Mosque Pit

"An angry man opens his mouth and shuts his eyes." - Cato the Elder

In case you weren't informed, an Islamic Mosque is being formed in New York City coincidentally a few blocks away from Ground Zero of the World Trade Center attacks. There has been some backlash due to this construction by a vast number of people, who apparently would like the much revered right to religious freedom to be ignored in this matter. This may actually be the one time I have heard not just someone, but droves of people come out and basically say "it is too soon for religion."

You know, people who frequently blur the lines between religion and state tend to come off as a bit hypocritical to me. Many of the right wing masses (to be fair, those goaded on by the right wing media) are typically pressing the government to get back to the ways of the Constitution. Of course, this means for white, conservative Christians and not for brown, politically ambiguous Muslims. Yes freedom is good until it applies to the people you don't like, then it's obscene. This is only another scapegoat for the conservative media and loose cannon GOP wolves. It is just something else to get their followers afraid and angry about something. Something else that threatens whatever blanket of security the rich and paranoid think they sleep under. It's simple: when the Man says something is good, it's really good; when the Man says something is bad, it's really bad. It doesn't matter if he later says something is bad that he earlier said was good or vice versa. Whatever the rich yet inexplicably relatable guy you believe is looking out for you tells you has got to be true, right?

Quickly: A highpoint of this drama has led up to a protester brutally stabbing a man in the face and verbally abusing him. The man was apparently just someone who "looked Muslim" to him (I guess the guy was bearded with tanned skin). The attacker was some insignificant film student, essentially America's text book bottle of repressed fury. I think the victim was a cab driver, who I think might not have been Muslim but just some passerby. Muslim or Middle Eastern or not, the pudgy lover of the arts has just committed what could be called a hate crime, proving this protest is one big gathering of rage to a particular group of people a la discrimination. How does one look like a religion, I've never gotten that. Too many stupid people confuse religions with race. Let me clear this up: people don't look Muslim, they look Middle Eastern; people don't look Jewish, they look Israeli; people don't look Christian, they look like Toby Keith. Let's go a step further and not categorize a certain people as having to remain of a certain faith. A white man is just as free to be Muslim as an Iraqi man, just like the Iraqi man can be just as Christian as he wants to be in America.

Obviously, I understand the mindset of the people against the mosque. The terrorists involved in the attacks were mostly, if not all Muslim. Still, the terrorists were under the command and fighting in the name of a radical organization that used religion, as many radical organizations do, to justify murder and warfare. So in a sense, the Islamic religion was a victim to the crimes of Osama Bin Laden as well. Do the actions of the few spoil the many? That's a question heard frequently in the past. The people protesting the mosque apparently think so. I might understand their side of things a bit more if The Taliban was setting up shop near Ground Zero, seeing as how they were the ones responsible for the attacks that made it. Just because the people involved were Muslim doesn't mean shit. Do people just forget all the horrifying things have come about from the actions of other religions in the past? Anyone remember the pointless bloodshed of The Crusades? Hitler was a Christian, but we aren't afraid that all Christians wanna slaughter Jews and rule the world these days, are we?... well come to think of it... nope, no I'm not getting into that.

Another thing is, the people of New York or wherever angry assholes come from are acting like this thing just hunkered down right next to the site. As if the trash from the mosque being tossed out around back is landing right down into the thick of the disaster point. It's over two blocks away! It's not like the stench of Islam is going to rise up from the air and glide over and infect the holiness that is Ground Zero. Also, I thought New York City was supposed to be one of the most ethnically and culturally diverse cities in the world. Major hypocrisy! There is just as much of a chance of a Taliban cell residing within this mosque as there is of a Christian church housing the next Jim Jones; both are just as probable as they are improbable. 9/11 is often compared to the Pearl Harbor Attacks of 1941. After the attacks many Japanese-Americans, Japanese tourists, and some just Asians in general were hualed off to internment camps for fear of being enemy operatives. Of course we didn't keep them in those camps forever and they certainly aren't looked upon with hateful eyes anymore. We as Americans should know just like anyone else that the little people do not have any say in the actions of the powerful. Many Muslims were no doubt horrified about 9/11 too, and even more terrified of retaliations once Muslim men were revealed to be the terrorists. They are just people.

The protest of the mosque goes against one of the most crucial elements of our constitution. Freedom of religion is very essential to this country. Though I am not a particularly religious man and pretty non-denominationally hinged, I think it is great that people in this country are allowed to practice a faith of their choosing. Faith is an important thing, it is not something that should be toyed with. So in my opinion, New Yorkers should be able to go into a little mosque and bow to Allah in peace if that is their choice. Anyone's got a problem with that, then they should take it up with their God, otherwise leave them alone.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to say that people should get over 9/11. How can someone get over a thing like that? I'm saying that we should move on. It happened, there is no changing it. But we can change and with the way things are we certainly need to change. But to change some need faith. In this country that luxury should be free for everyone.

This has been some commentary on recent controversy from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Viewing Obama/There's something about Snooki

"To be angry is easy. But to be angry with the right man at the right time in the right manner, that is not easy." - Aristotle

I agree with the notion that it doesn't matter what President Obama does, he will remain criticized to no end. I'm sure Barry O'Bama (his name Irished) could rush into a burning orphanage, save everyone inside, put out the fire himself, kiss the head of a baby, end world hunger, bring an end to international turmoil, find and singlehandedly capture Osama Bin Laden, and solve the mysteries of the Kennedy assassination, Jimmy Hoffa's disappearance, the identities of Jack The Ripper, D.B. Cooper, and the Zodiac Killer, as well as all of the alien sightings and there would still be those people out there who can swing all of those things in a way that make him seem like the most inept president ever, despite the fact that he is more sincere, infinitely more intelligent, more likable, runs a tighter operation, and is overall head and shoulders above the last one. Does it matter to the neo conservative masses? Fuck no.

