Predators Review

"You are one ugly motherfucker." - Dutch Schaeffer (Arnold Schwarzeneggar)

Being a childhood fan of the original 1980s sci fi action movie, I was pumped to get back in the jungle when Predators started promotion. The original, while mainly one of the dozens of Schwarzeneggar actioner to come out in the 80s, was an intense, fun, and really cool science fiction thriller. It delivered a new and now very popular idea for an alien. The Predator. In that film it ambushed an elite commando unit dispatched into South American jungles. A sequel was produced a few short years later, that put a Predator in the middle of a horrifically humid Los Angeles, where it interrupted a war between gangsters and the LAPD. Then there were the Alien vs. Predator movies, a good idea that turned out mediocre due to it being handled by Paul W.S. Anderson, the man who ruined Mortal Kombat and Resident Evil with his lameass filmmaking. So yeah, let's just forget about that. But now we are graced with a REAL sequel to the previous two Predator films. Let's get back in the jungle.

Now the premise is this: a select few of Earth's deadliest killers, as well as a few not from Earth, are abducted by the Predators and dropped onto an alien planet that is used as a game preserve. The human candidates (tee hee) - consisting of an American mercenary Royce (Adrien Brody), an IDF sniper Isabelle (Alice Braga), an African freedom fighter Mombasa (Mahershalalhashbaz Ali), a Russian Spetsnaz commando Yuri (Oleg Taktarov), a death row inmate Stans (Walton Goggins), a secretive doctor Edwin (Topher Grace), a Yakuza assassin Hanzo (Louis Changchien), and a Mexican drug cartel enforcer Cuchillo (Danny Trejo) - must work together to survive the new breed of Predators, their treacherous traps, and the other creatures dropped on to the planet with them. Make way for the guns and violence.

As far as story goes, there's not a whole lot of it. The story is as clear cut as the above paragraph states: Run, fight, or die. What really carries the movie is the Predators and the characters we are introduced to. They pretty much are all ruthless killers, but they still have personalities. Every one of them gets a chance to shine in a battle and they are all badasses. The only problem is they all have their own interesting personalities, you kinda want to get to know them better but that doesn't really get to happen because they start to get picked off one by one. There are character bits I really enjoyed: the death row inmate Stans' deranged but very candid vulgarity; the Yakuza man Hanzo preferring to walk barefoot in the jungle than ruin his shoes. I really like the fact that there is a blood feud between this new advanced group of Predators and the original Predators. A Predator is always an interesting creature, the way it moves, the way it fights, the way it hunts. Predators really do embody the perfect killers, it's terrifying to even think about going toe to toe with one. They have their vast array of cool toys: the cloaking device, the voice mimicry, a retractable forearm blade, the shoulder cannon, the nets (which usually cut into you when you struggle, but not here), heat and sonar vision. Spoiler!!! There is unfortunately no arm nuke, at least none that was used (I'm kinda glad they didn't; it kinda makes the universe's perfect killers look like cheap pussies when they can just nuke everyone if they start to lose). So yeah the good guys were awesome to watch and the Predators were clearly awesome to watch.

Now on to the technical aspect. The direction is by Nimrod Antal, who directed a very suspensful thriller called Vacancy that I enjoyed. Here he directs with as much skill and talent as John McTiernan once did for the original film. Robert Rodriguez is the one who got this film going though, and with his name in the title cards I had to expect a freaking terrific action flick; unless it's a PG-13 kids movie otherwise I don't wanna be involved (I get bad chills when I think of Spy Kids.) There are a lot of callbacks to the first movie that I really loved. The film uses the same score which was awesome and even has a Little Richard tune thrown in. I've always found the jungle to be a very unique place to have a story set. A jungle can be so beautiful and intricate like a city while also being dangerous and unforgiving like a desert. Plus, what better place for survival and a good hunt. There are even similar scenes from the original: "Turn around! Over here!", "COME ON, KILL ME!", a fatalistic mono y mono fight, a fall by a waterfall. The actors are all well chosen and are all convincing. A lot of people didn't have faith in Adrien Brody as the man to carry the Arnold torch this time around; I did and I wasn't wrong, he was a total badass (there needs to be a movie that has nothing but Oscar winners playing badasses, they'd call it The Academy.) Alice Braga was great and I knew she would be too; she's getting more and more movie roles and with good reason, she is an effective actress. Topher Grace (yes, Eric from That '70s Show) is quick witted and sarcastic as ever, but I'm glad there was more to him. He shows he can really really act here. Laurence Fishburne was awesome though his role was mainly used for exposition, but it's always great seeing him. He went from a laconic badass to a raving lunatic in a really funny way, it was like a weird caricature. I wish Danny Trejo had been around longer, he seems to always play 15 second badasses; at least Rodriguez is finally giving him his own movie. Everyone is great, let's leave it at that. To sum it up, special effects are terrific, I'm glad the Predators weren't total CGI, the sets were fantastic, the acting was great, directing was great.

It's been awhile since I've seen a really good action movie. I love reliving old classics as well so I got everything I wanted. There will be negative reviews of course, but in my opinion Predators was awesome. It was a bit like what people are saying: Predators is to Predator what Aliens was to Alien. I like that idea. It was fun, exhilerating even, suspenseful, scary and a kick ass summer movie. If you want just like an uber badass experience and a movie that is smart but not really complex, this is it. I had a helluva time watching this so go GET TO THE CHOPPAH and check it out if you fancy.

This has been another somewhat nostalgic review from Your Modest Guru. Thanks for reading.