"I don't believe in God, but I envy those who do." - Jack Nicholson
Oh yes this is a topic of my most heated arguements with both believers and nonbelievers. Religion or God or an Afterlife. How to word this?... First off I guess you could call me an agnostic (or the pussy who doesn't wanna make waves with either side). I'd like to think of myself as more of a humanist. I also go through periods of nighilism, existenialism, and often absurdism. I will state plainly that I do not prepose to know that one side is right and the other is wrong. I don't claim to know what is true and what is not. I don't think anybody really knows. It is a bit stupid that I titled this post "The Meaning of Life". Because I honestly don't know what the meaning of life is. Maybe it is all a divine journey as stated in biblical text where the good transcend to a higher place, the bad descend into a realm of unimaginable pain and the uncertain are forgotten in a constant state of limbo. Perhaps life simply is the cosmic conicidence originating from some kind of primordial soup that made dead matter living matter that just changed again and again for millions of years and humanity just exists simply because evolution has reached this stage. Those are both pretty wild theories that are apparently becoming more credible each day. Either theory appeals to me as much as it does not I guess.
I suppose I find it most entertaining when the Christianists repeatedly try to shove it in my face. I mean it's like a drug PSA, you cannot watch TV without running into one. It's bound to come up and when it does there will be no end to it. No one can accept the policy of "to each his own". The thing I don't get is that these guys are never really clear on why they are trying to impose their faith on me. I mean, is it because they are concerned about me? Are they confused as to why I don't roll with their group? Are they threatened by the prospect that someone isn't laying back and accepting like some helpless rape victim (I know a very odd analogy)? I would believe my relatives would be concerned or afraid for my crossing over into their idea of hell but it is hard for me to believe that some friends or acquaintances are. I think they just want me to admit I'm wrong when I, like them, don't even know I'm right. So much happens. And even in a country where one can live as he or she chooses you can't escape the total chastising that comes with agreeing or disagreeing or agreeing to disagree. No one will ever think like you one hundred percent. I respect those who can practice what they believe in peacefully and if someone wants to join them they should out of their own free will. I admire the religious. I would only appreciate it some of them would not try to enforce their thoughts onto me because if I wanted to find religion I would find it myself (or maybe god would show me the way).
To please the believers I won't bash them first and will instead bash the nonbelievers. From what I've seen, atheists totally disagree with the whole spiritual genesis surrounding creation. They believe either it was clear cut evolution, always has been and always will be or they're like me and admit they don't know for sure. It is just as insensitive to just say someone is ignorant or stupid and say they are wrong. I won't lie, the evolution concept makes some sense to me but in another way so does the bible. I mean they are both really intricate with their details and always stick to their guns. Evolution has provided explanations for a great many things that I had before only wrote off as "pure mother nature". The whole point of my disagreement between these groups is that it is too damn easy to just write something off as wrong and another something right. We need to keep open minds and be open to all possible ideas. Take theories and consider them but don't hold to them unless all the evidence is in sight.
What I find most upsetting about the bible is the fact that it holds all of the answers. Plain, simple, unsatisfying answers. It's just too easy for people to say "it happened like this" and one book read later they can say "see I was right." Don't get me wrong, to some people it may seem cool. All these miracles, water walking, all the gory violence throughout, and let's not forget the greatest construction job in the history of history; I mean on a whim pretty much: earth! That may be cool to some but I think it'd be like much longer version of building a website: it is very long, very complex and very detailed and it might need constant improvements. I cannot forget my biggest complaint with religion as a whole. I grew up loving dinosaurs, I loved Jurassic Park since I was old enough to love anything and what pisses me off about religion is they claim that the entire jurassic period never happened because, of course, the earth is only 6,000 years old. That is unacceptable, and I know it's dumb but hey there's still a kid somewhere deep down in myself.
Both of these things are hard to swallow for me I guess, but I guess your mom feels the same way (sorry that was a cheap way to get in a joke, but I needed to lighten the mood of this post). I don't know. As wise as I sound, the truth is Your Modest Guru is only an American kid suffering from teen angst and confusion and my theories and ideas change as fast as the wind. But I had this idea. An idea where everyone walked outside and people approached each other and they just, for no apparent reason, apologized for the things they've said to each other and go through a long period "you were right" and "no you were right" on and on until they decide it is late, it's getting cold and they smile or shake hands and go back inside and the next day they would all be content with the fact that they didn't care anymore and could just take comfort in the fact that they could see themselves as people they know. People they hate, or love, or have fun with, or work with, or talk with and not as christians or atheists or agnostics or any kind of ism that exists. It's a lame idea I know but that would be nice even if it only lasted a short time. People will try to get me to join up with their groups or maybe just show me what it is all about and see if I like it and I may not like it but I can at least get used to it. I can accept that they believe this and odds are they will never stop believing, but they may not be able to accept that I may never believe it and maybe I never will. The Meaning of Life, if we ever find out, will most likely be more complicated and awe inspiring and remarkable than anything we could imagine. That's my opinion. But that's the whole thing. The Meaning of Life is a mystery. Life is a mystery. And maybe, just maybe, we cross the border between life and death, after that split second where our life flashes before our dying eyes, we get one more second. And in that second the entire answer is revealed and our reaction is priceless. Like the twist to a good movie, we will bring ourselves to smile or gasp and shout "No way!" over and over.
I will end off this long ass post that will most likely be controversial or thought provoking to readers (I'm pulling for the ladder) by telling you what my religion of choice would be. It would be compilation. The bastard child of an unprotected one night stand orgy consisting of every major religion that would grow to become more powerful than any religion ever conceived. People would bow. People would cheer. God, or Buddha, or Allah, or Jesus, or anything that people worship will come to worship this MEGA FAITH!!! Maybe then, when this groundbreaking practice of utter spiritualism hits, everyone on earth or in the universe will come together and will be compelled to look up at the sky and say what I always say because I can never figure out what's it all about or if something really spectacular is happening in the greatest distance:..."Huh"...
This has been a long and deep discussion on a hot topic from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.
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