Consider Obama's recent choice to be a guest on The View, that show I never watch with the people I've lost interest in. You better believe Fox News had something to say about this. Mainly making points like Obama should have done something different like make an appearance for the new Boy Scouts of America, or remarking The View and the women who host the show as if it was just a bunch of yappy harpies bitching about nothing. First of all, I agree maybe showing up for the Boy Scouts of America could have been a nice chance for Obama to give one of his eloquent and inspiring speeches (though I'm sure if he did, Fox would probably right it off as showboating), but it's not like these kids are gonna grow up to be rapists and crackheads because he didn't do it, and the fact that Obama didn't doesn't mean he is totally inconsiderate of America's youth (remember that very inspiring message to the students of America that everyone freaked out about and called socialist propaganda despite the fact that nothing in the message indicated socialism?). Yes clearly the choice between visiting The View or The Boy Scouts of America was horrendously executed, no way can it hold a candle to the outstanding strategic decision-making of George W. Bush when he was faced with a choice between immediately dealing with The World Trade Center Attacks or reading a story to bored schoolchildren. Clearly. And the second point, about the View and View Hosts, if any show features nothing but a bunch of yappy harpies bitching about nothing it's Fox fucking News. Yeah so what did the clearly dim and ditzy women of The View talk about with Obama? The Healthcare Reform, the Stimulus Package, the wars in the Middle East, you know the little things. I'll admit, from what I've seen, the people of The View do talk about a lot of very gossipy, uninteresting stuff, but they aren't dumb by any means. And the choice to appear on The View, yeah maybe it doesn't seem like the most solid idea for a President, but being the President is still one of the highest forms of celebrity in this country and every celebrity needs to promote himself to the people and sometimes a big political rally with a bunch of folks from your own demographic isn't the way to go. Sometimes you need to get on a talk-show with a specific person or persons that a specific demographic reveres. Barry and VP Joe Biden have sat down with Jay Leno a number of times. This View nonsense is just more cannon fodder for Fox News, more incentive for them to continue complaining.

Do you ever get the sense that the length of which the conservative media and populace attacks Obama is a just a little cartoonish. Like, have you ever thought to yourself some of these people actually don't have a problem with or even like Obama. Who knows, maybe the Right Wing sends everyone a check every time they talk shit about the conservative parties' opponents. Probably not, but it still seems off to me. Like I've said before, I actually try not to keep up to date with politics, so I may be a bit wrong about some of the stuff I'm saying. At least I can admit, unlike some people.

Anyway, who the fuck cares about Jersey Shore? I mean honestly, how many people can seriously be interested or entertained by the activities of a bunch trashy, douchebag New York 20-somethings shipped off to New Jersey and passed off as New Jersey residents, their activities being getting wasted, getting laid, being bitches, fist shaking or something, overkilling their hair gel and spray, constantly affirming themselves and begging for self-affirmation from others, and overall putting shame to our founding fathers. I can find it entertaining as if it was a parody. A very, very, very over the top parody. It seems designed for those who thought Jackass needed to be dumbed down for them. I can't expect anybody who has a shred of self-respect, an ounce of common sense, a gram of taste would watch Jersey Shore. So how can anyone honestly expect the President of The United States of America to watch Jersey Shore? One of the minor, less intelligent questions the ladies of The View asked Obama was what were his thoughts on Jersey Shore alum "Snooki" possibly running for Mayor of Wasilla, Alaska and Obama had no idea who they were talking about. Yes, while Obama was recently holding rallies in the factories of Michigan, even coming up with the new little slogan "I'll bet on the American worker any day of the week", I'm sure he'd cut in time to tune in to the current misadventures of Mike "The Situation" and Jenni "JWOWW." Seriously, we are gonna pass judgement on our President because he doesn't keep up to date with America's latest television fads? A few years ago Obama apparently claimed his favorite TV show was The Wire, which was hailed by many critics as the greatest show on television and beloved by even more. But why watch the intricate sociopolitical exploits of Baltimore's finest against the drug and gang violence that plagues the streets when you could bare witness to what I pray is un-reality TV's selfish, obnoxious, but nevertheless proud Guido heroes, who are lucky enough to get girl on girl action and a possible three way in the first fucking episode.

Honestly I only heard of Jersey Shore from The Soup and how it makes fun of it, and I've seen it playing on TV. And for those brief moments my mind was absent and I allowed myself to linger on it, it was still repulsive. I honestly tried to give a show I knew was shit a chance and I couldn't even pass thirty seconds, it's that bad. Maybe by some miracle I just hit a rough patch when I incidentally tuned in for those short few times. Maybe Jersey Shore is a powerful reality television show that looks into the souls of these select dysfunctional and confused young men and women. Maybe it was the one people wrote off because they were angry with the recent slews of reality shows that have endless spinoffs or sequels. Or maybe my instincts are right, maybe everything everybody I admire and even some I don't has said about it is correct, and maybe it is just total shit TV. The ratings would certainly agree, they were so poor that audiences will thankfully not have to endure more of Jersey Shore. The fact that Fox criticized Obama because he was NOT aware of it should tell you readers something about Fox. And regarding rumours of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi running for a mayoral position in a small Alaskan town, I will say that, considering Alaska's past electoral outcomes (one in particular), I'd say she definitely has a shot, even if her recent and inevitable arrest does hamper that ambition.

I was almost a little intimidated by the fact that I was going to be mixing another one of my many Obama defendings with my bashing of Jersey Shore. I think, all things considering, I did a fairly good job. The notion of such a feat sounds really surreal and ludicrous. But hey, I'm always willing to try new things when it comes to writing. It's been awhile since I've had myself a good long rant. This was kind of refreshing.

This has been a comment on the recent bullshit from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Fuck the Pohlice

"...If you want to test a man's character, give him power." - Abraham Lincoln

The stereotype that police officers around the world regularly abuse power has not deteriorated over the years. You give a man weapons and a badge and turn him loose on the world, you have to expect that just maybe the man will have a higher opinion of himself. America has become somewhat infamous for it's high level of police brutality within the last few decades. Some may recall the The Watts Riots of '65 and The Los Angeles Riots of '62. Many believe the riots in Watts were brought on by a boiling point of people of different race enduring police brutality. The latter definitely, as it was ignited by the beating of Rodney King, an African American man beaten by multiple police officers.

