up and enters the darkened house. Upstairs she enters the master bedroom and finds her best friend Annie sprawled on the bed, throat slashed. The tombstone of Michael's sister sits above the bed in a ritualistic fashion. In a sequence I call the Recoil Effect, Laurie recoils against the door in shock only to have Bob's corpse fling from the ceiling at her with big dead eyes, she recoils again against the closet only to have the closet door open and reveal Linda's strangled body. Laurie runs from the room screaming and crying. In a stunning lighting technique, Michael's masked face brightens slowly in the darkness and then lunges out after her, then ensues one of the best horror movie chases ever. I like this chase because it is possible for the slow moving Michael to catch up with Laurie because she's cracked her ankle (in any other movie the walking killer would just somehow catch up with you even if you were a track star). The ending scenes in the other house are scary and thrilling too but just the horrific nature in the bedroom was too much. I mean, what the hell was Michael thinking? I honestly would've liked the movie to stand alone without a franchise. The movie ends opened but so well it didn't require a sequel. In the end you are just left with the plot that Michael has disappeared and as we pan out to every place he's been seen at we only hear his strained breathing and we are left with the thought that he is still out there. And that's a good note to end on.
1. The third night from The Blair Witch Project
"What the fuck is that?!"
Probably the scariest movie of all time for me and one of my favorites. If this movie had been presented in a standard form of cinematography, I think it would lose its effect. Shot in the documentary style, The Blair Witch Project's primary tone is realism. This movie feels very real and was advertised as if it were real. Now I could sum up every woodland scene in this movie as either extremely involving or extremely terrifying. The witch or serial killer ghost or whatever the hell is out there in the darkness gets worse every night. You have the first night events in which indistinct noises come from the distance. It sounds like people banging rocks together all over the place. Then intense daylight scenes in which the gang seems to have impossibly gone in a circle or when they find a huge section in the woods decorated with stick figures (that were probably made overnight). The most terrifying scene for me, next to the ending, is the third night in which the crew wakes up in their tent and hear noises outside. It sounds like kids whispering or laughing. Then suddenly it appears as if the "kids" are banging on the sides of the tent or trying to trample it. Scared shitless, the gang does what anyone else would do: they rush from the tent and far into the night screaming like hell. I swear I heard one of the kids calling after them. The girl Heather sees something horrifying while she's running, but everyone's too busy running to even bother trying to film it. I once saw a glare at this point that made me think it was one gigantic stick figure hanging in the trees but I don't know. All I know is in this scene you have no idea what the hell it could be but it is heart stopping. These cameras aren't designed to pick up the big Hollywood visuals, so we basically rely on the sounds. And by god there are sounds in this movie. This movie rode my emotions and my capacity of bravery to the limits. Knowing what your enemy is is a comfort as you can learn about it and find a weakness. The Blair Witch Project is, like Jaws, a movie that raises the question of just what the hell is it?
So while these may not totally be my top scares, they are certainly some of my favorite. They are the scenes that define fear for me. But don't take my word for it. This all sounds so metallic as a blog post but on the screen it puts up the chill factor. See these movies and other scary movies. It's fun to be scared, its a rush. Your Modest Guru is imploring you to get scared and get scary for this Halloween.
This has been a ghoulish top ten from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Paranormal Activity Review
"What the fuck!" - Majority of Paranormal Activity dialogue
Okay I went into this movie with few expectations. I expected it to make me jump, and it did. I did not expect it to frighten me or interest me, but it did. Paranormal Activity follows the trend of horror viewed realistically through a home camera, where the characters are filming the strange goings on. This of course takes more from 1999's Blair Witch Project more than 2007's action thriller Cloverfield, both movies I totally dig.
What is Paranormal Activity about? It is about paranormal activity. Okay to give you a premise, the movie opens as Micah gets the hang of a new video camera so that he can document the supernatural occurances surrounding his girlfriend Katie, who has been experiening them since she was a little girl. They set up the camera in their room so that they can record whatever ghostly visitors or events show up in their room. And do strange things happen? Hell yes. It gets freaky and unsettling. The fact that you can't see whatever it is that is doing these things makes it even scarier, you just see what it is doing and what it's doing to the girl. Instead of movie full of bad: bad acting, bad screenplay, bad direction, bad everything, we get a movie that is good in almost all of its aspects. The actors movie who play the couple are pretty good and seemed plausible enough, not as well as the Blair Witch bunch but they did well. The girl plays a real bright personalitied and eversweet girl who had the bad luck of becoming the brutalized ragdoll of some cruel demon. Did I say hot? Because she is. I know it's kind of a given in modern horror movies these days, but she isn't a skinny as shit beach blonde honey straight off the set of Sorority Row. She is a realistic kind of hot, the kind of good looking girl a sad bastard like me would hope to bag. And the guy was great. His character is just hysterical. Sure he went from being a not so serious kind of a douche to an understanding guardian again and again. But I thought he was just funny. I think his dialogue could be summed up like this "What the fuck was that?", "Whose there?", and "Is that all you got? Come out, bitch!" The humour is probably unintentional, but it's still humour. That's good, I don't like horror movies totally grim.