My generation is not without its share of this kind of injustice. Many remember the college kid who was brutally, unnecessarily, and illegally tasered by police officers, who were clearly conservative, for asking former Presidential candidate legitimate but nonetheless liberal questions at a conference. "DON'T TASE ME, BRO!" Yeah that thing. It didn't stop there either, we've got all sorts of situations these days involving innocent and clearly non-violent people getting physically assualted by cops. The tasing penalty is reserved for anyone, from insolent five year-olds to misunderstood fifty-seven year-old school teachers. So yeah, apparently if you don't listen to a cop there's no rules and regulations, it's just taser time. God bless America.

Of course I'm not saying all cops are powertripping loose cannons, but there is this never-ending element of control and power that some people with the badge seem to desire. You know who else have those kinds of elements: rapists. Come on officers, the motto is "to serve and protect" so hop fucking to it. To all the good guys out there, keep the streets safe, even from your police bretheren. Help take a bite out of crime... and corruption.

This has been a slightly more modest Modest PSA from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Arizona Schmarizona

"When you talk it's like little people throwing up in my head!" - Couple's Therapist from College Humor

...Wow that quote made no sense. But then that is how I feel about the people responsible for this subject.

So yeah, there is a law now in Arizona that says if you look like an illegal immigrant you can be taken aside by the police, you will be asked for documents and papers that say you are an American right than and there, and if you don't have them you will be arrested. Yet this isn't racial profiling, according to bill signer and supporter Governor Jan Brewer?

Almost no one has had a positive reaction to this. Why? Because it doesn't make any sense! This bill has as many holes as the Star Wars prequels and is about as useful. Yeah I don't know how any sane and supposedly un-prejudiced person could like this bill. It is essentially giving people a right to descriminate. Do you have any idea how many racists are going to take advantage of this?

911 OPERATOR: 911 Emergency...
REDNECK: Uh, yes'm, I saw me some beaners in line at the Target. Looked to be a whole pack of em, brown skin, funny little noses and all. They's probably fence jumpers, you know. Tell ya what ya oughta do ya oughta get some riot gear down here with some of that bat-ons! Oomkay, some bat-ons and teesers or tasers or whatever ya call em, get those down here and send them back to whatever little desert hut they came from.

Now in a world we should be living in, this is what we would hear next:

911 OPERATOR: (Click, dial tone)......
REDNECK: Hehlo? I say, hehlo? Do you read, this is Cletus Fairfax.........Hehlo?

But no, in the real world this is what we will hear down in Arizona:

911 OPERATOR: Thank you, sir. Remain calm, we will have a squad car down there right away.
REDNECK: Yes, uh, thank ya, thank ya, ma'am. Just doin' my services to this fine continent of these United States of Amurica.

Who actually carries around with them any and every written form that says they are an American citizen. I don't, better stay out of Arizona. Imagine how the police must feel about this too. Imagine how awkward and shameful that would be to walk up to people who don't look American and pester them about their papers. Nobody likes this. The President doesn't like it. The people don't like it. Some upstanding Mexican-Americans from Arizona certainly don't like it. The ironic thing is, these Mexican folks they are so desperately trying to weed out of this country were here a long time before we were.

I especially loved it when Governor Brewer was taking questions around the time of her signing the bill. While she stuck to her guns and defended it, people asked some pretty logical questions: "What does an illegal immigrant look like?" To which she had no answer. Even though this is all clear racial profiling, she denies it. It's like saying this horse isn't white, it's blank. It makes no sense. But I suppose it doesn't have to. At the end of the day, the issue is not legality. The issue is we want brown people out of this country. Politicians can use whatever bills or laws they like, but they are no different from the assholes in my school who say "build a wall around Mexico!" They are racists who don't like the label "racist." There is another example of hypocrisy, or maybe just plain denial. I don't know, this whole thing is stupid. Politics are stupid, Jan Bitcher is stupid, this post is stupid. No matter what we do, someone will be feeding the fire on one side or the other. But still, I suppose it matters which side you choose. There are times though, when I wish I could be the wind that blows it away.

This has been a shout out to the bullshit from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

F-Biden

"This is a big fucking deal!" - Vice President Joe Biden

Okay my friends, I am writing this late at 12 in the morning so forgive me if this post seems a little uh...blah!!! This will be Your Modest Guru's response to Vice President Joe Biden's too audible comment to our President about the new Healthcare Reform being passed. But before we get to that, you will just have to endure the slap happy humourous exposition to come before the real point...or you can just skip to the point if you are feeling like a lazy bastard (sorry, the further I am into the day the more douchebaggish I get.) Let's go forth.

During the 2008 presidential campaign I couldn't take my eyes off of Barack Obama. Literally. My mom had the television on nonstop blaring anything that had his hope inspiring, pride restoring face on it. And not much, regarding my mom's TV viewing, has changed since his election. Obviously I am not as dedicated to political updates as my parents, and I know I should be, but still I just find the whole thing really depressing. But my topic tonight (or this morning) is not about how utterly depressing politics is or how utterly awesome our fair President is. No we are here to talk about the less popular White House newcomer of our last election. Joseph Biden. Now when Joe Biden first caught my eye I wasn't let down. True, he wasn't anywhere near as godly as Obama was made out to be, but he still had a certain charisma. He seemed like a straight shooting, good intentioned, happy guy. Also, the fact he was going up against America's most popular soccer mom (not a compliment) helped him out a helluva lot. Let me just sum up their debates for you.

Biden: Why am I qualified? I have practiced law and worked as a successful lawyer for years. In 1972 I was the first elected to Senate. I've been chairman in the Senate Judiciary Committee and Foreign Relations Committee. I have advocated US Military aid in the Bosnian War. I have helped create the Violent Crime Control and Law Enforcement Act and Violence Against Women Act. I have been involved in politics for over thirty years. That is why I am qualified to be your next vice president.

Palin: (reads hand note)... I can see Russia from my house!

Yeeeah, I'm going with Biden! But after getting into office with Barry O'Bama, Biden showed that while he wasn't nearly as idiotic as Palin, he had his not so bright moments. Sometimes he would incidentally talk about information that may or may not be sensitive to the infrastructure of our nation. What I most remember is him telling reporters on TV almost exactly where he and his family would hide if there was a terrorist attack...Joe what were ya thinking? "Yes, if there are any terrorists out there I just want you to know my family and I will be hiding out in our secret bunker just outside of Washington D.C., Virginia! We will be guarded by two trainee guards with a short supply of ammunition! The door to the bunker will be unlocked! So yeah, you have no chance of finding us!" = reenactment. Not as smart as I thought you were. I mean, really, I hate Dick Cheney like I hate AIDS, but Cheney was smart enough to keep secrets...mostly because his secrets were no doubt diabolical and horrifying but come on.

But we come to our point at last. As you all know, Healthcare Reform was just passed in America and this is a sure victory for the guys in the White House and hopefully a victory for America. After Joe Biden got done presenting Barack Obama to the podium, he shook his hand and joyfully said in his ear "this is a big fucking deal." Amazing how we heard this probably three feet away from the microphone and over the sound of a cheering crowd. That is strange, could this be some kind of new smear campaign. Well for now, all we are left to know is that Biden did in fact say this and people are in an outrage. Why? Mainly because they don't want to talk about the real issues and are using this as just another distraction or because they just like to bitch. I don't see the big deal. Biden said this because he was happy over the success of his team. I remember when Cheney was reported to have dropped the so called "F Bomb", but when he said it was in a violent or insulting way. This Biden thing really isn't that big a deal. I know writing this is just making it an even bigger deal in some small way, but it is not, as Biden himself would put it, "a big fucking deal." I mean, I remember when Barack Obama himself was caught cursing: he called Kanye West "a jackass" after the Taylor Swift thing, everyone thought it was funny as hell. I thought it was badass, if anything Barack Obama and Joe Biden cursing in the context they do so in earns them a lot more respect from me. And they both did it when they themselves felt certain that the public's overly sensitive ears wouldn't hear them. Oh and I know we are supposed to expect these two, our countries captain and first mate, to be totally noble and full of grace, but, lest we forget, these are grown men. They can curse like sailors and in this century it wouldn't be any big deal. Half of the goddamn kids in this country have a poorer handle on language than these two. Look at me, I'm a kid and cursing like I'm in a fucking Quentin Tarantino movie. It doesn't matter! Ya know what does matter? Haiti, the wars that seem to be boiling over to a new country every day, hunger, poverty, violence, the weather. For those of you so interested in this or even offended by this, look around you!

On a final note about Joe Biden, I'd just like to say that I still think he is a good vice president so far despite his flaws and absent mindedness from time to time. For anyone who thinks he is a bad Vice President I will hear your arguement if you have it, but I would also like to redirect your attention to Biden's former competition (She who shall not be elected) and his predecessor (Cheney). Maybe Biden doesn't have the balls that Cheney has, but need we be reminded that Dick Cheney is a homicidal maniac. Seriously just look at him, hell, just listen to him. Every time he opens his mouth I get the feeling that he's holding back insane laughter. He's like a strange hybrid of G. Gordon Liddy, Dr. Doom, and Emperor Palpatine. The man is just evil, all I heard out of him throughout the Bush-Cheney Campaign was in a nutshell preaching to the macho men and NRA members of America: "DESTROY THEM ALL!!! KILL KILL KILL!!!" Seriously, pyscho. Biden my hat is off to you and thank you you swell bastard for replacing this monster because to me it is a big fucking deal.

This has been a big fu-- I mean an uncensored rant from Your Modest Guru and many more to come. Thanks for reading.

Reform passed/score one for the left

"Our body is a machine for living. It is organized for that, it is its nature. Let life go on in it unhindered and let it defend for itself, it will do more for if you paralyze by encumbering it with remedies." - Leo Tolstoy

I really gotta stop using quotes that even I can't fathom.

Okay after much deliberation in the last few months and a long drawn out battle between the right wing and the left wing, the healthcare reform is passed. Now President Obama has been talking about healthcare reform since like the second he got into office. How we should have universal healthcare every person living in the United States can afford and have access to before dying in the lobby of some emergency room. I like this idea, healthcare for years has been a system in which doctors milk you dry or deny health insurance however they can. You know how you can't get insurance if you had a pre-existing condition, I remember a story at one point in which a girl stricken with cancer was denied insurance because of her pre-existing condition: acne. Yeah when a hospital makes you a poor victim of cancer because of acne, you know healthcare's fucked up. And how about a personal story from the Guru himself? Alright, so a couple of years ago I had a terrible tooth infection that kept me out of school for more than two weeks and my face swelled up and hurt like hell. Finally I was taken to the dentist, they managed to pull out the infectious tooth but told my mom to take me to the ER to get a second opinion and maybe be taken care of better than the dentist could. I hadn't been to any hospital in years, and my mom a lot longer. When we got there, we waited in the lobby for about two hours until they finally saw to us. And then I spent another two hours lying on a bed watching TV while the doctor/nurse was "going to be back". In the end all I got out of these four hours was three things: I got to watch The Simpsons and Seinfeld, I got doped up real good with an IV, and the doctor told us we should see a dentist. Now isn't that helpful. And you know what my parents got out of that four hours of nothing? Nearly bankrupt. God bless America.