Now part of my criticism before seeing this movie was that the critics and filmgoer reactions to it, some of them were calling this movie the scariest movie ever. Let it be said this movie is scary, it is jumpy, it is creepy and disturbing but it is no way shape or form THE scariest movie ever. Plus part of the marketing for Paranormal Activity involved the trailers being partly scenes from the movie itself that provide you with the basics and of course most of the scares. The other half is audience reactions in the screenings. In the trailer, whenever there was a loud noise, a bunch of younger people jump in their seats and hold their hands over their mouthes in terror. Let it be said these kids, clad in hoodies (hoods up in the theatre), are probably easily scared and their idea of intense reality TV is Ghost Hunters. Now one could argue that Paranormal Activity itself is Ghost Hunters The Movie. It's not Ghost Hunters. It's Ghost Hunters done right. Here we have a clear view (really clear due to invisibility) of what is happening whereas in Ghost Hunters you hear the floor creak in the dark and it's supernatural. Sorry, I just think Ghost Hunters is retarded.
Moving on, there are few movies in which I get back from it and I say that I was on the edge of my seat. I'm relaxed when I'm watching movies, especially action movies, I can have the most gargantuan Michael Bay EXPLOSIONS Boeing Jet my eyes and Ride of the Valkries destroying my ear drums and think I was in a peaceful meadow. But that's just me, you know. Yet this movie had me on the edge. Partially because I was really into it, but basically because I'm looking at the screen with my expressions changing like this: "W. T. F. Wait what! How the fu-Holy shit! What!" And that is a good feeling when watching a horror film. When you're not quite sure what the movie's doing to you as well as the characters, you're in suspense and I love suspense like I love vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup. I don't fuck around when it comes to vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup.
I will leave off by saying that to me Paranormal Activity was a very entertaining horror film. Now this type of horror may not appeal to some people, but those are people who can't stand scary movies without needlessly excessive gore, done to death stories, bad actors, and plenty of T&A. They are people whose idea of horror is distorted and think the real scares are shit. They are the people who would rather see Saw VI. Their loss. I'm not Your Modest Guru for nothing. Go see this film and come home and be afraid to get in bed or turn off the lights or walk through your house or have a girlfriend. You'll thank me for it later.
This has been a horrificly structured movie review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Okay I went into this movie with few expectations. I expected it to make me jump, and it did. I did not expect it to frighten me or interest me, but it did. Paranormal Activity follows the trend of horror viewed realistically through a home camera, where the characters are filming the strange goings on. This of course takes more from 1999's Blair Witch Project more than 2007's action thriller Cloverfield, both movies I totally dig.
What is Paranormal Activity about? It is about paranormal activity. Okay to give you a premise, the movie opens as Micah gets the hang of a new video camera so that he can document the supernatural occurances surrounding his girlfriend Katie, who has been experiening them since she was a little girl. They set up the camera in their room so that they can record whatever ghostly visitors or events show up in their room. And do strange things happen? Hell yes. It gets freaky and unsettling. The fact that you can't see whatever it is that is doing these things makes it even scarier, you just see what it is doing and what it's doing to the girl. Instead of movie full of bad: bad acting, bad screenplay, bad direction, bad everything, we get a movie that is good in almost all of its aspects. The actors movie who play the couple are pretty good and seemed plausible enough, not as well as the Blair Witch bunch but they did well. The girl plays a real bright personalitied and eversweet girl who had the bad luck of becoming the brutalized ragdoll of some cruel demon. Did I say hot? Because she is. I know it's kind of a given in modern horror movies these days, but she isn't a skinny as shit beach blonde honey straight off the set of Sorority Row. She is a realistic kind of hot, the kind of good looking girl a sad bastard like me would hope to bag. And the guy was great. His character is just hysterical. Sure he went from being a not so serious kind of a douche to an understanding guardian again and again. But I thought he was just funny. I think his dialogue could be summed up like this "What the fuck was that?", "Whose there?", and "Is that all you got? Come out, bitch!" The humour is probably unintentional, but it's still humour. That's good, I don't like horror movies totally grim.
Now part of my criticism before seeing this movie was that the critics and filmgoer reactions to it, some of them were calling this movie the scariest movie ever. Let it be said this movie is scary, it is jumpy, it is creepy and disturbing but it is no way shape or form THE scariest movie ever. Plus part of the marketing for Paranormal Activity involved the trailers being partly scenes from the movie itself that provide you with the basics and of course most of the scares. The other half is audience reactions in the screenings. In the trailer, whenever there was a loud noise, a bunch of younger people jump in their seats and hold their hands over their mouthes in terror. Let it be said these kids, clad in hoodies (hoods up in the theatre), are probably easily scared and their idea of intense reality TV is Ghost Hunters. Now one could argue that Paranormal Activity itself is Ghost Hunters The Movie. It's not Ghost Hunters. It's Ghost Hunters done right. Here we have a clear view (really clear due to invisibility) of what is happening whereas in Ghost Hunters you hear the floor creak in the dark and it's supernatural. Sorry, I just think Ghost Hunters is retarded.