Now the right as always is bitching a storm like the control freak it is. All I've heard from them is a neverending chant of healthcare is evil, healthcare is faschist, healthcare is socialist. Yeah mainly that's all they've said: the healthcare reform is socialist and the republican masses have followed suit. Funny that they did so, considering most of them probably couldn't even tell you what socialism is. According to internet sources, socialism is a system where the government can have control of virtually all aspects of a society. It also states that everyone within the society gets their share (not bad, the wealthy have had theirs for so long, it's time the rest of us get some too). We've hit another level of hypocrisy when a group of people whose main trait is having control of our society uses that same thing as the pinata. Everyone says this supposedly socialist reform is the first step toward a socialist form of government. Seriously. I don't know what fantasy world these guys have lived in for the past decade, but I lived in the Bush-Cheney America. Does anyone remember fear of the Patriot Act, that was complete with spy planes and talk of tapping phones all over the country. The government already has control, they can do whatever they want. I was a paranoid bastard back then, and now when all of that is over and I get a small sigh of relief, everyone gets paranoid of a guy who means well and is trying to do good for the entire nation. I'm sure other people out there (high and mighty bigots no doubt) will be enraged by the everyone gets a share policy of this reform. I'd advise them to grow up and get with the times. This isn't the 17th century, its not only WASPs who are getting healthcare anymore. Everyone in this country has a right to good health, be it the law abiding the upper class, the bong smoking middle class, or the shanty town lower class.

Once again, I can't stress that I am only sixteen, with a very limited knowledge of the big picture of politics, but I am smart enough to know that we live in a time of change. I suppose I am liberally bias toward this whole situation. Hilary Clinton made promises and failed to get us better healthcare back in the 1990s when I was just emerging into this world. I was born with cleft lip and was given enough surgeries to look normal. Let it be said, I am no Phantom of the Opera, just have a scar. But now as I'm getting older, my face is stretching out and the surgery will eventually come undone. I talked about how getting nothing from the hospital nearly bankrupted my family, imagine what surgery at Reilly Hospital would cost.

Okay too personal, back on topic. To end off, I say I am happy about this reform. I hope it gives more than it takes from the people of America in years to come. There were a lot of moments I was sure this would not pass, like when Ted Kennedy's senate spot was lost to a once nude posing Republican. For anyone who says Obama has not done anything since his election here you go.

This has been a not so modest return to politics from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Obama goan git em

Oh the sadness of Barack Obama's presidency. Oh the horror of the one preceding his own. And the countless bullet holes left in this country's honor left for him to mend. Of course he will not fix everything in a flash, even he has stressed this. There is simply too much shit to clean up. I won't go into too much detail on said shit as I have done that in the last previous posts regarding Barry O'Bama.

But still I must reiterate from previous rants that Obama is expected of quickly doing things far beyond his power and maliciously beaten down by the pathetic half of America. You know, the ones who call him Hitler. The ones who won't shut up during meetings that even seem to be heading toward a liberal viewpoint. The ones who still bitch about his birth certificate. Do you think any of these people would have denied Hawaii as part of these United States before Obama came along?

The point is with this yang country halve and his failure to make everything better with the snap of his fingers, Barry's points are down and dropping. That's bad. So recently, I'm sure in order to appease these fools with far too great expectations, Barack has been announcing his support to continue the war with Afghanistan. Earlier tonight, I watched as he gave another of his masterful speeches to a mass of America's soldiers. It was much better than George W's "Yeah, we goan git em" approach to such a speech. While I am not enthusiastic about this (just don't dig war that much), Obama thankfully did not make this declaration of war or continued war sound like the beginning of the end of everything he stands for and the restoration of our nation but rather the means to an end. An end to the Bush-Cheney Presidency's corrupt conflict. Someone on the Huffington Post commented that Obama seemed to have been choking up while in front of those young men and women in uniform. I might have seen it myself. In his eyes was not quite defeat, but sorrow. He is not far enough into the game to prepare for defeat already. No, this looks more like a smaller form. Something called selling out. Obama is forced to sell out his principles and one of his promises made during his campaign in order to boost his approval ratings and, with the utmost hope, end one of the dirty wars left for him to clean up. Really I think that's all he wants, to finish the war as quickly and cleanly as possible. He'd pursued similar action when ordering the killings of those dangerous pirates and kidnappers. Fast and efficient methods all to get the job done. I don't believe Obama is a man who seeks to continue violence.

I have not lost hope for a bright future for Barack Obama's presidency and, thus, I have not lost hope for a brighter future for America. I think in time he will make a glorious name for himself in history outside of the racial significance. He has the integrity and prowess to become one of the most prominent Presidents this country has ever seen. I hope the people's resentment toward him will only strengthen his resolve and turn him into a better leader at the end of his term and possible second.

This latest development with Afghanistan is not the first step in blotting out Barack Obama's ethics and principles, but hopefully it is the first step in building onto them and the last time he will ever be forced to betray them. He is a good man. It's hard to be a good man in a world as cutthroat as politics.

This has been another report on our current President from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Obama: respectful and PROUD OF IT

"Never gonna stop, yeah, never gonna stop." - Rob Zombie

The most recent bashing of Obama's integrity comes in the form of, of all things, a sign of respect to foreign neighbors. In greeting the Japanese Emperor and his wife, Barack Obama gave the cultural bow as I thought would have been expected. But no. The media has something else to critique Barack Obama about. He is being insulted for respecting a person's culture, not just a person but the Emperor of Japan. That is someone you pull out all stops for just like he would do for the American President himself I'm sure if on our soil.

It's just another distraction, just something else to bitch about. I think the bad ass US Representative Alan Grayson made it perfectly and honestly clear that whatever Obama does is going to be received negatively, be it "ending world hunger" or "building world peace". I guess it's the way hardcore Christianists believe will happen to nonbelievers: you could save the world ten times over and still go to hell. When it comes to Obama these days it's you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. That is an unacceptable way to treat the President of the United States. Sure I hated the hell out of George Bush but I did not beat the piss out of everything he did, I mean there was a small eight percent of things he might've done right.

People are stupid. I know that is a pretty plain and kind of juvenile way of putting it but it's true. Most people these days can't find actual things to get angry about. It's all bullshit things that even the least clever person in the world wouldn't use as comeback lines. Now that shit's pathetic.

Please god, don't let people get any dumber as the years go by.

This has been another case of American idiocy, and more to come from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Evil little babies...Wait what?