Moving on, there are few movies in which I get back from it and I say that I was on the edge of my seat. I'm relaxed when I'm watching movies, especially action movies, I can have the most gargantuan Michael Bay EXPLOSIONS Boeing Jet my eyes and Ride of the Valkries destroying my ear drums and think I was in a peaceful meadow. But that's just me, you know. Yet this movie had me on the edge. Partially because I was really into it, but basically because I'm looking at the screen with my expressions changing like this: "W. T. F. Wait what! How the fu-Holy shit! What!" And that is a good feeling when watching a horror film. When you're not quite sure what the movie's doing to you as well as the characters, you're in suspense and I love suspense like I love vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup. I don't fuck around when it comes to vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup.
I will leave off by saying that to me Paranormal Activity was a very entertaining horror film. Now this type of horror may not appeal to some people, but those are people who can't stand scary movies without needlessly excessive gore, done to death stories, bad actors, and plenty of T&A. They are people whose idea of horror is distorted and think the real scares are shit. They are the people who would rather see Saw VI. Their loss. I'm not Your Modest Guru for nothing. Go see this film and come home and be afraid to get in bed or turn off the lights or walk through your house or have a girlfriend. You'll thank me for it later.
This has been a horrificly structured movie review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Modest PSA # 3: Sawophrenia
DISCLAIMER: THIS PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT IS NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM EVEN THOUGH IT PROBABLY SHOULD BE.
Hi there, I'm Your Modest Guru and I've come today to talk about a trend of filmmaking that is destroying the profitable business world of Hollywood. The Saw film franchise will simply not die, this is becoming apparent with the recent release of the sixth installment in the series and preparations being made for seven and eight. Though the torture experts involved with making the films have said that the series will conclude with the eighth chapter, mankind still lives in fear that another redundant movie might just rise from the ashes and rob the jacked up retards, splat pack junkies, and Alzhiemers victims who keep coming to the new Saw films knowing that they will be getting almost the exact same experience. Elaborate traps that do nothing but mindlessly mutilate, a plot that grows more tedious and intricate, and even good acting by Tobin Bell becomes more and more hard to stand as time goes on and money is wasted in developing these films and buying the tickets to see them.
If you're looking for relief, talk to your Doctor or local movie critic about Saw and other forms of torture porn. Known cures have been found in viewings of films like A Clockwork Orange and Rosemary's Baby. If you're going to desensitized to violence, shouldn't the violence at least be good? Whose to say? But there is one thing we know for certain: what we don't need is more Saw films. Indeed we don't. Less we wish to see the end a promising new generation of non cutters.
And now you know and knowing is half the battle. The rest Your Modest Guru leaves to you. Thanks for reading.
Hi there, I'm Your Modest Guru and I've come today to talk about a trend of filmmaking that is destroying the profitable business world of Hollywood. The Saw film franchise will simply not die, this is becoming apparent with the recent release of the sixth installment in the series and preparations being made for seven and eight. Though the torture experts involved with making the films have said that the series will conclude with the eighth chapter, mankind still lives in fear that another redundant movie might just rise from the ashes and rob the jacked up retards, splat pack junkies, and Alzhiemers victims who keep coming to the new Saw films knowing that they will be getting almost the exact same experience. Elaborate traps that do nothing but mindlessly mutilate, a plot that grows more tedious and intricate, and even good acting by Tobin Bell becomes more and more hard to stand as time goes on and money is wasted in developing these films and buying the tickets to see them.
If you're looking for relief, talk to your Doctor or local movie critic about Saw and other forms of torture porn. Known cures have been found in viewings of films like A Clockwork Orange and Rosemary's Baby. If you're going to desensitized to violence, shouldn't the violence at least be good? Whose to say? But there is one thing we know for certain: what we don't need is more Saw films. Indeed we don't. Less we wish to see the end a promising new generation of non cutters.
And now you know and knowing is half the battle. The rest Your Modest Guru leaves to you. Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Silent Hill: Homecoming Review
"Everybody's gone." - Lillian Shepherd
Silent Hill is probably one of the most popular Japanese survival horror franchises ever, maybe even surpassing Resident Evil franchise. It is known for it's haunting tone, it's surreal and grotesque imagery and villians, it's psychologically deep stories, and it's flawed utterly human characters. I bought and played Silent Hill 2 when I was younger without much prior knowledge about the franchise beforehand, and I wasn't even a third of the way through it before I was scared and stumped. It was truly complex and terrifying. I wish I had finished it.
Nearly every story revolves somewhat around a game's protagonist being drawn to the town of Silent Hill, a place they have vague but somewhat good memories of. In Silent Hill 2's case it was the deceased wife of the main character who writes him a letter beckoning him back to the town. Once the player arrives in town they find it damp and gloomy, with endless ash-like fog looming, few people around, and hideous creatures lurking in the streets and shadows. Shameful to say, I have watched the online walkthroughs of games 2 and 4: The Room and did not play them myself. The experience is still interesting and intense but not like it would be if played. Finally I decided to play a Silent Hill game all the way through, so I went with the lastest chapter Silent Hill: Homecoming.
Now this game received mixed reviews on the grounds of being too predictable and slightly more action based (due to the fact that this game was American developed). The trailer really grabbed my attention, it looked more like a trailer for a movie. This tale revolves around Alex Shepherd, a young war veteren who was recently released from a hospital after being wounded. He begins having dreams about his kid brother Joshua in danger and sets out to his hometown of Shepherd's Glen (a town bordering Silent Hill) to make sure he's safe. Upon arrival, Alex finds Joshua and his Sheriff father missing and his mother almost totally unresponsive. Shepherd's Glen is also plagued by monsters and clues of these happenings and his brother's whereabouts begin to lead back to Silent Hill.
I found the game to be a delight. I liked the stories and adored the visuals and moving score. Criticism was given toward the main character Alex being to deadly, therefore making it easier to kill monsters, unlike the other game protagonists who were average ordinary people who may have to run away. Sure it is realistic, but in a game where monsters are coming at you the first instinct isn't to run away but to attack and kill them. Plus Alex is a far better upgrade than the very bland characters of James and Henry from Silent Hills 2 and 4. This probably due to his voice actor, Brian Bloom, who is good with live action as well. He carries real emotion in his gruff voice and conveys that into the character. If you know Silent Hill well, odds are you probably know how this is going to end. But that's another good thing about this game, there are multiple endings, a few of which may really surprise you. The ending itself still impacts you and makes you feel as I'm sure every other Silent Hill has done. The action is good too, gritty and intense. With creatures as crafty and dangerous as these, you kind of have to be an experienced fighter like Alex.
In the end, I really enjoyed the hell out of this game. If I had one complaint it would be that it is a bit too easy. I beat it in about a week, playing it an hour or two a day. Even so it's still enjoyable. And did I say scary? It is, not as scary as Silent Hill 2 but really freaky. It's a fun game to play and it's worth a purchase. Not that I'm advertising or anything.
This has been a video game review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Silent Hill is probably one of the most popular Japanese survival horror franchises ever, maybe even surpassing Resident Evil franchise. It is known for it's haunting tone, it's surreal and grotesque imagery and villians, it's psychologically deep stories, and it's flawed utterly human characters. I bought and played Silent Hill 2 when I was younger without much prior knowledge about the franchise beforehand, and I wasn't even a third of the way through it before I was scared and stumped. It was truly complex and terrifying. I wish I had finished it.
Nearly every story revolves somewhat around a game's protagonist being drawn to the town of Silent Hill, a place they have vague but somewhat good memories of. In Silent Hill 2's case it was the deceased wife of the main character who writes him a letter beckoning him back to the town. Once the player arrives in town they find it damp and gloomy, with endless ash-like fog looming, few people around, and hideous creatures lurking in the streets and shadows. Shameful to say, I have watched the online walkthroughs of games 2 and 4: The Room and did not play them myself. The experience is still interesting and intense but not like it would be if played. Finally I decided to play a Silent Hill game all the way through, so I went with the lastest chapter Silent Hill: Homecoming.
Now this game received mixed reviews on the grounds of being too predictable and slightly more action based (due to the fact that this game was American developed). The trailer really grabbed my attention, it looked more like a trailer for a movie. This tale revolves around Alex Shepherd, a young war veteren who was recently released from a hospital after being wounded. He begins having dreams about his kid brother Joshua in danger and sets out to his hometown of Shepherd's Glen (a town bordering Silent Hill) to make sure he's safe. Upon arrival, Alex finds Joshua and his Sheriff father missing and his mother almost totally unresponsive. Shepherd's Glen is also plagued by monsters and clues of these happenings and his brother's whereabouts begin to lead back to Silent Hill.
I found the game to be a delight. I liked the stories and adored the visuals and moving score. Criticism was given toward the main character Alex being to deadly, therefore making it easier to kill monsters, unlike the other game protagonists who were average ordinary people who may have to run away. Sure it is realistic, but in a game where monsters are coming at you the first instinct isn't to run away but to attack and kill them. Plus Alex is a far better upgrade than the very bland characters of James and Henry from Silent Hills 2 and 4. This probably due to his voice actor, Brian Bloom, who is good with live action as well. He carries real emotion in his gruff voice and conveys that into the character. If you know Silent Hill well, odds are you probably know how this is going to end. But that's another good thing about this game, there are multiple endings, a few of which may really surprise you. The ending itself still impacts you and makes you feel as I'm sure every other Silent Hill has done. The action is good too, gritty and intense. With creatures as crafty and dangerous as these, you kind of have to be an experienced fighter like Alex.
In the end, I really enjoyed the hell out of this game. If I had one complaint it would be that it is a bit too easy. I beat it in about a week, playing it an hour or two a day. Even so it's still enjoyable. And did I say scary? It is, not as scary as Silent Hill 2 but really freaky. It's a fun game to play and it's worth a purchase. Not that I'm advertising or anything.
This has been a video game review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Rush Limbaugh...How I loathe thee
"Rush Limbaugh. A man. A legend. A way of life." - Rush Limbaugh
If you don't hate him after that, then you kind of have to read this. I've been building up the courage to do a Rush Limbaugh post for some time now. That's not to say I'm afraid of Rush Limbaugh (that is when he isn't popping pills), I just kind of cringe to think about him let alone write a blog post about him.
Where do we start? Hmm... First off he's an asshole. So there you go. That just kind of segues into everything else I've got to say. For those of you lucky enough not to know, Rush Limbaugh is one of the top political radio personalities in America. For the mindless conservative elite that is. Rush is the disgusting face of the conservative media's reign over those drones out there in the so called land of the free. If you're not conservative or if you don't agree with him you're not American he says primarily. Rush could be a reference when looking up the word "bias". Recently he has been known for his nonstop attacks on the current President Barack Obama, calling him Halfrican American and claiming that his campaign success is based on Affrimative Action (a word Limbaugh uses frequently when discussing "them coloreds"). I'll go into his protruding racism in a minute, but first I'll tell you about this one particular stunt he pulled during the last Presidential Election. In a movement called Operation Chaos, a movement designed specifically to spite the Democratic Party, our last patriot Rush Limbaugh urged his listeners to vote for whichever campaign is losing the most...Noooo, he's not biased at all.