"My name is Michael J. Caboose and I hate BABIES!!!" - Michael J. Caboose

Has the Republican Party just become a total circus this year. A Democrat is in office for less than a year and the whole massive conservative forces have already converted to some scorched earth insanity that not even Adolf Hitler could comprehend. If anyone thinks a Hitler statement in relation to the Republican Party is too much, I will clear myself by advising you to look at their drone army rallies with posters of Obama as Hitler. But I digress.

The latest case of a conservative dick move comes from Arizona House Representative John Shedegg. Instead of just acting like a self righteous bullshitter like every other Republican, he throws something unexpected on to the table: a baby. Yes, he has his infant granddaughter in The House of Representatives as a ploy to get his point across of the new healthcare plan as being evil, or socialist, or faschist, or whatever. He goes on using the oblivious little girl as a tool, saying "she" doesn't want her parents to have the Government in charge of their healthcare. "She" doesn't want their hands in her miniature pockets. "She" doesn't want them to take her bottle. So on and so bullshit.

Well Rep. Shedegg, in the future SHE probably will be infuriated that she was used as a prop for the a political party supporting something that screws over thousands of Americans every day. SHE would be more passionate about an episode of Dora the Explorer or Barney rather than a dull as hell political meeting. SHE can't even speak right now, so I think SHE doesn't support much of any cause right now. And I think SHE, a child, shouldn't be used as a card you play to pull the wings off of a fly.

I know all of you people out there, ultra conservative or not, will be literally in AWE of this baby. That is the desired effect: you know what the guy is there to say, what his opinion is and so on, then throw in a baby, something cute and cuddly to tug at your heart strings meanwhile Mr. White Cuffs talks about how this new healthcare plan will rape her and her children in the future. After that your sold and they win.

Look at the baby. The whole time, the baby isn't deeply enthralled or moved by her grampika's speech. She's fumbling around with the microphone. Other than the fact that babies are naturally clingy, my best guess as to why she is trying to Kanye West that microphone is because she is desperately trying to sabotage the speech. Babies cry when they see Ronald McDonald; this kid is in a room full of old, gray white guys whose skin sag like a full grocery bag (yay rhymes), not to mention one of them talking loudly into a microphone right by her ears. Not even a whimper out of the kid. Either they are holding her blankey hostage or the Republican Party threatened to have the conservative media brand her "Leftist Baby".

This whole negatively received fiasco has only strengthened my theory that the Republican Party has no shame when it comes to the schoolyard bully tactics that they call politics. Perhaps one day when the adrenaline dies down, these assholes will realize that some things simply must be done. I end off by giving my sympathies to the poor infant child subjected to an idea against something that could be the first step to helping people in the future.

This has been a entry of madness from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Peace Prizes and HOR Badasses

"The Republican healthcare plan is this: Don't get sick, and if you do get sick, die quickly." - Senator Alan Grayson

For the longest time the Democratic party has been called a bunch of pussies. And for the longest time I have agreed. But now, finally, we get one of them who can stand up and tell it as it is. And with a passion to it. I am of course talking about the politically aggravated HOR member Alan Grayson. Anyone in a House of Representatives seat who has the balls to say America doesn't care about you, is a bamf in my blog. In regards to the healthcare reform, the people who do nothing to help get it passed are pissed that healthcare mysteriously hasn't gotten any better and ones who try to help are just as bewildered.

It's true! Republicans, rather than look for new and universally benificial ways to find better healthcare or better anything, really just chant over and over "NO, NO, NO, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!" God and I thought the Bush Era got old quickly. This guy Grayson states very sincerely that the Republican party will contradict everything that The President does, no matter what it is. And the Republicans have confirmed this many many times before.

Transitioning over into a related topic, Barack Obama has also just won the Nobel Peace Prize. I was just as surprised as him. He himself doesn't feel he is comparable to some of the other more inspiring people who have been given the award. But then, I would have to agree with The Nobel Committee that Obama deserves the award for worldwide sense of hope he conveyed during his campaign and is trying to live up to in his presidency. After almost a decade of blood, betrayal and bullshit, here comes along an Illinois Senator who makes us feel that this country can reclaim some of it's honor and rise up again as a respected country in the eyes of people in the distant. So, though we were at first unsure of how to feel about it, Obama and I, I think, have decided that this is a legitimate reason. And by God am I proud. Not even a year in the White House and Barry O'Bama gets a Nobel Peace Prize. What now Bush-Cheney?

Though I must admit, Obama might have to chip off a piece of that prize for Representative Grayson.

This has been some political awesomeness from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

America: a tragedy/No president is an island

"Transparency and the rule of law will be the touchstones of this presidency." - Barack Obama

Please be patient. My point will rise eventually. Everything that comes before it is just a build up.

George W. Bush was known for being the kind of guy you as an average citizen might know and hang out with and, I think, Barack Obama is that kind of guy too. The only two differences, 1) Barack knows what the fuck he is doing and 2) everyone thinks he is doing worse than Bush. Barack is not given enough credit. I mean seriously what is wrong with people. Here is a man whose origin is and has been cited as the very definition of the American success story. Here is a man who was the offspring of an Kenyan man and an American woman in Hawaii. Here is a man who built a beautiful family that worked together and were strong together. Here is a man who became a successful attorney and made his way to the US senate. Here is a man who began a presidential campaign being the son of a muslim, being mixed race, and still maintaining complete control over his situation. Here is man who in this campaign graced the vast crowds that gathered in the corners of our nation to listen to his moving and hope inspiring speeches (speeches that were said to resemble those of Martin Luther King or Jack Kennedy). Here is a man who won the election because he was golden and he was true blue. Here is a man who did what people 50 years ago would have called a fantasy. And now a few months later, here is a man who, due to the ignorance of the little guys he sought to lead and protect, has been outcast.

Let's have a brief trip down memory lane. Shall we start at the 2000 election, when the votes were clearly in the favor of Democratic nominee Al Gore to be the election winner and then suddenly there was a MIRACULOUS mistake that led to George Bush being the winner. Conveinent. Everyone was convinced he stole the election but justice was never enforced. And in doing so, we were dazzled by too many years of retard moments, bad decisions, confused grammer and yet another bad/manipulated election. God bless America.

Let's cut one year later. It's a beautiful September morning, then suddenly our country shakes and the world changes as two hijacked planes give the tallest American buildings a kiss. George Bush heard about this tragedy while reading to preschoolers and in a brave move he...Continued to read the children while the streets were still flaming. Okay then, I guess the situation wasn't as pressing. Maybe it would take a nuked city before he decides that the poor kids will just have to go through life not knowing what happens to the little story book hero. Even though our own President took his sweet time to sort his shit, our people wanted primitive, blood drenched retribution faster than you can say Kill Bill. I was horrified after finding out it wasn't an accident, but I was too young to be demanding blood and murder. I think though if I could be there as mature as I am now, I would want every single one who was responsible dead.

When our president finally did decide to act what did he do? Did he get a crack team of the government's most advanced investigators together and find out where they were hiding, what countries were involved, who specifically should be punished? Did he rally all of America's finest warriors and lay down justice on them? Oh no, he threw us way off with an even more gung ho plan! He invaded a country that was not involved whatsoever and milked a war for eight years so that they could extract oil from their ground while the man responsible for the murders we thought we were avenging gets away to an unknown location and has done so to this very fucking day! God bless America.

The whole 9/11 scenario obviously had some pyschological impact on many god fearing Americans who up until that point were convinced wthat we were impenetrable and invincible. When this turned out to be wrong, they were scared, looking for the first person who lies and assures them that they are not in the slightest bit of trouble and we're gonna come back and show those bastards what our country music and Budweiser and Chuck Norris and red blooded culture is all about. That was Darth Bush, I mean, President Bush and Emperor Cheney, I mean, Vice President Cheney and people are still convinced that that idea was the last logical thing. They forced us into war with a less fortunate country and killed hundreds of women, children, and whole families with a cause that was anything but probable. They excused their way into a fight and what we did is the equivalent of a frat kid setting a homeless guy on fire in some alley. Honestly, the world trade center bombings, though tragic, has paled in comparison to the number of buildings we've blown to dust since 2001. There are still people who believe that Iraq, an aquaintance and partner we cheerfully stabbed in the back, is the guilty one. 9/11 also opened up a woodwork that unleashed a whirlwind of right wing fanatics who did nothing but accuse, ridicule and contradict and a flurry of left wing pussies who did nothing but complain, fall over, and let themselves get fucked. We've got Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly and Glen Beck and all the other sociapaths doing nothing but rocking the boat and crowning themselves gods, all the while trying to escape the fact that they were once the people no one wanted to talk to as children. With all this, our country has been made misguided and progressively more stupid.

I remember those eight years and how miserable I was. My mom morosely complaining about the Bush doctrine and all the pain and lies that have come with it and her lack of hope for the future left me very depressed when all I wanted was to live life carefree. Those were the days when I tried to deny politics, but it wasn't long before I was at least a little bit savvy in my arguments and I was more prone to get into them. In contrast to a lot of other peoples' opinions, it's good to know what you're talking about these days.

We were begging for hope, begging for restoration of some honor in this country. A fail safe to rescue us from a nose dive into infamy. In 2004, our only hope was John Kerry. He is smart charismatic, and a war hero (which some people had the audacity to deny) all things Bush was not. Bush still won though, due to his strangle hold over the sheeple and some trusty road blocks.
My mom was in tears. Four more years of this shit. I bottled up my anger and looked to the bright side. I told my mom myself, "At least he won't be there forever. It's just four more years." This helped her sleep a little better, but, mark my words people, nothing is ever "Just" anything, especially not four years.

Hope again arose with the latest election, okay these are not elections anymore they are only whose dick is bigger contests. Our four main spectacles were without a doubt John McCain, Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin. These are the kind of people who can bring out the true colors of the little people. I saw glimmers of relief and overwhelming joy in the eyes of people out at Obama and Clinton rallies. They cared about them and understood that they were cared for. But at McCain and Palin's rallies, all I saw was an overzealous, almost violent need to win at any cost. In the end, Obama won to my utter most joy.

Since then, he has been the subject to unbelievable criticism. He has been called a socialist (despite the fact that aspects of our country has been very socialist for years), a Nazi, a racist (even though he was raised in a white family), and numerous other things that are all too illogical. I won't press the whole logic thing too much, I watch Lost for christ's sake, but it is an important factor as well as a given. The conservative party is making it a duty for all conservative citizens to totally demolish any liberal or non conservative action. God bless America. Yeah, damn that Obama for trying to get us universal healthcare. Damn him? Damn you. No, fuck you. Since when did all conservative's become the all righteous defenders of all things 20th century. It's not just stupid people, it's stupid racists. Get with the goddamn times. Your klan lost, and your nazis lost, and your confederation lost. I'm meeting people who are actually blaming Obama for the economy. Yeah, Obama is forced to clean up the last president's twin wars, sky rocketing gas prices, a recession, terrible healthcare, global warming, and a growing economic depression. Yeah this is ALL Obama's fault, even if we were in this shit before he was president. If anything, Obama's presidential ventures have shown me how fucking crazy people are and it's fuckin ridiculous. And now, people are actually trying to block a video message Obama is preparing to release to the American kids returning to school. All he wants to do, as he and his transcript have stated, is pretty much tell kids to stick to their books, and to make the right moves in school and in life. Many presidents have done this recently. But no, there must be some sort of socialist hidden message somewhere in the SEEMINGLY harmless text. Why let Obama speak when we had a great mind like George Bush telling college kids "We live in a great country where even a C student can become president." So, the point of this long ass post, my school has decided not to show students the president's message due to the requests of several right wing parents. So now my brother and I might be staying home on the day of the message so we can watch it. Suck on that, conservative action.

But for serious, WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?