Now on to claims of racism. In one day alone, I have read ten Rush rants that sound pretty damn demeaning to our darker American friends. I despise racism, I despise racists even more. Sometimes I try to see past it when the racist has other redeeming qualities and isn't so damn crazy about it. Unsurprisingly Rush Limbaugh is not one of those people. Here's a man who describes the time of slavery as "safer", who says that all composite pictures of serial killers look like Al Sharpton (another of his black enemies), and that the African Americans amount to 12 percent of the population and goes on to say "who the hell cares" about them. Asshole, anyone?
Oh yes and let's not forget his over the top sadism. You know the kind of massive annihilate everyone not white and rich and agrees with me code that every other conservative media personality has adopted since 9/11. He describes the torture of Iraqi prisoners in places like Guantanomo Bay as a sort of hazing and a way to let off steam and "fun" for the torturous soldiers. What is wrong with this guy? Why does the Right Wing stick up for him? Some Republican Party members are even disgusted with him, but if they dare breathe a word of disdain toward him he's on the whole party like a wildebeast and then the higher ups in the party force an apology. He's a fucking radio personality! You are politicians! Screw his reign over listeners, you have the power. Fuck, Limbaugh pisses me off so much that I've started to show sympathy for Republicans. God he makes me sick!
Oh but let's not forget his problems, you know, aside from his opinions. He is a total hypocrite, claiming that "too many whites are getting away with drug use" and so on and so bullshit, when in fact Limmy finally became a kite with the body full of hot air and prescription drugs. And did he go high? Oh yeah. Let's not forget that awkward moment at CPAC when, during a speech, Rush seemed to be suffering from uncontrollable bouncing. Seriously, watch the video. The fat bastard becomes a fucking bobble head. I know Keith Olbermann used that already, but I just couldn't resist. Also what are these claims that the American mainstream media is biased liberally. Fox News is one of the most powerful media industries in the country and they're even crazier than you as far as Right Wing states of mind go. It's just like the Right complaining about the Left having Hollywood in their pockets. Seriously? You're saying this after having several actor politicians in your pockets, one of which was a goddamn president. And as a side note, has anyone noticed that when he speaks he tries so sound as epic as possible. Like he were reading the ten commandments, or mimicking General Patton. When I hear him speak, I think of that famous scene from Network with Ned Beatty getting all furious. "YOU HAVE MEDDLED WITH THE PRIMAL FORCES OF NATURE!!!" They even look alike, except Ned Beatty looks presentable.
And you know what I could go on, but it just makes me too angry. Rush Limbaugh is hardly a man. Rush Limbaugh's legend is infamous at best. Rush Limbaugh is not a way of life, it's a way of self destruction that far too many people are following. In closing, Rush Limbaugh can blow me.
This has been a scary camp fire story from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
PS - sorry if it's been awhile.
If you don't hate him after that, then you kind of have to read this. I've been building up the courage to do a Rush Limbaugh post for some time now. That's not to say I'm afraid of Rush Limbaugh (that is when he isn't popping pills), I just kind of cringe to think about him let alone write a blog post about him.
Where do we start? Hmm... First off he's an asshole. So there you go. That just kind of segues into everything else I've got to say. For those of you lucky enough not to know, Rush Limbaugh is one of the top political radio personalities in America. For the mindless conservative elite that is. Rush is the disgusting face of the conservative media's reign over those drones out there in the so called land of the free. If you're not conservative or if you don't agree with him you're not American he says primarily. Rush could be a reference when looking up the word "bias". Recently he has been known for his nonstop attacks on the current President Barack Obama, calling him Halfrican American and claiming that his campaign success is based on Affrimative Action (a word Limbaugh uses frequently when discussing "them coloreds"). I'll go into his protruding racism in a minute, but first I'll tell you about this one particular stunt he pulled during the last Presidential Election. In a movement called Operation Chaos, a movement designed specifically to spite the Democratic Party, our last patriot Rush Limbaugh urged his listeners to vote for whichever campaign is losing the most...Noooo, he's not biased at all.
Now on to claims of racism. In one day alone, I have read ten Rush rants that sound pretty damn demeaning to our darker American friends. I despise racism, I despise racists even more. Sometimes I try to see past it when the racist has other redeeming qualities and isn't so damn crazy about it. Unsurprisingly Rush Limbaugh is not one of those people. Here's a man who describes the time of slavery as "safer", who says that all composite pictures of serial killers look like Al Sharpton (another of his black enemies), and that the African Americans amount to 12 percent of the population and goes on to say "who the hell cares" about them. Asshole, anyone?
Oh yes and let's not forget his over the top sadism. You know the kind of massive annihilate everyone not white and rich and agrees with me code that every other conservative media personality has adopted since 9/11. He describes the torture of Iraqi prisoners in places like Guantanomo Bay as a sort of hazing and a way to let off steam and "fun" for the torturous soldiers. What is wrong with this guy? Why does the Right Wing stick up for him? Some Republican Party members are even disgusted with him, but if they dare breathe a word of disdain toward him he's on the whole party like a wildebeast and then the higher ups in the party force an apology. He's a fucking radio personality! You are politicians! Screw his reign over listeners, you have the power. Fuck, Limbaugh pisses me off so much that I've started to show sympathy for Republicans. God he makes me sick!
Oh but let's not forget his problems, you know, aside from his opinions. He is a total hypocrite, claiming that "too many whites are getting away with drug use" and so on and so bullshit, when in fact Limmy finally became a kite with the body full of hot air and prescription drugs. And did he go high? Oh yeah. Let's not forget that awkward moment at CPAC when, during a speech, Rush seemed to be suffering from uncontrollable bouncing. Seriously, watch the video. The fat bastard becomes a fucking bobble head. I know Keith Olbermann used that already, but I just couldn't resist. Also what are these claims that the American mainstream media is biased liberally. Fox News is one of the most powerful media industries in the country and they're even crazier than you as far as Right Wing states of mind go. It's just like the Right complaining about the Left having Hollywood in their pockets. Seriously? You're saying this after having several actor politicians in your pockets, one of which was a goddamn president. And as a side note, has anyone noticed that when he speaks he tries so sound as epic as possible. Like he were reading the ten commandments, or mimicking General Patton. When I hear him speak, I think of that famous scene from Network with Ned Beatty getting all furious. "YOU HAVE MEDDLED WITH THE PRIMAL FORCES OF NATURE!!!" They even look alike, except Ned Beatty looks presentable.
And you know what I could go on, but it just makes me too angry. Rush Limbaugh is hardly a man. Rush Limbaugh's legend is infamous at best. Rush Limbaugh is not a way of life, it's a way of self destruction that far too many people are following. In closing, Rush Limbaugh can blow me.
This has been a scary camp fire story from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
PS - sorry if it's been awhile.
Friday, October 9, 2009
US Government Presents: No explosions
"Boom!" - Sylar
Hold on a second Sylar, I have to put my far sighted glasses on.
...
Nope, I can't see that huge explosion everyone was pumped for on the news. No boom.
"Boom!"
Hey, now Sylar. Let's not get crazy here. I know you're a psychopath and you're stuck in Parkman's head and all, but...Wait this post isn't about Heroes.
This post is actually about the long awaited LCROSS Lunar Test (hope that's somewhat right) in which a rocket was going to be fired into the Moon. The proposed result was so that we could see if maybe there actually is water on the Moon's surface, thereby giving us hope of one day colonizing the Moon itself. You know, just maybe. But I guess what most little people thought the whole thing was for was to see some kind of massive explosion on the moon. And no, despite what Michael Bay has taught us, big fiery explosions can't happen in space. No oxygen, no fire. Doy. Anywho, if you were expecting some kind of scientific discovery or just plain old "BOOM! HA!" you really are left in the dark as of now. All that really happened was that some dust flew up into the air and that's pretty much it. Of course details may come in later as to what is happening on the surface. But no immediate landmark and no boom.
"Boom!"
I told you to be quiet, damn it.
So I take away two things from this little NASA epic fail: One) things don't just happen and patience is a virtue, and two) people are really dumb to think the only merit to be received from a NASA Lunar mission is the result being a huge Michael Bayish explosion.
...
"BOOM! HA!" I'm sorry I just found that little word effect to be kind of funny.
"Boom!"
SYLAR SHUT THE FUCK UP!
"Boom!"
...Sylar if I tell you where you're body is will you stop doing that?
This has been a report of American activity and anxiety from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Hold on a second Sylar, I have to put my far sighted glasses on.
...
Nope, I can't see that huge explosion everyone was pumped for on the news. No boom.
"Boom!"
Hey, now Sylar. Let's not get crazy here. I know you're a psychopath and you're stuck in Parkman's head and all, but...Wait this post isn't about Heroes.
This post is actually about the long awaited LCROSS Lunar Test (hope that's somewhat right) in which a rocket was going to be fired into the Moon. The proposed result was so that we could see if maybe there actually is water on the Moon's surface, thereby giving us hope of one day colonizing the Moon itself. You know, just maybe. But I guess what most little people thought the whole thing was for was to see some kind of massive explosion on the moon. And no, despite what Michael Bay has taught us, big fiery explosions can't happen in space. No oxygen, no fire. Doy. Anywho, if you were expecting some kind of scientific discovery or just plain old "BOOM! HA!" you really are left in the dark as of now. All that really happened was that some dust flew up into the air and that's pretty much it. Of course details may come in later as to what is happening on the surface. But no immediate landmark and no boom.
"Boom!"
I told you to be quiet, damn it.
So I take away two things from this little NASA epic fail: One) things don't just happen and patience is a virtue, and two) people are really dumb to think the only merit to be received from a NASA Lunar mission is the result being a huge Michael Bayish explosion.
...
"BOOM! HA!" I'm sorry I just found that little word effect to be kind of funny.
"Boom!"
SYLAR SHUT THE FUCK UP!
"Boom!"
...Sylar if I tell you where you're body is will you stop doing that?