This has been a short thesis on the latest pitfalls of our country from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Obama: American President, gun magnet

Recently, local republicans have shown up at Obama rallies carrying guns. Pistols and, if I'm not mistaken, asssualt rifles. Somehow these men weren't immediately detained or shot, seeing as how the last few times men have came near a President with guns John Kennedy was killed and Ronald Reagan was wounded. These armed men claimed to be carrying the guns with no other reason than the fact that they had a Constitutional right to bear arms. In essence, they are saying that John Wilkes Booth, Sirhan Sirhan Sirhan, Lee Harvey Oswald, James Earl Ray, and Mark David Chapman were all in the right just seconds before murdering Abraham Lincoln, Robert Kennedy, John Kennedy, Martin Luther King, and John Lennon. We got some real patriots in this country. These people came with many others baring signs that proclaim Obama is a racist Nazi... And they have guns. Knock, knock law enforcement. I know it's a shot in the dark, but I get the feeling that these guys may hate Obama. Indeed we do live in strange times, when a black man is arrested in his own home while white men can flash their hardware in front of the greatest power in the country and walk away clean. It's intimidation tactics, a fuckin blind person could see that.

My theory on why these gun toting sheeople were not at least escorted away from the area. I'm guessing it's the doing of conservative law enforcement. I mean, it's not like modern cops don't allow their political views to slip in past the law and corrupt their work. Remember, the kid getting tazed at John Kerry's speech for asking a legitimate but apparently liberal oriented question. "DON'T TAZE ME BRO!" Can anybody really say that they don't see the harm in allowing armed Obama detesters appear when he visits? Will it take a flurry of gunfire thrown at him before authorities do anything? I don't know, but in a world where logic is supposed to be commonplace I would think I would. If we keep this up, this country is gonna be going to hell in a hand basket very soon.

This has been a report of Americans actin a damn fool by Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

America: love it or hate it

"I made a mistake in selecting America as a land of freedom, a mistake I cannot repair in the balance of my lifetime." - Albert Einstien

Let's face it, America is in bad shape right now. We elected a well known screw up to the presidency after he stole the first election. The media has become obsessed with tackling anything but important issues. We have been led into war against a less than framed country. Prejudice, violence, and ignorance reigns among the masses of our people. Hope is a thing of the past for any true realist. Canada's looking pretty good right now.

We live in a time when the major political parties we are supposed to rely on are vastly flawed. The Democrats complain again and again without acting and make promises they don't have the heart to keep. The Republicans, a once great party, are fierce bullies out to ensure the future of their people and not The People. You see every day, Republicans beating down and raping the Democrats with methodical strength and tactics combined with deranged or stupid ideas that overthrow the more moralistic ideas. The funny thing is people actually believe the things that are being said and done. They are blind to logic. The ones who speak the truth are either viciously silenced or suffer a loss of spine. The government has never been a pure picture of upstandingness so I've always looked for the people to rely on. But now I can't even do that. Many of us are just acting senseless and crazy. We've become the bad radicals we bitch about every day. In a world where rationality is shelved in favor of pointless competition, I look at the future with uncertain eyes. Every day I find myself thinking changing my mind as to whether it will be better or worse.

I'm fifteen years old. I was dragged into this world of cutthroat politics and danger a little after the September 11th attacks. Many people probably were. When I first saw the news footage I was certain it had to have been an accident. I was only eight. I had no idea people were as evil as that. My world was different after that. I don't what kind of environment I will live in when I'm on my own. I don't know what war will be fought. I don't know what will be good or bad. All I know is that in the now things are looking chaotic.

In history class we are told the miraculous story of how our founding fathers stood up against their nation and fought to claim this country as a free land with fair liberties. These Sons of Liberty are what would today be called terrorists, evil evil terrorists. We are in essence a company founded on treason and terrorism. But so far, 300 years later, we have not succeeded in what they set out to do. We have fallen far to the brink.

I once had an idea, a very anarchistic idea. I believed that this country was getting so bad that the only way to make it better would be to destroy it. America must implode. There would be an unknown amount of time of mass disorder and chaos. No leaders and no law. Finally it would burn itself to the ground. And out of the ashes the little people who are left will rise up and put it back together so we could start over. Maybe all we need now is a second chance to get it right. One that wouldn't be squandered. It was just a thought.

Life has got to get better sometime. Right?

This has been a brief spew of thoughts from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.

Terminating With Extreme Prejudice...For Dummies

"Corruption and hypocrisy ought not be inevitbable products of democracy, as they undoubtedly are today." - Mahatma Gandhi

It's amazing the things I can learn from this thing called "News". For awhile now there's been some controversy regarding former vice president and tyrant Dick Cheney (surprise, surprise) and the CIA's covering up of a supposed plan to assassinate Al Queda members, including Osama Bin Laden. As liberal as I am, I honestly wouldn't even have another thought about taking the opportunity to kill Osama Bin Laden or anyone else involved in the attacks on our country. I don't think any American would. A man who orchestrated the attacks on September 11, 2001 and murdered countless people. If only we had just done this first instead of killing more innocent people and starting a war. That's something I also find sad: whenever an enemy attacks us we don't respond by just killing the enemy, but we respond by murdering their innocent countrymen who weren't involved whatsoever or in this case murdering people in the wrong country entirely. There's being a guilty coward and then there's being an OUTRIGHT PUSSY!!!

So yeah, I at first had no real problem with this plot against Al Queda, it would've been a load off my conscience. But the fact is that Cheney and the CIA lied (surprise, surprise) and tried to covertly kill these people illegitimatally, or illegally. This means it wasn't a just operation but a straight hit. They did not notify the public and went against their own code and conduct. Some people, some ignorant people won't mind this as they still believe Cheney is an almighty warrior of purity who will save their small little world. Guess what, Richard Cheney is a monster, he is honest to god scary. The Central Intelligence Agency is a wild card club of hitmen and backstabbers who have all of the tools and all of the power. These days the people with the most power are unfortunately corrupt. Hope that changes in years to come.

Oh and if you were gonna get caught couldn't you have at least done it after you killed those people? As nefarious as Cheney is, he was never that bright. But then was anybody in the Bush White House really that bright?...No, no they weren't.

This has been some light that needed shedding from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.