This has been a report of American activity and anxiety from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Peace Prizes and HOR Badasses
"The Republican healthcare plan is this: Don't get sick, and if you do get sick, die quickly." - Senator Alan Grayson
For the longest time the Democratic party has been called a bunch of pussies. And for the longest time I have agreed. But now, finally, we get one of them who can stand up and tell it as it is. And with a passion to it. I am of course talking about the politically aggravated HOR member Alan Grayson. Anyone in a House of Representatives seat who has the balls to say America doesn't care about you, is a bamf in my blog. In regards to the healthcare reform, the people who do nothing to help get it passed are pissed that healthcare mysteriously hasn't gotten any better and ones who try to help are just as bewildered.
It's true! Republicans, rather than look for new and universally benificial ways to find better healthcare or better anything, really just chant over and over "NO, NO, NO, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!" God and I thought the Bush Era got old quickly. This guy Grayson states very sincerely that the Republican party will contradict everything that The President does, no matter what it is. And the Republicans have confirmed this many many times before.
Transitioning over into a related topic, Barack Obama has also just won the Nobel Peace Prize. I was just as surprised as him. He himself doesn't feel he is comparable to some of the other more inspiring people who have been given the award. But then, I would have to agree with The Nobel Committee that Obama deserves the award for worldwide sense of hope he conveyed during his campaign and is trying to live up to in his presidency. After almost a decade of blood, betrayal and bullshit, here comes along an Illinois Senator who makes us feel that this country can reclaim some of it's honor and rise up again as a respected country in the eyes of people in the distant. So, though we were at first unsure of how to feel about it, Obama and I, I think, have decided that this is a legitimate reason. And by God am I proud. Not even a year in the White House and Barry O'Bama gets a Nobel Peace Prize. What now Bush-Cheney?
Though I must admit, Obama might have to chip off a piece of that prize for Representative Grayson.
This has been some political awesomeness from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
For the longest time the Democratic party has been called a bunch of pussies. And for the longest time I have agreed. But now, finally, we get one of them who can stand up and tell it as it is. And with a passion to it. I am of course talking about the politically aggravated HOR member Alan Grayson. Anyone in a House of Representatives seat who has the balls to say America doesn't care about you, is a bamf in my blog. In regards to the healthcare reform, the people who do nothing to help get it passed are pissed that healthcare mysteriously hasn't gotten any better and ones who try to help are just as bewildered.
It's true! Republicans, rather than look for new and universally benificial ways to find better healthcare or better anything, really just chant over and over "NO, NO, NO, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!" God and I thought the Bush Era got old quickly. This guy Grayson states very sincerely that the Republican party will contradict everything that The President does, no matter what it is. And the Republicans have confirmed this many many times before.
Transitioning over into a related topic, Barack Obama has also just won the Nobel Peace Prize. I was just as surprised as him. He himself doesn't feel he is comparable to some of the other more inspiring people who have been given the award. But then, I would have to agree with The Nobel Committee that Obama deserves the award for worldwide sense of hope he conveyed during his campaign and is trying to live up to in his presidency. After almost a decade of blood, betrayal and bullshit, here comes along an Illinois Senator who makes us feel that this country can reclaim some of it's honor and rise up again as a respected country in the eyes of people in the distant. So, though we were at first unsure of how to feel about it, Obama and I, I think, have decided that this is a legitimate reason. And by God am I proud. Not even a year in the White House and Barry O'Bama gets a Nobel Peace Prize. What now Bush-Cheney?
Though I must admit, Obama might have to chip off a piece of that prize for Representative Grayson.
This has been some political awesomeness from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Preacher Vol 1 Review
"The way I hear it there's two good places you can look for God: in church or at the bottom of a bottle." - Reverend Jesse Custer
Comics are cool but I am more interested in the gritty and dark hardboiled graphic novels. I could list the popular reads such as Sin City and Watchmen, but recently I've come across the most insane and ghoulishly clever graphic novel Preacher. For believers and nonbelievers alike, don't let the title throw you off. It is not what you're expecting. You hear the title and you figure it may be some kind of hyper religious propaganda or a jolly spiritualistic journey. No way in hell. I don't know if it's cool for me to review this already as I've only read the first of nine volumes, but this one is just too cool for me to ignore.
Just so you're familiar with the story so far, I will elaborate. Preacher tells the tale of Jesse Custer, a faithless minister in a small Texas town who accidentally bonds with a mystical force with questionable holiness. This force is Genesis, the spawn of a the forbidden mating of an Angel and a Demon, whose power may surpass that of God. The bonding of Custer and Genesis in turn kills nearly everyone in town. He soon joins up with two companions: Tulip O'Hare, Jesse's ex girlfriend who may now be a hitwoman and Cassidy, a grungy Irish vampire. Their course is set when they are told by nervous lower class Angels that God has lost faith in his own design and has exiled himself somewhere on Earth and so they set out to find him and make him own up to his responsibilities. And that's the story so far right there. Intrigued or not, you should still check it out.
Preacher is graced with fantastic writing and artwork, both essential components to any comic related work. This is written by Garth Ennis, a British man. According to the forward, his take on American speech, culture, and geography is very much interpretive (reminding me somewhat of Sergio Leone's interpretive take on American Old West in The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly). That's very interesting. The whole thing is interesting.
I honestly don't think that any other graphic novel I've read has been as graphic as this, not even Sin City. This book could give Scorsese and Tarantino a run for their money in the departments of violence and language. Also their just some out of nowhere things in this book that make you cringe and laugh at once. The main instance being Jesse's misuse of his power, The Word of God, on one homicidal cop: "Go fuck yourself". Yeah, I'll let your imagination do the rest. But graphic level aside, the story is really inventive and intriguing. It's probably one of the most intriguing stories I've ever read and this is only the beginning. With arcs and characters that kind of grow on you no matter how unsavory (well maybe). Speaking of characters, Preacher already has a wealth. Of course their is the protagonist, Jesse Custer. It's surprising he'd be a preacher seeing as how his cynicism and bad ass personality give every hint to the contrary. Even his ex lover Tulip can't figure out why he became one. Tulip herself is mysterious and alluring but this time around she wasn't given much dimension besides ridiculing our two boys and blowing the jaw off of some gangster. To be fair she doesn't quite know how to take any of this. Cassidy makes for the vicious comic relief. In a time when girls oggle over pretty boy and creature of the sparkling day Edward Cullen, I am proud to have a vampiric vampire in my realm of fiction. Cassidy is over a hundred years old, wears sleaveless jean jackets and wayfarers, and empties six packs faster than throats. That's what I'm talking about. Other characters arise too, such as the invincible Eastwood-esque grim reaper The Saint of Killers and Arseface, the vengeful son of one of Jesse's unfortunate enemies who destroyed his face while trying to kill himself as a tribute to Kurt Cobain. God this book is great.
I will continue reading and, when I'm done with the whole thing, I will try to give a more summarized review of the series itself. In the meantime, read Preacher Vol 1: Gone To Texas. I just thought it was my kind of kickass, explosive, riotous, spiritually fascinating look and read.
This has been a modest book review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
Comics are cool but I am more interested in the gritty and dark hardboiled graphic novels. I could list the popular reads such as Sin City and Watchmen, but recently I've come across the most insane and ghoulishly clever graphic novel Preacher. For believers and nonbelievers alike, don't let the title throw you off. It is not what you're expecting. You hear the title and you figure it may be some kind of hyper religious propaganda or a jolly spiritualistic journey. No way in hell. I don't know if it's cool for me to review this already as I've only read the first of nine volumes, but this one is just too cool for me to ignore.
Just so you're familiar with the story so far, I will elaborate. Preacher tells the tale of Jesse Custer, a faithless minister in a small Texas town who accidentally bonds with a mystical force with questionable holiness. This force is Genesis, the spawn of a the forbidden mating of an Angel and a Demon, whose power may surpass that of God. The bonding of Custer and Genesis in turn kills nearly everyone in town. He soon joins up with two companions: Tulip O'Hare, Jesse's ex girlfriend who may now be a hitwoman and Cassidy, a grungy Irish vampire. Their course is set when they are told by nervous lower class Angels that God has lost faith in his own design and has exiled himself somewhere on Earth and so they set out to find him and make him own up to his responsibilities. And that's the story so far right there. Intrigued or not, you should still check it out.
Preacher is graced with fantastic writing and artwork, both essential components to any comic related work. This is written by Garth Ennis, a British man. According to the forward, his take on American speech, culture, and geography is very much interpretive (reminding me somewhat of Sergio Leone's interpretive take on American Old West in The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly). That's very interesting. The whole thing is interesting.
I honestly don't think that any other graphic novel I've read has been as graphic as this, not even Sin City. This book could give Scorsese and Tarantino a run for their money in the departments of violence and language. Also their just some out of nowhere things in this book that make you cringe and laugh at once. The main instance being Jesse's misuse of his power, The Word of God, on one homicidal cop: "Go fuck yourself". Yeah, I'll let your imagination do the rest. But graphic level aside, the story is really inventive and intriguing. It's probably one of the most intriguing stories I've ever read and this is only the beginning. With arcs and characters that kind of grow on you no matter how unsavory (well maybe). Speaking of characters, Preacher already has a wealth. Of course their is the protagonist, Jesse Custer. It's surprising he'd be a preacher seeing as how his cynicism and bad ass personality give every hint to the contrary. Even his ex lover Tulip can't figure out why he became one. Tulip herself is mysterious and alluring but this time around she wasn't given much dimension besides ridiculing our two boys and blowing the jaw off of some gangster. To be fair she doesn't quite know how to take any of this. Cassidy makes for the vicious comic relief. In a time when girls oggle over pretty boy and creature of the sparkling day Edward Cullen, I am proud to have a vampiric vampire in my realm of fiction. Cassidy is over a hundred years old, wears sleaveless jean jackets and wayfarers, and empties six packs faster than throats. That's what I'm talking about. Other characters arise too, such as the invincible Eastwood-esque grim reaper The Saint of Killers and Arseface, the vengeful son of one of Jesse's unfortunate enemies who destroyed his face while trying to kill himself as a tribute to Kurt Cobain. God this book is great.
I will continue reading and, when I'm done with the whole thing, I will try to give a more summarized review of the series itself. In the meantime, read Preacher Vol 1: Gone To Texas. I just thought it was my kind of kickass, explosive, riotous, spiritually fascinating look and read.
This has been a modest book review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
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